21 and Never Had Job

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To introduce myself,

I get very anxious when thinking about social situations (to the point where I will lose sleep) and I have supremely poor social skills (due to lack of wit/quick thinking + anxiety causing me to second guess what I have to say before I say it). As a result I'm deprived of sleep, socially incapable and miserable whenever I make even minor social outings (such as going shopping).

To add to that I'm 21 and haven't worked since I was 15, so I have 0 relevant work experience to put on a resume.

So I'm wondering what would be the best course I should take in finding a job. I have no doubt that I'm not qualified to work anywhere except a fast food restaurant and even at that I'm not confident that I'd get hired. Currently my only idea is to learn how to make donairs and then to apply at a donair restaraunt nearby, so that I can write on my resume that one of my skills is donair preparation. Does this sound like a reasonable plan? Is there anything else I can do to improve my situation? Need help here.

And thank you for any replies - I really appreciate it.

A good place to start is by volunteering at an organization you're interested in. Volunteering will help you gain experience that you can put on your resume.

Another thing you can do is to look for agencies that will support you in getting employment...in Ontario, Canada, we have a provincially funded program where there are job coaches that will help you in every step of the process. Depending on where you live there may be a similar service through local government, or through non-profit organizations. Goodwill also runs programs that will help prepare you for employment through paid work experience in their stores.

As for your anxiety, it's all about exposure. The more you get out into the community and gain new experiences, the less anxious you'll become around other people.

If you have anxiety issues meds may help. I have ADHD (diagnosed) and am an aspie (self-diagnosed). I take Wellbutrin and it's helped my anxiety tons and I feel motivated to do stuff. It may not be a bad thing. Or another thing you could do is find some natural remedy for stress/anxiety (Stress-J by Natures Sunshine comes to mind and works great).

As far as getting experience, the abovesaid temp agencies are a great way to do that. Start small and just take what they give you and maybe work toward the job you want (i.e. if you want IT, fix computers on the side for super cheap).

HTH

i'm 24, although i've had jobs before they were very short-term jobs, so not much job experience, both 4 years apart

I have/had lots of anxiety & didn't get my 1st job till after I was 21 too. I didn't feel I could really do anything well due to physical disabilities as well as my anxiety. I was seeing psychs & taking meds for different things including anxiety but they weren't really helping my anxiety any & they may of been making my other issues worse. My 1st job was a dish-washer & I really didn't feel I could do it well due to having low vision & some color blindness & a tremor disorder that acts up when doing things with fine-motor skills; add to that problems processing fast-paced stuff, loud noises, not handling stress well & my skin being sensitive to chemicals. I took it because an organization I was working with that was funded by my voc rehab lined it up for me. I hated it a lot of the time but I did that for 10months. I dealt with my anxiety & stress by staying very focused on the task I was doing & making sure it was done rite; I have OCD. A couple mangers said I was the best dish-washer they ever had & I was liked by all the good workers despite being awkward. I left when I got hired on at WalMart after doing the dish-washing thing for 10months. WalMart hired me to stock but I was transferred over to floor-cleaning/maintenance after 4 days due to problems stocking because of my vision & tremors & I did that for 25months. I was very anxious for a while but my social anxiety slowly got better & I still get nervous in social situations but I can deal with it. It's very good aware of your limitations or problems with employment or other things because of your anxiety & other issues but try not to let them limit you too much. You might could deal with it better than you think you can now or they could get a little better.

If your seeing any docs or psychs or other professionals about your anxiety or any other issues; they might be able to help advise you about employment or refer you to an agency or someone else who might be able to help. Getting invulved with something like a charity might be good to get some expedience, network & you can think of it as a transition phase before you get a real job You can quit if you have problems & it will be a growing experience for you. MrObvious mentioned medication & I'm not going to tell you if you should try that route or not but you should research things if you want to consider it. anti-depressants(the SSRI class), benzopines & Buspar(which is what I'm on for anxiety now & it's the only med that has helped me with it) are the main types of anxiety meds if you want to research.