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richardbenson
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22 Sep 2007, 2:13 pm

i dont like it either :?



jjstar
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22 Sep 2007, 4:08 pm

I have a thing with boundaries and maintaining them. So i'm pretty hypervigilant when it comes to my space and people invading it with touching me without asking.



Arbie
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22 Sep 2007, 4:39 pm

It is creepy when someone with no boundaries, or who is unwilling to respect boundaries touches me. I can't remember the last time anyone has ever touched my face though. It's not even something my parents used to do when I was a kid, but I did have a bad habit of hitting them in the face if they tried to get too affectionate when I was a toddler, at least so they have told me.



Crystalmirror
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22 Sep 2007, 7:06 pm

When I was in my early teens, I didn't like people touching me ANYWHERE. I even disliked by mom's touch. I don't know if maybe I just had more of an attitude back then or what. I've gotten more comfortable with people I know well touching me, but I still have one or two objections to it, like when my dad elbows me in the side or the arm to get my attention.



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22 Sep 2007, 7:12 pm

Yea I hate when people touch me too, it drives me insane, I can handle it if its my boyfriend, or I guess somebody I know thats real close, but other then that, I get very angry and frustrated.


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jjstar
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23 Sep 2007, 7:51 am

re the boundary issue - people take liberties until you set them right. Next time, they'll be more careful, guranteed. And if they stll don't get it, I'll send the message home verbally with a stinger. My body and space isn't a playground for anyone and anything to come in and feel free to frolic. It's sacred, it's personal and it's off limits till I say otherwise. Usually they get it first time around.



Irulan
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23 Sep 2007, 9:17 am

I'm joining the club :lol: I hate having my face or generally head touched. I also don't like too much having my face covered with a cream or wet hair. Even when it's myself who touches my face, I do it always carefully and delicately.



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23 Sep 2007, 2:16 pm

AspieMartian wrote:
I don't like being touched by most people, even friends and family. The most awkward is hugging, because people who are close to you - or rather, think they're close to you - expect it. I hate hugging in most cases, and if I'm in a situation where I'm expected to hug 1) I NEVER initiate it - it has to be the other person and 2) I try to make it the shortest hug ever.

I don't like having my face touched either, but fortunately this doesn't happen very often. The only real issue I have had with this recently was a very casual friend, someone I only knew through another friend, who was overly affectionate wih other women all the time. She would insist on hugging and kissing me, as she did with other people, and was totally oblivious to how uncomfortable it made me. I could live with the hugging - I've learned to tolerate that without showing how completely weirded out I am - but the kissing, no. She would try to kiss people on the lips even! Ugh!! I would hve to move very quickly so she would end up kissing my check instead. I would avoid this person as much as possible because of this, and I came to be so anxious about her trtying to huug/kiss that just the sound of her voice coming frrom a distance or from another room would make me jump.

In epitaph, the friend through whom I know this person recently "burned" me (the same one I posted about in The Haven), so I don't have to see the serial hugger/kisser anymore. LOL. And honestly, I feel very relieved by that.


Lol....serial hugger! Yes, I feel the same way about hugging, kissing, touching...all that just isn't for me. If it's my AS or not, I don't like it. I think a lot of it has to do with AS though. I think being down, upset or crying over something is a different experience than it is for NT's, but it irritates me when someone, family or whatever, thinks I need a hug. I sometimes think hugging and all that is more for the giver than the receiver, in my case anyway. When I hear someone say "Aww, you need a hug." I cringe and think "No, no I don't, stop it....noo!" I go along with it anyway, all the while hating it and figuring at least it makes them feel better and yes, I too keep it short. It's like "Hug..ok, that's good, now get away."



Juxtaposed Phantasia
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10 Dec 2020, 1:31 am

I really don't like when people touch my face. One guy would always want to gently touch my chin/face while kissing, even after I told him I hated it and asked him not to do it. It's like he couldn't help himself or something, which I find to be really odd, and quite honestly, I don't understand the allure of wanting to touch someone's face. I'd be happier with a firm grab rather than a soft touch. I also have issues with people touching/kissing my neck. Whenever I had exes touch my face/neck, it freaked me out, especially if it was a gentle touch. I'd much prefer a more pressurized touch, if anything.
Now that I think about it, when I was little, my mom would kiss my forehead and nose and both cheeks and when she got to my chin, she'd do this thing where she'd playfully pretend to be eating my chin and make like a "nahm nahm nahm" noise and I'd always freak out and squirm all over.. and because it tickled, my bodily reflex reaction was to squirm and laugh. Everyone used to tickle me when I was younger, and because I laughed, maybe they thought I enjoyed it? No matter how many times I'd tell them I hate it and that it's painful and uncomfortable, they still did it. I still hate to be tickled by anyone, and have learned to control the feeling for the most part. I noticed that when people find out how ticklish I can be, that for some reason makes them want to torture me. But it is literally one of the most uncomfortable/painful/annoying feelings. At some points while being tickled, I'd flail everywhere; part reflex and part hoping to injure the other person so they back off.
8O


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shortfatbalduglyman
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10 Dec 2020, 9:26 am

Coronavirus



KT67
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10 Dec 2020, 9:36 am

No wonder, it's usually completely inappropriate.

Why would someone other than your wife or a doctor touch your face?

I don't feel touch sensitive about it but I'd be freaked out.

My mum's NT and doesn't like when my stepdad does it. That's more unusual cos it's not 'weird' for spouses. I think it's cos of medical reasons, she's protective over her head. She hates birds/butterflies flapping about near her face too.


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Joe90
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10 Dec 2020, 10:26 am

I thought touching someone's face was socially inappropriate, unless it's your spouse or kids. It's not like I'm going to go into work tonight and start touching everyone's faces when I greet them. It would most likely creep people out.


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quite an extreme
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10 Dec 2020, 5:22 pm

Juxtaposed Phantasia wrote:
Everyone used to tickle me when I was younger, and because I laughed, maybe they thought I enjoyed it?

At least they enjoyed you laughing afterwards. :mrgreen: That may have been cute and why they did it. :wink:


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Juxtaposed Phantasia
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10 Dec 2020, 8:41 pm

quite an extreme wrote:
Juxtaposed Phantasia wrote:
Everyone used to tickle me when I was younger, and because I laughed, maybe they thought I enjoyed it?

At least they enjoyed you laughing afterwards. :mrgreen: That may have been cute and why they did it. :wink:


Lol that sounds pretty accurate! My pain is their pleasure :twisted: 8)


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