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eddiedog8
a man works in a sweet shop what does he weigh?
Joined: Aug 02, 2007
Age: 9
Posts: 1269
Location: not in my house not in my street not in my shool but in my own world
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 Posted: Sat Apr 19, 2008 10:13 am Post subject: |
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| Smelena wrote: | One of the stupid jokes my friends and I used to do at high-school was go up to a boy and say,
"Wanna screw?"
Then hand them a screw.
Pretty bad, but at the time we thought we were hilarious.
Helen |
super lol!
_________________
(.•´¸.•*¨) ¸.•*¨)
(¸.•´ (¸.•´ .•´ ¸¸.•¨¯`•.)
i love quite places and i h8 inside trains i h8 boring stuff
you have a problem with that?
http://aspiesplanet.slarti3.myfreeforum.org/ <--visit it ty |
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DeaconBlues
They call Alabama the Crimson Tide - call me...
Joined: Apr 22, 2007
Posts: 1240
Location: Earth, mostly
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| Posted: Sat Apr 19, 2008 2:33 pm Post subject: |
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At Denny's: "How would you like your eggs cooked?"
"Yeah, that'd be great, thanks!"
Legend tells of a time at a sci-fi convention when famed author Harlan Ellison (who stands about 5' 2") came up to an attractive woman and asked her point-blank, "What would you say to a little f*ck?"
She looked down at him and replied, "Hello, little f*ck."
_________________
"There's a reason why you separate the military and the police. One fights the enemy of the state. The other serves and protects the people. When the military becomes both, the enemies of the state tend to become the people." -- Cdr Bill Adama |
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MartyMoose
Velociraptor
Joined: Apr 01, 2008
Age: 19
Posts: 456
Location: Chicago
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| Posted: Sun Apr 20, 2008 4:51 pm Post subject: |
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"I hope nobody ever asks me to show them the ropes, I have no Idea where they are"
-George Carlin |
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DJRnold
Snowy Owl
Joined: Jan 25, 2008
Posts: 140
Location: Barrie, Ontario, Canada
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| Posted: Sun Apr 20, 2008 8:57 pm Post subject: |
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Them: What's up?
Me: The sky
Them: What's up?
Me: Your blood pressure
Them: What's up?
Me: The opposite of down |
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MartyMoose
Velociraptor
Joined: Apr 01, 2008
Age: 19
Posts: 456
Location: Chicago
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| Posted: Sun Apr 20, 2008 8:57 pm Post subject: |
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| DJRnold wrote: | Them: What's up?
Me: The sky
Them: What's up?
Me: Your blood pressure
Them: What's up?
Me: The opposite of sown |
what is a sown |
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MartyMoose
Velociraptor
Joined: Apr 01, 2008
Age: 19
Posts: 456
Location: Chicago
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| Posted: Sun Apr 20, 2008 8:58 pm Post subject: |
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| DJRnold wrote: | Them: What's up?
Me: The sky
Them: What's up?
Me: Your blood pressure
Them: What's up?
Me: The opposite of down |
Hows it hanging?
Loosely to the left |
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MartyMoose
Velociraptor
Joined: Apr 01, 2008
Age: 19
Posts: 456
Location: Chicago
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| Posted: Sun Apr 20, 2008 9:12 pm Post subject: |
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"A woman told me she had a yeast infection, well bake me a F*ckin loaf of bread!"
-George Carlin |
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syzygyish
Dada Dodo
Joined: Feb 04, 2007
Age: 41
Posts: 2703
Location: seeking freedom
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| Posted: Mon Apr 21, 2008 4:05 am Post subject: |
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Them: "How you going?"
Me: "Bipedally, at the moment."
_________________
I have a vocabulary and I'm not afraid to use it.
If that doesn't scare you
I'll pull out my vernacular! |
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TallyMan
Bad to the bone
Joined: Mar 31, 2008
Age: 47
Posts: 1446
Location: Englishman lost in France
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| Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 7:24 am Post subject: |
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Perhaps not funny in the retelling, but a couple of weeks ago I took the dogs to the kennels before going on holiday. I was presented with a form to complete and alongside the question "Food?" I just put "Yes". The kennel owner found this amusing then asked me to elaborate with quantity, type and when to feed. Duh! Why didn't they pose the question like that  |
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