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Hector
Phoenix
Joined: Mar 11, 2008
Age: 22
Posts: 1023
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 Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 10:43 am Post subject: |
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| It's a bit of a stereotype. I personally don't make very good company with myself. |
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ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo
Phoenix
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Joined: Jun 19, 2008
Posts: 1911
Location: US, midmap
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| Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 3:47 pm Post subject: |
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| veruniel wrote: | | I like to be alone in my room, but I'm very glad I have a housemate. She's my very dear friend and she watches out for me. And I need watching out for, because of my depressive bouts. And while I don't like being in crowds or large groups of people and value my time alone, I do very much enjoy company. Sometimes my housemate and I will sit in the same room together, reading and essentially not communicating but enjoying the closeness of another person. And I have a notaboyfriend (for lack of a better word) whom I see at least once a week, usually more. He's also comfortable with silence (and I strongly suspect he's AS) and we spend a lot of time just sitting quietly together. I value both our interaction and our moments of silence. In short, I like to be alone but not all the time. I certainly wouldn't want to cut myself off from other people. |
I'm glad you found a good room mate! |
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jayssite
Blue Jay
Joined: Feb 01, 2008
Age: 20
Posts: 81
Location: Near Poughkeepsie, NY
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| Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 3:49 pm Post subject: |
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| veruniel wrote: | | And I have a notaboyfriend (for lack of a better word) |
I think "male friend" would fit |
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Averick
Calculateurre of Chaos
Joined: Mar 06, 2007
Age: 29
Posts: 2170
Location: in the trenches..
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| Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 4:07 pm Post subject: |
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| Yep, i like to be alone. Though it's nice to be around someone at least once a day. |
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anbuend
Oak-Type Autie
Joined: Jul 06, 2004
Posts: 3311
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| Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 4:39 pm Post subject: |
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By the way this blog post about Autreat by a friend of mine is probably relevant to this thread.
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"We may seem in the gutter from up there where you are but maybe you don't know we still see the same stars." -Donna Williams |
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qaliqo
Pileated woodpecker
Joined: Apr 01, 2008
Posts: 181
Location: SW Ohio
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| Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 5:10 pm Post subject: Mostly... |
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Touching on a nerve here, having enjoyed living solo more than with others.
Yes, prefer to be alone. Yes, enjoy being around people, especially those who like me around -- not those who want me to be like them. Had lots of roomies over the years, most seemed like more trouble than worth. Had a girlfriend/fiance/wife, lived with her from May 2001-August 2007, Aspie-ness a primary reason it didn't work.
Un-DXed, but went to therapy for many years as a child, mostly to the tune of "what a smart-a-- jerk". Finally realize that AS describes 95% of problems with authority figures, parents, and peers. Wish it had been known 20 years ago, would have saved lots of trouble and hardship, all bridge underwise with the water.
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q/p |
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ImMelody
Phoenix
Joined: Jun 10, 2008
Posts: 790
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| Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 5:28 pm Post subject: |
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I can't stand being alone.. At the same time I can't stand being around a lot of people.. I can't stand being around people who don't take me for me. And not the face value me.. Who I really am when I'm finally comfortable. Yeah, I come off as shy and subservient (I really do in real life) and "helpless" (for lack of a better word), but so many people don't even try to get past the initial appearance. And yeah, new situations overwhelm me.. But I have found over the years that I need to sit in this situations (not interact) before I'm ever comfortable (rarely does this happen).
I'm glad I found someone sorta like me.. Where I have tons of focus, he has barely any (lolAS with lolADHD)... Where I worry, he's comforting (because he never was as a child).. When I'm tired of interaction, he usually is too (guess it must be just as hard for him with ADHD to always act collected).. And we have two kids who also get tired of constant interaction.. So we can generally coincide in the same place without driving each other cuckoo.
So really what I'm saying is.. I can't stand to be alone.. But that doesn't mean I always want to interact.  |
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CRACK
Phoenix
Joined: Nov 03, 2005
Age: 21
Posts: 812
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| Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 5:41 pm Post subject: |
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| Everybody needs their alone time and their together time. And its no different for us, except that we learn to make the most out of our alone time since the latter can be a strain. |
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Hodor
Phoenix
Joined: Mar 18, 2008
Age: 19
Posts: 834
Location: On a dumb island
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| Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 6:25 pm Post subject: |
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Hodor likes being alone, hates being lonely. Hodor also sometimes refers to himself in the third person.
Since I completely fail at social interaction, I've built my life around avoiding much contact with many people outside the family. It's bad, and it doesn't do me any good, but I don't have anything in common with anyone, so part of the package of being alone most of the time means that I'm also lonely most of the time. But I'm not complaining, it's my choice to avoid contact with other people.
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ACHTUNG all WP'ers...I will not be online from Aug 18th for a while due to a house move. I'm still alive and well but might not have internet access for some time. So long!
[I have updated my blawg.]
Sprecst žu englisc? |
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PunkyKat
Phoenix
Joined: May 15, 2008
Posts: 724
Location: Twlight Zone
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| Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 1:08 am Post subject: |
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| I do. Whenever unfamialir people start gabbing to me about their kids and their social life I think: "Get away from me you freakin' creep!" I've actualy called them the nastiest things I can think of to make them go away too. I want to get a big scary animal like a tiger or mountaion lion to keep people at bay. My dogs and cat are the only company I need. Go away! |
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earthmonkey
Phoenix
Joined: Jun 06, 2005
Age: 18
Posts: 509
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| Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 2:05 am Post subject: |
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Sometimes I prefer being alone, other times I'd like to be around people. more. Another affect of being around other people, is something that varies: sometimes having people be near me helps me to get things done, but usually only if they're prompting me along the way.
Other times, having someone in the same house as me can be tremendously distracting, and having anyone in my eyesight will be stressful (particularly in evenings at home, when I'd just been alone for a few hours).
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"Public transportation is for jerks and lesbians." --Homer Simpson
"why is it bad for me to discuss why I need the lights off above my desk but it is ok for you to tell me you had a camera shoved up your a#$?" --an aspie coming out |
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Spokane_Girl
I would walk 500 miles and I would walk 500 more
Joined: Jul 17, 2007
Age: 23
Posts: 4212
Location: Benny & Joon town (I wish)
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| Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 2:14 am Post subject: |
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| PunkyKat wrote: | | I do. Whenever unfamialir people start gabbing to me about their kids and their social life I think: "Get away from me you freakin' creep!" I've actualy called them the nastiest things I can think of to make them go away too. I want to get a big scary animal like a tiger or mountaion lion to keep people at bay. My dogs and cat are the only company I need. Go away! |
Can you be nicer than that? How about being civil by telling them you want to be alone by yourself? |
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Chaotica
Granted with powers, gifted with magic
Joined: Jun 29, 2008
Age: 25
Posts: 1326
Location: Hyperborea, buried under the ice and snow
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| Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 4:38 am Post subject: |
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| I like to be alone when working and concentrating on something, sometimes I wish to stay alone in my room like an animal hiding in a lair. But I can't stay for a long time without my family and my boyfriend and I'm really scared to stay lonely in my old age (if I'll reach it, of course). |
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Vimse
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: May 12, 2008
Age: 30
Posts: 71
Location: Norway
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| Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:32 am Post subject: |
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| I live alone and have little human contact. I talk to people maybe 2 or 3 times per month. Don't wish to be alone, just don't know how to interact with people. Get depressed sometimes because of this. |
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Birdgirl
Toucan
Joined: Dec 14, 2007
Age: 19
Posts: 298
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| Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 8:35 am Post subject: |
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Generally speaking, yes.. I'm not so sure about it anymore though. I've isolated myself for so long (though I've maintained a few friends and relationships) that I'm just used to it, I'm not accustomed to being around people on a regular basis. I need a lot of alone time to "recharge" and think, BUT if I'm not careful--if I isolate myself too much I start losing my mind a little. At the same time I can't force myself into going out and being around people, because that can sometimes end up badly, with me just withdrawing even more. It's tiring trying to maintain the right balance.
If I met people that were more like myself and understood me, then maybe this wouldn't be an issue..But these people are rare and when I do find them, they end up leaving/disappearing.
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Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing. - -Shakespeare |
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