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Veresae
succubus bait
Joined: Feb 25, 2006
Age: 20
Posts: 3215
Location: California
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 Posted: Sun Jul 13, 2008 11:47 pm Post subject: |
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| When people are silent to me I feel uncomfortable, like they're bored and either don't really feel like talking to me and only tollerating my presence, or they're expecting me to say something 'cus they want to talk but don't know what to talk about. And with many people I know it's the same way. XD "Awkward silences," anyone? |
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deadeyexx
Snowy Owl
Joined: Sep 11, 2007
Age: 27
Posts: 131
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| Posted: Mon Jul 14, 2008 12:34 pm Post subject: |
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Don't even try to put a positive spin on being silent or socially inactive. The only "mystery" to come out of it is other people wondering what your problem is.
From experience, I've found a directly positive correlation between my social activity & female interest. |
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Dracula
Velociraptor
Joined: Nov 23, 2007
Age: 19
Posts: 412
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| Posted: Mon Jul 14, 2008 8:18 pm Post subject: |
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| deadeyexx wrote: | | Don't even try to put a positive spin on being silent or socially inactive. |
I went there and did that, and will do it many more times.
| Quote: | | The only "mystery" to come out of it is other people wondering what your problem is. |
Partially. That can be beneficial.
| Quote: | | From experience, I've found a directly positive correlation between my social activity & female interest. |
Where did I imply to halt social activity with women? Nowhere.
Men need to learn that constantly flappin' their trap won't get them layed. |
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dtoxic
Deinonychus
Joined: Jun 23, 2008
Age: 38
Posts: 313
Location: Boston MA
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| Posted: Mon Jul 14, 2008 9:06 pm Post subject: |
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| Why was being thanked from behind overwhelming? |
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Dracula
Velociraptor
Joined: Nov 23, 2007
Age: 19
Posts: 412
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| Posted: Tue Jul 15, 2008 12:09 am Post subject: |
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| dtoxic wrote: | | Why was being thanked from behind overwhelming? |
For one thing, nobody likes being approached from behind. |
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No_YOU_get_over_it
Toucan
Joined: Jun 29, 2008
Posts: 255
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| Posted: Tue Jul 15, 2008 5:28 pm Post subject: |
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| dtoxic wrote: | | Why was being thanked from behind overwhelming? |
I'm presuming you're male. In large part, this isn't an AS issue - it's a male-female vulnerability thing. Women live with a constant underlying sense of vulnerability. Generally I place myself so my back isn't exposed. Apparently I felt safe enough that I let down my guard. And he took advantage of that opening, for what reason I will never know. Unawareness, probably.
Paying and being cordial to the waiter was already enough for my brain to process at once; the guy coming up even from the side and talking to me during that would have been confusing. That coming from behind prompted panic and an urge to vomit. Which ruined a lot of the calm I'd attained by hydrating and reading the news rag and generally winding down after a rough day. I know he was leaving as well, but if he had waited 30 seconds I'd have responded.
Oh, as an aside: I hate it when men offer to buy a drink b/c it seems like they're trying to rent attention and conversation time. Plus, too many guys get ripped off by women who think it's cute to be bought drinks, and accept drinks from men in whom they have no interest. Lose-lose. So I was still feeling off in a Weltschmerz kind of way about this as I was leaving, and just didn't want to deal with it.
"Thanks" (well, 50/50 thanks/sarcasm) to my parents' training, I generally walk etc. in a way that makes people think I'm fearless. This is useful when I drive into a colorful area of the Bronx to get inexpensive Latin-American food. It's counter-productive most of the rest of the time, b/c one, I don't waken men's protective instincts, and two, they don't imagine it's necessary to exercise caution in approaching me.
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- NYGOI
NB: contents of above post represent my opinion at time of post only. YMMV, NAYY, and most importantly, IALBTC! |
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Social_Fantom
Unmasked
Joined: Feb 23, 2008
Age: 24
Posts: 11727
Location: Dobson, North Carolina
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| Posted: Tue Jul 15, 2008 11:37 pm Post subject: |
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This kind of goes in with the confidence thing, I've always tried to be silently confident, which means that I don't need to constantly brag about myself in order to impress anyone and ultimately myself. I've always found that guys that are constantly talking are usually talking about themselves and their "achievements." They are usually the ones with the fragile egos, which is another topic. I've always kept quiet, mostly because I don't know how to socialize properly, but also because I don't need to reassure myself or others of my own good points.
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Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.
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Omar
Blue Jay
Joined: Jul 13, 2008
Age: 22
Posts: 78
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| Posted: Wed Jul 16, 2008 2:43 am Post subject: |
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| Dracula wrote: | | dtoxic wrote: | | Why was being thanked from behind overwhelming? |
For one thing, nobody likes being approached from behind. |
oh... omar dont know if there be full truth to that remark my good sir |
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SIXLUCY
Phoenix
Joined: Jul 14, 2008
Age: 31
Posts: 895
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| Posted: Wed Jul 16, 2008 2:45 am Post subject: |
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I love being approached from behind  |
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MissConstrue
~Age of Aquarius~
Joined: Feb 05, 2008
Posts: 12112
Location: Anywhere but HERE!
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| Posted: Wed Jul 16, 2008 12:08 pm Post subject: |
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Actually switching the gender roles, I'm somewhat of the silent type. Except I don't really think a guy would prefer a girl with mysteries or a dame who chats with a great deal given something of "valuable" interest......that wouldn't make her an AS now would it? 
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Oh you can't help that. We're all mad here.
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6thSin:Envy |
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