Autistic @ 80

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Hello fellow odd folks. I must be a late bloomer since I’m just now beginning to understand why I live in a world of strangers. Maybe some of you would like to be friends who don’t need me to explain myself.

Welcome to WP and thank you for joining

Hi Liza, welcome to the planet

Hi Lisaloop Welcome to wrong planet , usually no one here asks for you to justify yourself , having a diagnosis of Autism is a plus , but plenty of folk here , are either just suspicious of possibly having that diagnosis or have done a online test.
From a fellow odd folkster .Congadulations on making it to 80 yrs old , if that what was implied by your introduction.?

Just being yourself is lovely. And scary sometimes.

Hope you feel at home here.

Welcome to WP! I hope you like it here.

And...80?!

If you were about 80 years old when you were diagnosed as being on the Autism Spectrum, WOW!

I was diagnosed two days before my 65th birthday and that was cutting it close. The assorted hints that nudged me into getting an adult autism assessment would not have been available much after that. And without those hints I would never have even suspected I was on the Autism Spectrum and so it would never have occurred to me to get a formal Autism Assessment.

So:

As a psychologist, I'm interested in how the experiences of being an undiagnosed neurodivergent person have influenced our ability to navigate being an old person. Here are some examples from my own life.

1) I tend to be intolerant of small talk. This means I don't like sitting around with a bunch of old fuddy duddies discussing the weather, our aches and pains, or gossip about the neighbors. I dread going to the senior center. I used to think this impatience was just the result of being bright. But I see plenty of very intelligent NeuroTypicals who can enjoy such conversations. It seems like my intolerance is making it even more difficult not be isolated and lonely as I age. Have you figured out how to locate older people who think like you do?

2) When my ex-husband and I went to a party he would dash into the group and begin interacting with everybody. I stood at the door having no idea how to include myself. As I get older this social anxiety seems to be increasing. I even dread going to see a doctor. Are you experiencing more reluctance to see people? How do you cope with this?

3) Opposition to doing what other people tell me to do has always been a problem. Now I seem resistant even to what I tell myself: "Do the dishes"..."NO. I don't want to." Self-care is getting harder. Is this happening for you?

4) I used to bite my nails, pick scabs, and chew my cuticles constantly. In adulthood I've learned a number of meditation and self-talk techniques that help me control these behaviors. While I'm still stimming, the urge seems to be decreasing as I get older. Are you seeing changes in yourself?

I know lots of us have these kinds problems throughout life. There's a lot being said and written about how to deal with them in childhood and middle age. I'm asking you to tell us about your experience as an older autistic. Do the issues change? Is anything better or easier? Are you facing more or different challenges? Please share.

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