Hi - thanks for this amazing place

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I've been married for over 25 years to an Aspie. Dh was 35 when we married and back then, of course, guys were just called nerds; mothers doted on their sons (especially onlies) doing all their chores; Ivy League schools were male only and as part of dorm fees, laundry was included. This cosseted existence allowed brains and interests to develop - a situation light years removed from how education is approached now. Of course, there are many downsides to that approach, too.

Our ds just turned 12 last weekend and has inherited AS. Middle school is a nightmare and we are having huge problems getting him out of the door to go. Gifted kids get lost in the mix because school districts don't want to put resources into them until the kids have been driven into acute anxiety episodes or depression because of a)clueless b)heartless c)obfuscating administrators (depends on the day which selection I feel like choosing).

In my view, AS is more like a cultural competency issue. It is not a disability but a differing way of looking at the universe. Society should not expect Aspies to learn how to behave and only behave as NTs. It's got to be on some middle ground that NTs learn to respect all that aspies have to offer which will lead to an easier time for aspies to follow NT norms for X % of time.

Thanks for sharing your insights. They are truly invaluable as I try to help my son realize how special he is after the school crushed him this year.

noreen

public schools are terrible. I'm 32 and only just found out I'm an aspie, which explains ALOT, but anyway had a terrible time in school. It is sad that you have as much trouble with teachers and administrators sometimes as the other children. When I was in 8th grade, a teacher actually told a cousin of mine that he thought I was on drugs and needed serious help. He based this soley on how I dressed and that I was "antisocial" (quiet and didn't join in with other kids)! !

Given your(In my opinion),healthy attitude about AS,your son has a positive future ahead of him.I wish society would have the same attitude taught by their "supposed" spiritual leader...JC.People should not be throwing stones(or trying to change everyone into themselves)before they look at their own flaws.I believe this is expressed better by my "sig"......"Just because one plane is flying out of formation doesnt mean the formation is on course."Why try and make the "off course" plane conform to the flight of the majority,when that course appears to be headed into a mountain?

Welcome to WP!

Tim

Welcome greenreen,

Things have changed for worse and for better. Check out the Kid's Crater. More showing up every day, they do well together, and skills learned to transfer. Kids do explain things to kids well.

Good luck on teaching NTs to behave. Most are OK, but a small percent, hopeless.

I found this place an eye opener, it explains lots.

The kids are good, and the young teens helpful and supporting. Get your son an account.

There are two Austrailian boys, seven and eight who will question him about dinosaurs, and a girl of ten looking for someone to talk to, got to learn to talk to girls sometime.

School is often a bummer, but it is a second class planet. Hang in and enjoy.

Welcome to WP!

Hello from the president (and only member) of the UOPHA council. Feel free to PM me with any questions .

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Hi, Noreen and you're welcome!

Welcome to you too!