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Message |
Forum: The Haven Topic: I want my Androgynous Lifestyle |
| chaotic_descent |
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Posted: 16 Jan 2009, 11:42 pm
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Replies: 74
Views: 13,891
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| I've probably mentioned this awhile back but pretty much my childhood was pretty much sh**e. I hate looking at my baby / childhood pictures and even at myself in the mirror today because I strongly feel that my appearance is not me. I feel that my face is Androgynous. Not only that I look like I'm ... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: LOST. how to get out? motivation & mental disciplines? |
| chaotic_descent |
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Posted: 17 Dec 2008, 10:23 pm
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Replies: 20
Views: 3,581
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| Forget it. This is obviously the wrong place to get help, and I just can't handle anything right now. I've wasted half a year of my life. ahhh, but what's another year onto the pile that's the majority of over a decade of wasted time? I just don't want to die an animal. a pitiful, helpless creature.... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: LOST. how to get out? motivation & mental disciplines? |
| chaotic_descent |
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Posted: 15 Dec 2008, 11:01 am
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Replies: 20
Views: 3,581
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| help. I've been here (this apartment) 5 months. I can't get out. (of this life. it's both behavior and thought.) My messed up sleep isolates me. I'm so frustrated because I know this is all completely avoidable, but I don't have the power to change things. Nobody I know knows how to change things. I... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: I am lost |
| chaotic_descent |
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Posted: 12 Sep 2008, 5:11 am
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Replies: 15
Views: 1,992
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| I'm lost too. I've been mostly in my apartment for the past two and a half months, staying up late and sleeping in all day so that I won't have to deal with the world, even if there might be something positive. and I'm getting tired of the way life is. wasting away, but I can't seem to change. I gue... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: Do we control our own happiness |
| chaotic_descent |
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Posted: 12 Sep 2008, 4:48 am
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Replies: 12
Views: 1,540
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| I think it depends how much control you have to begin with. You have a base potential of 50% self-controlled and 50% societal (uh... I guess. I'm not going to refuse that previous claim someone made, although it may be incorrect or inaccurate despite my repeating it.) but if you've been taught to be... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: LOST. how to get out? motivation & mental disciplines? |
| chaotic_descent |
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Posted: 26 Aug 2008, 2:41 pm
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Replies: 20
Views: 3,581
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| See, goals are meaningless without motivation. I can arbitrarily think up a goal, but I'm not likely to attempt it without the motivation. You need to find things that are meaningful to you, then maybe that will give you motivation. I've been listening to songs on you tube that awaken my sensors to... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: LOST. how to get out? motivation & mental disciplines? |
| chaotic_descent |
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Posted: 26 Aug 2008, 2:03 pm
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Replies: 20
Views: 3,581
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| Chaotic descent, do you have dreams? Tell us about one of your dreams. I wrote down a few goals a while ago... they haven't really helped though... I haven't done anything about them... probably because most of the time I don't really care about them. especially the more realistic ones. I need a dr... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: LOST. how to get out? motivation & mental disciplines? |
| chaotic_descent |
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Posted: 26 Aug 2008, 1:46 pm
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Replies: 20
Views: 3,581
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| These are symptoms of depression. I've had them most of my life to varying degrees. I'm in a bit of an 'up' period right now so I'm not taking my own advice for myself, but I recommend that you get help for depression. If you don't let someone help you, and try to solve things yourself with lots of... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: LOST. how to get out? motivation & mental disciplines? |
| chaotic_descent |
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Posted: 23 Aug 2008, 7:58 pm
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Replies: 20
Views: 3,581
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| all I do is hang on. it's not enough. |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: Cutting self |
| chaotic_descent |
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Posted: 23 Aug 2008, 7:47 pm
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Replies: 9
Views: 1,161
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| destructive habits... it's a way to have control. me, I'm starting to overeat, in addition to staying up all night on the internet and never leaving the house. |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: LOST. how to get out? motivation & mental disciplines? |
| chaotic_descent |
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Posted: 09 Aug 2008, 10:41 pm
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Replies: 20
Views: 3,581
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| no one has any thoughts on the basics required, and if motivation is the very base requirement to get anything done? Hey I feel the same as you, I've lost my motivation for life. For me what I need to do is write a plan on what I need to do and follow it. Break the plan into smaller steps and concer... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: Parents have basically given up on me; Not sure what to do |
| chaotic_descent |
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Posted: 07 Aug 2008, 11:09 am
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Replies: 5
Views: 1,829
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| It's REALLY hard to make sense of life when parents act crazy. It's not your fault, and I know it's difficult not to follow the example set by parents, but try not to get sucked into the craziness. Don't buy into the whole victim VS perpetrator mentality in either direction. Try to find sanity in ot... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: Am I ever going to be able to get enough sleep? |
| chaotic_descent |
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Posted: 07 Aug 2008, 10:12 am
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Replies: 21
Views: 1,916
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| Well, you're probably in pretty bad shape, but keep hunting around... there's always a good deal to be had. I was rooming with a guy who kept farmer's hours, and I woke him up from the smallest noises even while he slept with earplugs. but he had control issues. it wasn't enough that I was quiet, I ... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: LOST. how to get out? motivation & mental disciplines? |
| chaotic_descent |
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Posted: 07 Aug 2008, 9:41 am
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Replies: 20
Views: 3,581
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| I figured out that I enjoy fighting and challenging myself. Not me. I find it grueling. It's like dealing with a disobedient child, and I can't handle that! I don't know. I think it's my dissociation*. I've been thinking perhaps I should be working with it instead of trying to fight it. Maybe I'm s... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: LOST. how to get out? motivation & mental disciplines? |
| chaotic_descent |
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Posted: 07 Aug 2008, 6:13 am
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Replies: 20
Views: 3,581
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| tl;dr: What are the building blocks for finding yourself and no longer being lost? I'm lost. I have no sense of control, motivation, sense of self, sense of the world. I don't know the way "out" of being lost. The past month (since I moved out of a place with a crazy roommate into my own apartment) ... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: need tools for shaping my day/life and avoiding depression |
| chaotic_descent |
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Posted: 06 Apr 2007, 3:20 am
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Replies: 2
Views: 752
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| Every time I ask about this, people seem to casually brush it aside as if it's the wrong question, like "oh you just do life, you don't think about it or plan it or try to understand it." It really infuriates me because I spend a lot of days wasting my time on the internet, thinking "what should I b... |
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