My 7yr old won't tie up her jacket

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I am back, sorry its been a while, have just been busy as its start of October School holidays.

First things first, I am from Scotland, some strange words or phrases get used here. None of you would know that "fit like" means "how are you", " bairn" means "child", " you ken" means "you know", there are hundreds more.

Next, I really didn't realise that the way I word a sentence can confuse a child or even adults.

I say " is bad for" which does indeed, as one or two pointed out, mean has a bad habit so when I said "my girl is bad for not tying her jacket when asked" that is translated as "my girl has A BAD HABIT, which is that she won't tie (fasten or zip) her jacket".

Anyway, my girl is wanting a new winter jacket which has a zip only and has promised to fasten it up when she gets one.

Any idea on what winter jacket to get her ?

Hi,

My son 8 feels the cold a lot less than I do and when I was a kid I felt the cold less than I do now, but even now I prefer jackets/hoodies/sweaters (jumpers!) that have a front opening so I can unzip them if I get too hot. Personally I just let it go when my son doesn't wear a coat, I just carry it with me. If I know it's going to be freezing, I make him wear a high quality base layer that isn't too hot indoors but has great insulating properties.

She's probably not going to get ill from not having her coat zipped up and if she gets quite cold she'll zip up the coat herself.

Not everything is a 'sensory' issue - it may simply be a 'preference' issue. And kids preferences should be respected so long as it's not dangerous, disrespectful, etc.

Choosing a coat? Hard one. At my rugby club I have to help clean out the equipment shed once a year. Each year, I manage to find an abandoned coat in my son's size. Got a really good one this year.

Ok, with winter fast approaching, I think ots time to bump this topic up.

Wintertime here can be really freezing, unpleasant and sometimes windy too so I can't just "leave her to zip her own jacket when she gets cold" as thst may danger her health.

I think the other best option is probably finding out if she has other sensory issues (They are not the same as motor skill issues--and cannot be easily tested for) that explain why she does not like the coat. There maybe something that makes it feel very unpleasant and may be you could make adaptations, like letting her not zip it up to the top ---wearing something underneath it but over her clothes, or see if there is another jacket she could wear that would be more comfortable.

If a usually compliant girl is not complying with this rule, then there is likely a very good reason but you may have to be a bit of a reason to discover what it is. You could ask her at a time when far from when this coat issue arises why she does it at school and not home, but she may or may not be able to articulate it, depending on her communication skills.

You may need to take her shopping for a new coat. Let her try on a bunch of different ones, and practice zipping/buttoning/tying them. Have her walk around a little in them. Ask her lots of questions to try and determine if there's anything she finds uncomfortable about them. If she picks one, keep the receipt for a few weeks just in case another problem arises.

Sorry, I saw the second new reply and not the first from the OP.

I agree with everyone who said take her shopping and let her try things on. Pay attention to what she can tolerate/can't tolerate/likes. Buying off the Internet (not that you suggested it) is not going to work unless you find the exact same thing in a store and she likes it in person, first.

My son -hates- that ubiquitous fleece, fuzzy, woolly-feeling lining, and so we look for coats with a smooth lining. We also give his neck enough room to not feel compressed. He won't wear a scarf, but our weather does not require it.

If your child can tolerate a loosely draping scarf (also check the texture of it on her) I would add that to the ensemble so she does not have to zip it all the way up, if it bothers her.

Coat shopping was a big pain for us, so I don't promise it will be easy. It may be hard to find something she will tolerate. I think we had to try 3 shops, last time. On the plus side, you will learn a lot about her sensory issues which could help in the future, also.