Hi I am new and have so many questions

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Jimmy m, thanks ... and wow.

I have read a bunch of places that Aspergers has been defined out of existence in the US which makes no sense to me if it is really different from high functioning autism. But from what you write they are truly different.

I need to think about all of this a lot more. My head is sort of exploding. Not necessarily in a bad way though. Just more of a ... OMG so this is me, who knew?

I am not a believer in using drugs to combat many of the mental issues associated with Aspergers. I feel it damages the unique brains that we have. It might be a short term fix but a long term disaster. That is my personal opinion.



I am not too sure that therapy will help with this problem. In dealing with this type of issue the goal is to be "guarded but not paranoid".



Let me explain a little about the differences between male and female Aspie traits. I will explain this in generalities rather than absolutes because we are all different. Females tend to use social masking to a larger degree than males. They look at the actions of their peer group and try and mirror their reactions. This masking takes quite a bit of effort and they feel hollow inside because they are merely reflections of others. Over time the stress of trying to social mirror the actions of others wears them down and they commonly experience a variety of mental anomalies such as depression, anxiety, bi-polar, trauma etc. Another difference can be described as follows: young male Aspies are sometimes referred to as "little professors" whereas young females are sometimes referred to as "little psychologist". Females are drawn to the study of psychology and the inner workings of the mind.

Caution: If you are very sensitive in general, it is likely you are very sensitive to medications also. There is a book about managing healthcare and meds for ASD (esp. the sensitive ones). Before I knew about my ASD, based on a reaction I had, a nurse advised me to tell other nurses that "I metabolize medicine differently". In college, I was put on an anti-depressant and it made me manic; then I was put on the lowest dosages of mood stabilizers with it and they took the edge off but then I was "functionally" depressed. Withdrawal make me "acutely" so. No thank you. I am looking for alternate ways to take the edge off. Also, my kidney function was stage 1 renal failure, but nobody would believe the lowest "clinical dosages" could cause that, but my kidney function coincidentally recovered in full when I stopped the meds. I don't necessarily regret those years of meds, but be aware of the risks to sensitive and/or ASD types.

LOL. My PhD is in psychology. Seriously! But not clinical etc and mental health is not something I am any more knowledgeable about than a layperson. I used to do research on acquisition of computer skill. But I have been out of that for a long time, and my job is very computer-centric.

What you say about meds is my gut feeling. I have always avoided them, and I have atypical reactions to many drugs. I can't take painkillers for example as they make me sick to my stomach.

I also fake it all the time and am conscious that I am doing that. So "masking" as you say. And as you say, it is draining. It is a real eye opener to me and a relief to finally understand that this is what it is. E.g. I have always described my work clothes as a "costume" and I mean that literally ... it is what I wear to act like a grownup. And sometimes I get lost in that and start to wonder what is really "me" and which part is just the act. It is hard.

I am sort of feeling a disintegration/reintegration right now which is a little unnerving but not really bad. Like looking through a telescope and suddenly the blurry things are coming into focus.

SharonB, crossposted .. and yes as I just wrote I have atypical reactions to meds. I feel like everyone here is a mind reader as you are anticipating everything I am saying.

I am generally leery of drugs in general. Especially as I really only feel that bad occasionally. It is not ruining my life. So I think I am answering my own question here ... prob. not a good thing for me. Might be for others and that is ok but not for me.

Right there with you. Your statements resonate with me. The mind reading is mutual. I'm the "youngest" 40-some year old that I know - but yet wise also... if I could own it.

I take beta blockers for high blood pressure. It also helps with anxiety.

CatieCar, one of the problems you articulated was panic attacks. If you are interested I am willing to pass onto you a method for ending panic attacks. At the moment I have a house full of my children and my grandchildren celebrating the holidays. But after they leave, I would be willing to describe this technique to you. I am not sure you will ever read this in a book, so it is not common knowledge. Just let me know and I will post it in this thread after the holidays.