Terrible situation at work

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I had the worst conversation at work yesterday; it was bad enough I feel like my career might be over.

To give a bit of background, the last three months I've been working as a project manager for a mental health agency. Although I'm technically a contractor and not an employee, meaning that I'm paid by the project and not by salary, my supervisor, the director of the agency, has assured me that they'll be continuing to employ me this way until they can make my position permanent. In fact, I just received a new contract for a new project starting next month on top of my current one, which is encouraging.

This leaves me with a complex situation as someone managing a staff of half a dozen people but also not a part of the formal management structure. My ineptness in handling this situation may have just cost me my job.

I was in the area of one of our satellite offices yesterday since I had errands to do in the area and decided to stop by and meet the people who worked there during "open hours," which is when the building opens to the general public to meet and talk to each other and the people who work there. I met the director there for the first time and she agreed to sit down for a brief talk about the office.

I thought what I was asking was innocuous.

"What are the most significant programs you have out of this office?"

"How can we better support you out of the main office?"

"Has there been any interest in new projects you'd like to have funding for?"

Things went fine for a few minutes before she became agitated. "You're asking all these intimate questions and I've never met you before." "I don't understand how telling you anything would make a difference." She was so angry, it was all over her face and her voice was getting so terse. I'm not even sure where it started, but something must have set her off.

I felt horrible, all I could think of to do is apologize and tell her I didn't mean to upset her, and try to explain myself. From her perspective, I can see someone half her age coming into her casual office in a suit and tie asking questions that sound like they should be coming the director. I was overstepping my bounds, perhaps; my original thought was that, as part of my job is to get funding for projects, I should make myself aware of what the agency's needs are.

I guess I was wrong in this case. I wish she had just told me why she was upset so I could address it, but people never tell you that. I've had a pit in my stomach that she's going to call my supervisor up and I'm going to lose my job.

This is probably all too vague, but if anyone could help me understand the situation at all I'd really appreciate it right now. It's been a day and I still feel physically ill.

Last edited by bakattsura on 13 Sep 2011, 2:52 pm, edited 1 time in total.

If these topics are something you can actually do something about, you should be fine as long as you introduced yourself and stated to her that you were trying to get a feel for conditions in the field. I see nothing there that would get you fired. You had nothing to apologize for.

I always wondered what it would of been like if i had volunteered for the other position I was hired in at.

Unless there was something hostile about your tone of voice or body language (and I wouldn't imagine there was), then I think she overreacted. Maybe she was just feeling overworked or overwhelmed by her job to begin with before you arrived and that caused her to feel defensive at your questions?

I work for a social services agency and have had auditors and outside consultants ask similar questions before. I would think most program administrators would be used to that sort of thing and realize you're just trying to do your job, not to mention help their agency stay afloat by finding funding.

Is it possible that there has been misunderstanding/miscommunication on both sides? With the current economic situation a lot of charities and organisations which assist people with disabilities/social issues/whatever are having their funding reduced or cut altogether. Maybe she thought that was the purpose behind your questions?

I too have a feeling this is what may have caused her reaction. I have worked in situations where outside agencies were tasked to sort internal situations out and have witnessed that same reaction many times before. I can't see what you have done wrong, perhaps you parked in her parking spot or something.

I tend to agree with the others. We are often advised that other people's negative reactions to us sometimes have nothing to do with us or anything we've done, but rather come from that person dealing with stresses we are unaware of. Unless there's some part of the story that's been left out, I think this may be one of those cases.

Thanks, everyone. I'm starting to feel a bit better about it, now.

It's easy to default to assuming that fault always lies with me. This does not serve me well.