| Author |
Message |
Forum: Love and Dating Topic: NT asking for input |
| Europhylia |
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Posted: 19 Jun 2018, 4:43 pm
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Replies: 32
Views: 983
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| And to clarify: He is super lovely. After talking to the ex I feel he does many wonderful things for me that he did not do for her (only because she didn't ask for it and he didn't guess to do it I think) The only thing he won't do is say that he loves me. And obviously that's the one thing you real... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: NT asking for input |
| Europhylia |
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Posted: 19 Jun 2018, 4:37 pm
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Replies: 32
Views: 983
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| Thanks and I do agree with that! I think in part our relationship works fairly well because I'm a German living in the US so being blunt and straight forward as compared to the general population is actually fairly natural to me. Still working out things in this relationship over the last four years... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: NT asking for input |
| Europhylia |
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Posted: 18 Jun 2018, 4:38 pm
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Replies: 32
Views: 983
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| So I have an update! I actually got together with the ex (we have a cordial relationship with each other) to hear her side of the story. He really did wait eight years to marry her and until they were married he did not verbally express his love for her. In fact many of the lovely things he does for... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: NT asking for input |
| Europhylia |
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Posted: 07 Jun 2018, 1:32 pm
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Replies: 32
Views: 983
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I have and his reply is
'I want a partnership also'
It's such an impersonal response. Like it's got nothing to do with me lol.
More reassuring would be: I can totally be that partner to you. No worries. |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: NT asking for input |
| Europhylia |
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Posted: 07 Jun 2018, 11:44 am
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Replies: 32
Views: 983
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| He sounds like he's a good match for you. Perhaps you need to stop looking at it as an investment, and just let things traverse down whatever path destiny has laid out. Look at it this way: what do you think the chances are that you're going to find someone that you'll both fall in love within 6 mo... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: NT asking for input |
| Europhylia |
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Posted: 07 Jun 2018, 9:21 am
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Replies: 32
Views: 983
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| The most important issue might be if you are completely NT in the relationship area yourself, and maybe he is faking things that he doesn't need to fake? That's why he should start out as natural and only fake things that he needs to fake to make you happy. After all, the "autistic" relat... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Endgame |
| Europhylia |
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Posted: 07 Jun 2018, 9:00 am
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Replies: 246
Views: 5,749
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I have never read any of your previous posts. I don't know you or your girlfriend but here's my input as an NT girlfriend:
"hurt people hurt people"
The most likely explanation for her turning from loving and supportive to someone who hurts your feelings is that she feels hurt herself |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: NT asking for input |
| Europhylia |
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Posted: 07 Jun 2018, 8:14 am
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Replies: 32
Views: 983
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| In fact, he seems to be faking a lot of things just to fit in, which is not so good or nice in a relationship. He should be natural in a relationship. From there, you can make mutual agreements on what he needs to handle in a non-natural way so you can get along. I totally agree and worry about tha... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: NT asking for input |
| Europhylia |
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Posted: 07 Jun 2018, 8:03 am
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Replies: 32
Views: 983
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| Argh I just realize I don't even know what love is! Lol (the romantic love versus others thing) Loving a friend to me is actually extremely similar to romantic love minus the sexual attraction. Love to me means I want to bring good to that person's life. I want your life to be better with me in it. ... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: NT asking for input |
| Europhylia |
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Posted: 07 Jun 2018, 6:56 am
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Replies: 32
Views: 983
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| I think that's very possible. He loves the idea of romantic love though! The movie version of it. And he can think of very movie romance things that he enjoys. One time we left a restaurant and it started pouring rain. By the time we got to the car we were drenched! Like dress clinging to my legs we... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: NT asking for input |
| Europhylia |
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Posted: 07 Jun 2018, 5:40 am
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Replies: 32
Views: 983
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| It is strange. I totally agree. And I'm not sure the break would impress him. Lol He would assume that naturally I'm coming back after the break! His ex is gay and she left him a couple of times. He was really surprised when she left him the final time and did not come back. Also from talking to his... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: NT asking for input |
| Europhylia |
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Posted: 06 Jun 2018, 7:07 pm
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Replies: 32
Views: 983
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| I'm more pessimistic. He obviously knows what love feels like because he had trouble getting over his ex, so that will simply not cut it. I also question the claim that love will come with more time together. I think he gets that idea because in his mind (and now confirmed by the ex) he didn't reco... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: NT asking for input |
| Europhylia |
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Posted: 06 Jun 2018, 4:56 pm
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Replies: 32
Views: 983
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| Thanks everybody for your input! I have actually established a fairly friendly relationship with his ex for the benefit of the kids. We've never talked about him before because it didn't seem appropriate. But I approached her today because I figured I really have nothing to lose. The first thing she... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: NT asking for input |
| Europhylia |
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Posted: 06 Jun 2018, 7:50 am
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Replies: 32
Views: 983
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| My ASD :?: boyfriend and I have been together for a little over four years. The beginning was weird and tough mainly because he still seemed so attached to his ex. She was his first girlfriend and he considered her his best friend even though she did some not very friendly things to him and their ki... |
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