So what do I do now?....

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Just found/visited/posted for the first time now at WP. Basically, I've known I was different for as long as I can remember. I never fit in much of anywhere. I've only had maybe 5 close friends in my life. Mom left when i was 12 and my dad was an a**hole (ironically i'd bet the farm that he has AS or some other form of HFA) but my two closest friends were and still are my two brothers. the 4 of us are different. get told how "odd" "different" "weird" "difficult" "rude" "insensitive" we are. but i heard about AS a few years ago when they used the term to describe the titular character on the TV show House M.D. (someone that, ironically, i identify with). well i glanced it over but didn't put in much time. I dated a lot growing up, but never really had a lot of relationships that lasted longer than a couple of weeks. i was fairly charming by imitating others. but it never lasted long. then i met my future wife. we connected on a level i never did with anyone else but my brothers. (she could have some form of HFA as well but definitely not AS) we've been together for 12 years and have 2 beautiful daughters. well i started to notice differences in them with all our friends children that made them somewhat socially awkward. However, I'm not here about them. Not yet at least. The differences in them were behaviors i've always had and just learned to adapt to "fit in". well as much as i love my wife and kids, i cant help but notice the longer my relationship continue the more I'm "breaking down". With my friends, coworkers, kids, wife. I/m not constantly referred to as "out there", difficult, and "vance isn't like anyone else, he's just f****d up in the head". Meaning I feel like Dexter Morgan. If you watch the show he pretends to be normal to fit into society when he's in fact a serial killer. well that's how i feel, homicidal tendencies aside. But the "act" is crumbling down now that I'm 31 years old. I can't just keep pretending that I'm "normal". so i finally decided to try and figure out what the hell was wrong with me before going to see a "shrink". so i stumble back on to AS. Taking a serious look at it, its hard to imagine I'll be given any other diagnosis as i did the percentage on it and I have 89% of all signs and symptoms. More specifically it felt like I was reading my own biography. Then I took the online AAA Test and on 2 different ones I scored 32 and 37 (35 being typical AS ground....but I guess you all already know that). Then I did wasn't easy and sat down with my wife and went over everything I found. She agreed 100%. Now I'm reading post after post on WP shocked to see how anyone else could possibly understand what I go through on a daily basis. Which lead me here. What do I do now? They way my brain works and plenty of AS people will understand now that the Question has been asked.....I have to know the answer for sure.

So where do I start? what kind of doctor should I see?

Any help and advice would be appreciated. As Im relieved to finally feel like I'm not alone, but Im more than overwhelmed about where to go from here.

Thanks,
Vance

Usually Consult your family doctor, asking for a referral to a psychometrist,

Usually insurance covers the cost,

The ultimate goal is to be accomadated,

There's great books, and plenty of options, if you find a well resourced psychometrist,

(1) Written Manual for Autistic Spectrum Disorder http://en.wikibooks.org/wiki/A_survival ... c_spectrum

(2) Great Ted talks with great minds, reaching a few spectrums, http://blog.ted.com/2011/08/25/playlist ... -of-minds/

Vance, what you say sounds so familiar. Believe me, you are not alone. My own path went like this: friend refers me to WP, recognize my AS, get formal diagnosis, read everything I can, adjust my life and surroundings to facilitate interraction.

There! Now that wasn't so hard, was it? Well, yes, it sorta took a long time. For example, I waited 2 years in line to get a bullet-proof diagnosis from the hospital. I needed that because everybody has their own ideas about AS and I don't want it to be questioned by every therapist I may happen to meet. It gets me off Square One for good.

There are a lot of really good books out there. For sensory overload (and how to fix it) the most helpful was Too Loud Too Bright Too Fast Too Tight -

http://www.amazon.com/Loud-Bright-Fast- ... 465&sr=1-1

That was a great place to start to change my physical environment so that I fit better and as a result I'm more relaxed.

The greatest thing I found was a weighted blanket. It's filled with poly-pellets so it isn't warm, just has weight. Mine weighs 20 pounds. Even if I'm close to melt-down, I get under that blanket and *instantly* I'm human again. Somebody told me it has to do with the long muscles in the body.

The very best thing I did was hang around WrongPlanet, finding people who are just like me, and "get it" - at WP, you don't have to pretend to be anybody else.

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

Thanks everyone especially Claradoon. couple of questions for you as I can tell we relate. I don't want to beat around the bush. i know with my anxiety the longer it takes to recieve a well informed diagnose of myself the more stressed i will become and possibly give up. How did you go about going to the Hospital to get the solid dx? I don't have a primary care Doctor. So would you just recomend call the hospital and make and appointment or find a pcp first?

thanks again, i still wish i had the words to describe how great it feels to have someone instantly relate to you and you to them. its very sureal.

Vance

I'm glad you found us, Vance.

You need a Referral to a Psychiatrist.

Now let me qualify that. A Referral you need from a family doctor and you don't have one. Therefore, try an open clinic?

Before I forget, you're going to need a family doctor. My process is that the psychiatrist diagnoses, prescribes, and kicks me back to my own family doctor. Then the psychiatrist becomes a consultant, which means he'll never see me again. My family doctor will consult with the psychiatrist if things get very wrong.

So - if you can get to a family doctor at an open clinic, maybe ask if there's a doctor that would take you on. I started from a community clinic.

Now here's the thing: you want to find out what institution is the highest authority in Asperger's, aka high-functioning autism. Since it's in the DSM (Diagnostic Symptom ...?) anyway that makes it a mental problem. On paper, it is. And it's paper you're trying to get, so even if it's false, follow the yellow brick road, i.e. do it their way.

So you'll do whatever research is necessary to find out what you want your Referral to say. Step 1 - Name of hospital or institution.
Step 2 - Name of psychiatrist.
Step 3 - What you want them to test you for (Asperger's)

Warning: *Never* tell a doctor what to do! They feel obliged to disagree. Be very backwards about coming forward, but have the info ready. Handy phrases: "Do you think ..." or "I was wondering ..." etc.

One way to dig up info on autism doctors is to call a Children's Hospital, ask for the Autism Dept., and then ask if they'll see an adult or can they tell you where else you could try?

Don't be put off the waiting period - a year anyway. But it'll come and you won't be sorry.

My "certificate" is on the letterhead of the hospital, has the date and ToWhomItMayConcern, says that I was tested by Dr.X. Then it has the exact defintion of Asperger's from the DSM.
After that, there's one line: "A diagnosis of Asperger's Disorder is Warranted." And the signature.

So you see, there's nothing revealing there at all. I'm still very pleased with it.

Good luck, and keep in touch!

thanks. im pretty new to all this. but no bs, i just spent 11,372 straight days knowing that i was special but fearing i wasnt "right in the head" as i've always been told. in the last 24 hours, i feel my 1st day of a brand new life. there's no way that im not AS. i feel it more strongly than any belief ive ever had simply by reading the forums asking people if i was dreaming and to pinch me. cause its as if i wrote it myself. a sense of belonging that ive desired but lacked for 31 years sudden just arrived. and i've never breathed better. so thanks for all the help.

come to think of it, i actually do have a family doctor. he treats me for my ADHD (yeah i thought that was the only problem i had...lol.) so maybe i should talk to him.

thanks again!! !
Vance

welcome to wrong planet

Welkome to WP

Mick