D1nk0 wrote:
With no intention to be defamatory, I am starting to conclude that one of the ways in which asperger syndrome affects women is that it results in a weaker sex drive(sometimes NO sex drive Whatsover). Apparently there are also many men who are afflicted the same way-though I personally am NOT one of them. I do know that (mani-depressive)bipolar disorder seems to affect women in the opposite way: bipolar womn often have abnormally strong sex drives whenever they get manic.
I keep seing posts hinting at: "women dont really want sex and dont like it, they just use it as a currency" which is Totally UNTRUE when it comes to most NT women but aspie women are another story.....
I do think that there can be a connection between ASS and lower sex drive, but i think ASS is not always the one and only source of that. I think it's depended on the person. If i look to myself, i had sex drive issues almost all my life, even when i did get married. But i also know periods of don't have that issues at all. When i went deeper to the search of myself, i discovered that most of this sex-issues were not coming from my ASS, but more of experience. Bad sex education from my parents in combination with bad sex experiences with men. And the general image about women that still rules through society these days. In a kind of way, i am sexually abused. Not only physical, but also emotional and spiritual.
A couple of years ago, i went to see a therapist (together with my husband), who's specializes in sex issues. She had no experience with people on the spectrum, and that was exactly my intention. Because to me, not everything has to point at my ASS. I am more than my ASS. I am also a woman. It was the best step i could take in my relationship with my husband. I learned to overcome my trauma's, and finally feel just like a woman, not a woman with ASS and sex issues. You know, there are A LOT of women with sex(drive) issues!! It's not only emotions, but also chemistry. We women are so complex, it's a miracle when it's going right al the time!
My point here is that i hope that people not have to trow everything on the ASS, but see a bigger picture here. Because the fact is that women are VERY different creatures! They are way more complex than men when it comes to their sexuality. I now know that my sex issues were caused more by the fact that i really didn't know and understood what it's mean to be a woman. I mean what it really means to be a woman; physical, emotional, spiritual.... To understand it, not only by mind and in theory, but also by feeling and even further! Because when you see it that way, you see that ASS or any other thing has nothing to do with sexuality. As women, we are all the same! It's universal! We just need to be understood.
I think that ASS (or any other diagnosis) is not the cause of sex issues, it's just something that isn't always helpful to solve them maybe. But it's not impossible! I know that, because i did it. You know, there are solutions! Ofcourse, when you have to take medications that have a influence on sex drive, it's very difficult. But a good doctor will think with you, not for you. I hope that all (ass)women learn that it is wrong to think that there is nothing to solve here, and think they just have to live with it. Because it's not true! If you're born as a woman, then all the potentials are there to really be a woman in every way. Ass or not.
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If you got rid of all the autism genetics, you wouldn't have science or art. All you would have is a bunch of social 'yak yaks.' - Temple Grandin
27 Oct 2013, 5:37 am
