Kshaler
Hummingbird
Joined: Feb 28, 2012
Posts: 20
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 Posted: Tue Apr 10, 2012 1:42 pm Post subject: |
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| LOL my son still does this and he is 12 it is just imaginative play no worries ! And I have to say my son is 12 and I still have not told him I never wanted him to think there is something wrong with him because I don't believe there is he just has a few challenges that make it a little harder to get him where he needs to be but we will get there ! |
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zette
Phoenix
Joined: Jul 28, 2011
Posts: 572
Location: California
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| Posted: Tue Apr 10, 2012 3:23 pm Post subject: |
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| I wouldn't exactly recommend this approach, but here's what happened for us. My son overheard us mention Aspergers at a few doctors and therapy apps. He started commenting that he didn't want to be in the social skills class because "some of those kids have Aspergers.". I was on the verge of telling my husband that we needed to talk to DS6 about AS, when DS piped up one day,"Do I have Asbergers?". I replied,"Yes, you do.", then read him [u]What It Means to Be Me (An Aspergers Kid Book)[\u]. He asked me to read it a second time, then said, "that book didn't help me at all!". I imagine it will be an ongoing discussion. |
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Sweetleaf
Metalhead
Joined: Jan 07, 2011
Age: 23
Posts: 14794
Location: Somewhere in Colorado
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| Posted: Tue Apr 10, 2012 3:45 pm Post subject: |
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| Silas wrote: | I have two kids on the spectrum (and autism runs in both my family and my wife's, so even her and I have some pretty strong traits lol), but have not told either child about the diagnosis.
I need to tread lightly, because I don't want my kids using the diagnosis as an excuse, or to feel inadequate, etc. As far as I am concerned, they do not have a "disorder" but are "wired differently" and they need help adjusting to the NT world.
My oldest son's Asperger's might cause him trouble in some areas (coordination, interpersonal communication), but it also gives him great advantages: tremendous memory, the ability to do difficult calculations in his head (much better than I can, and he is  , and the ability to imagine extremely abstract principles far beyond what would be expected at his age (he thinks about things like quantum physics, nuclear fusion, evolution, etc. all the time). So it is a mixed bag for sure. |
Well an excuse for what, it is a fact that having autism will interfere with things.....to ignore that it will do that and seeing any acknowledgement of autism causing difficulties as an excuse is not the best idea either. It can actually hurt a lot when you try to explain why certain things are difficult and everyone just dismisses it as excuses.
_________________
It's like alice in wonderland except, my names not alice and this is the real world not a dream. |
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scubasteve
Phoenix
Joined: Dec 18, 2009
Age: 28
Posts: 993
Location: Ann Arbor, Michigan
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| Posted: Sat Apr 14, 2012 8:18 pm Post subject: |
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My parents never told me. For me, this worked out very well: I got the services for it, but it never came to define who I am, or what should be expected of me. Obviously, all children and parents are different, and I'm not suggesting that everyone should do this. However, I think it is important for make sure they understand that they don't have to be a certain way once they have that label. They can do anything they set their mind to. They may have to work harder at it, but they can.
They are different... Not limited. |
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rileyup
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Apr 15, 2012
Posts: 38
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| Posted: Sun Apr 15, 2012 8:52 pm Post subject: |
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| she will eventually find out that there is something wrong and will probably ask you. i asked my mom if i had it when i was about 5 and she said yes. just let the time come, |
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smurf
Emu Egg
Joined: Dec 19, 2010
Posts: 7
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| Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 4:39 pm Post subject: |
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| zette wrote: | I wouldn't exactly recommend this approach, but here's what happened for us. My son overheard us mention Aspergers at a few doctors and therapy apps. He started commenting that he didn't want to be in the social skills class because "some of those kids have Aspergers.". I was on the verge of telling my husband that we needed to talk to DS6 about AS, when DS piped up one day,"Do I have
?". I replied,"Yes, you do.", then read him [u]What It Means to Be Me (An Aspergers Kid Book)[\u]. He asked me to read it a second time, then said, "that book didn't help me at all!". I imagine it will be an ongoing discussion. |
Thank you. This post made my day. Very funny and very relevant. |
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Eureka-C
Velociraptor
Joined: Sep 12, 2011
Age: 40
Posts: 495
Location: DallasTexas, USA
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| Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 4:57 pm Post subject: |
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| This can be very difficult. We are an open family and my 11 y.o. DS has known from the first day when we suspected until he was finally diagnosed with PDD-NOS. Nevertheless, whenever I watch some movie or read something out loud to my husband, or show my son some book or video clip so I think he will relate, his response is "That kid is just weird." He totally has no clue and will deny totally that he is the same way. He will just point out the minuscule details of how he is different from that kid. Still, he has started talking about having Asperger's and things he can do because of Asperger's and things that are hard because of Asperger's so that is a start. I think it is a process, and the balance of understanding the ins and outs of the diagnosis and the personal issues of it all takes time, insight, development, and lots of support. |
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alongfortheride
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Mar 17, 2012
Posts: 25
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| Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 5:05 pm Post subject: |
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| Eureka-C, I don't think that is that uncommon. My son can see the difference in behaviors of those that aren't as high on the spectrum as he is, yet cannot recognize differences in what he may be doing or perceiving versus how someone NT would react or act in the same situation. |
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Heidi80
Phoenix
Joined: Dec 05, 2011
Age: 33
Posts: 505
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| Posted: Wed Apr 18, 2012 8:05 am Post subject: |
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| The best way to tell a child would probably be to focus on the positive traits. Like tell your daughter that her brain works differently, which makes her extra smart. Asperger's is a good thing, because society needs people who can think outside the box. |
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jmorse28
Butterfly
Joined: Jan 04, 2011
Posts: 15
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| Posted: Sat Apr 21, 2012 11:18 pm Post subject: |
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| Eureka-C wrote: | | liloleme wrote: |
My husbands Father thinks we should stop my son from doing what he calls "playing in his head". He runs back and forth, talks and makes exploding noises....he is doing the same thing I did and still do, just mainly without the dialog but I have made hand gestures, laughed and even cried because of something that happened to one of my characters. |
Thank you for making me smile. My son does this too.  And I love it about him. |
MY son does this too! He does it in the privacy of his own room and ONLY in there with the doors closed. Sometimes the voices freak me out and he can get loud so we have to tell him to settle down. I feel bad that it embarrasses him so I make I tell him that it's nothing to be embarrassed about, some people paces, some bite their nails, some shake their legs, some SMOKE! He runs around making noise. My dad hates it. It stresses him out to "see him like that" but I tell him that it's normal for my son so my dad just needs to get over it.
My son is now 16 and he's known for a long time. We have 2 other NT kids and my Aspie is very picky about his food. So often times 4 of us are having one meal and I have to make a different for my Aspie. So my NT kids would ask why HE got to have pizza while they have to eat fish. So I would say that because he has Asperger's he has an aversion to lots of foods that they have no problem eating. So of course everyone would ask questions and I answered them honestly. Of course it was a big joke "ass burgers". But now that my son is older he asks what he was like when he was little, how was he diagnosed, etc. And I'm honest. I tell him what a nightmare it was when we didn't know he has Asperger's, how he progressed and how I would never want to change him. It makes him who he is, it makes him such an avid reader, a great student, a compassionate loving person and not your typical pain in the @ss teenager. He doesn't want anyone to know he's an Aspie because he knows how other teens can be. But when someone (like my dad) tells him "you need to be like this or stop doing that" he says very confidently, "this is who I am so you just need to deal with it". LOVE THAT!!! I've also listed all the famous people who are thought to have Asperger's. Makes him kinda proud. |
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