how meany friends do you really need?

NicoleG · Posted: Fri May 25, 2012 11:44 pm Post subject:

Growing up I only ever had between 1-3 close friends at any time.

About 7 years ago I became social with this HUGE group of goth/poly people in my area. I made a lot of friends, but I was never really sure if I actually counted any as close friends, even though I used the terminology to describe a few as such, but mostly because that was the social-emotional custom of this group. These people are so emotional-drama it has my head spinning. I've managed to royally screw some things up (I fit in well enough that it actually took me a while to really get "caught"), so now I'm pretty well ostracized from the group. I'm still working to pull myself away from everyone again. I will miss having so many people to hang out with, but I really need a break from all of that.

Now, I go to dinner a couple times a month with 2 close friends. I still have my 3 best friends that I actually rarely see but they fall under the friends-for-life (aka "family") category, and I still have my 4 roommates. As we're all gamers, our house tends to have guests pretty regularly for LAN gaming and RPGs, and we'll gather some "regulars" for going out to see a movie, and I like to have fondue and poker nights occasionally, but restricted to just a few guests (the poker table only seats 6 anyway). So far this is comfortable for me. I still run off into my bedroom and shut my door when I need to get away from people, but being a naturally outgoing introvert, I still need people time as much as I need me-time, and there's just enough people around to keep me busy but neither overwhelmed nor lonely. I do wish I had a boyfriend, though, as I feel lonely in that respect, but that's a whole separate issue from general friends and social interactions.