Do you hate being told off at work?

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I'm not a goodie-goodie who tries to do everything right because sometimes I find myself extending my break by 5 minutes, or other little things like that. But one thing, I don't like being told off. It always leaves me feeling stupid afterwards, especially if I wasn't intending to do anything that I knew could result in getting into trouble. I think it's due to social phobia and low self-esteem (both I have got).

Yesterday at work they tested the fire alarm at a particular time, and afterwards two of my colleagues came running up to me and one said (in quite a stressy way) ''you was supposed to be outside the main entrance when the fire alarm was tested.'' I didn't know what to say, my voice sounds all monotonous when I'm feeling stupid, because I do remember being told a few weeks ago when I first started the job what to do when the fire alarm goes. So I said ''oh, sorry, I will next time.'' I said it in such an unconfident way, saying each word extremely clearly, which I don't normally talk like otherwise. When they went again, I kind of stood there feeling tearful (but I didn't cry). Also I could imagine people moaning about me when they were all outside the main entrance, like going ''where is she? She was told about this, so there's no reason for her not to come.''
Then about an hour later, the same person that told me off actually said that she got really told off for swearing earlier. That made me feel a bit better because I thought to myself, ''well, I suppose we all get told off sometimes then, it's not just me.''

How do you feel when you feel you are being lectured or told off at work? Does it make you feel low, like you don't do anything right? Or do you try your hardest to just let it ride over you?

I can relate. I'm quite a perfectionist but like everyone else I do make mistakes from time to time.

It makes me feel stupid for not preventing the mistake and it generally ruins the rest of the day for me, even though the people I work with are pleased to have me and generally don't mind if anyone makes a mistake as long as things get fixed. I wish I could let it go as easily as they can.

I pretty much just try to not really react at all and follow any instructions given, even if they end up being unhelpful. Mostly when it happens I feel like it's a violation of what I was already doing, which goes into 'switching tasks, not doing what I was doing' territory-- haven't been able to overcome this and I probably appear indignant when spoken to in that manner.

I basically hate it because I can't stand it when people are upset with me for anything, so I try very hard to be perfect and that usually doesn't work lol

This is an interesting one, I have to say. I react in a very similar way to others in this thread.

This is something that happens on a daily basis for me, but not through intended mis-behaviour, but a lack of understanding of communication sent from colleagues/managers.

For example, if someone sends out an e-mail and states that something is "not required", my understanding is that it is not mandatory. Then being told that I've been making mistakes (for including this additional information) (I am a perfectionist to the point of a robotic structure), makes me feel awful because I didn't realise that they actually meant that "not required" means "don't do it".

When I am told off or told that Ive done something wrong, I withdraw from the rest of the team. I do feel sorry for them having to put up with me because they must think I am very difficult to work with. When I withdraw, I never react verbally. I become extremely quiet, and refuse to talk to anyone, sometimes for days at a time.

If my depressive state is s due to being told that Ive done something incorrect in my work, I constantly go over it. If it is a schoolboy error so-to-speak, I accept and move on. But for most other things I think about the error, and look through previous e-mails obsessively to see if I have been given conflicting information. If so, I challenge it, but then again I am told that it is because I have "mis-interpreted" the communication.

When I am withdrawn I am usually taken into a room and given a talking to. The first thing I am asked us "what is the problem? - it is clear that it is something that has been said". This makes me feel very uncomfortable; I can't exactly say that it is because of the way something has been said, I say it is due to not understanding, whereby she asks things like "what is there not to understand?" and "how would you word that differently?" I usually answer that question well but then after coming back in to the room she immediately sends out another email clarifying, which makes no use to me as I had already been explained what was meant previously. Maybe she is just putting it in writing but when people see it is a result of me coming out of the meeting it makes me feel stupid because everyone must be thinking "why doesn't he understand?".

I have been told off for forgetting to say good morning to people when I arrive and was also told by management that other colleagues have made it known that "Nukey is really rude". I don't want to be rude. I like making people happy. It is in my nature.

My situation has gotten so bad, I had needed to take time off work to recover from the social and depression issues that I have suffered from as a result of mis-communication.

Until my official diagnosis (which I am in a 18 month queue for - 6 months to go), my employer stated they can not make any adjustments for me on grounds of disability. So it looks like there are six months to go.

Nukey

Why had the staff to be outside when they tested the fire bell? Was it just a standard fire bell test, which they should be doing every week anyway, to make sure it's working? Why would you have to be outside for that? Or was this supposed to be a fire drill? If so, why did they pre-warn the staff that it was going to happen? That would defeat the purpose of the drill. Sorry, that's not what your thread's about, but I think there are some procedural anomalies in your workplace, which don't seem right.