My pain has a name

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Hi,

I'm 55 and believed for most of my life that I was ADHD, though I knew I was different, even from them. Back in the 1960's I was a patient at the UCLA Nero-Psychiatric Institute and diagnosed with a brain dysfunction - whatever that meant. No one knew and ultimately, no one cared.

Several months ago, my 18 year old nephew was officially diagnosed with Asperger's and I had long since remarked to my brother that he was the same as me. Since my brother remember this (it held a lot of significance to him), he had to tell me. I'm glad he did and miserable with the news. After doing a bunch of research and taking St. John's Wort for a couple months, there is no doubt whatsoever in my mind that Asperger's is exactly what I have, or more accurately, that I am a high functioning autistic.

While there are other things, what finally convinced me were two things: first, the St. John's Wort really makes it easier to not get upset and second, my desire/need to repeat things I like.

Right now I'm unemployed and have been for several years as I can't seem to hold a job anymore. In debt and behind to the point I'm getting sued. Behind on my taxes, which prevents me from declaring bankruptcy and to top it off, my conviction that I'm autistic has me depressed - I can barley function.

Prior to my brother telling me about the Asperger's, I was able to make $400-$600 a month playing poker. Since then, I only seem to lose.

I just don't know what to do anymore.

Jay

PS. While I am depressed, I suppose it's not as bad as I implied. Still, this sucks.

Welcome to WP!

To WrongPlanet!! !

Hi, you've come to a good place. You are still processing a lot of things and it's only natural to feel overwhelmed. I hope you will benefit and enjoy talking to people who experience life like you do. This is a nice place for support or education and also just to talk. Welcome home.

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hello, JayK-
i am not as smart as you - no way could i play poker- you are very high-functioning, IMO. you are losing only because you are feeling bereft. i believe that i have been in a similar place as where you are at. i have been close to bankrupcy, but saved by my parents. i suggest you consider some form of bankrupcy, use the legal system to help yourself, there are public services in this regard. i have been homeless - it is grim but there are worse things, believe it or not. i have hit rock-bottom, and DSHS was able to help me. there are still social programs in today's america, even after 8 years of you-know-who. i am sure it can help you as well. on the bright side social security is only 7 years away.

Welcome to WrongPlanet.

Hello JayK, welcome, enjoy your stay on the Wrong Planet!