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Feels like he is existing in a fantasy world...

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ellemenope
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31 Mar 2015, 7:52 am

momsparky wrote:
This is actually a real intervention: unfortunately it doesn't work for DS, but several social workers have asked us if we can pair him with a kid a couple years younger. Good for you for fostering it! The key with social skills is that they need to learn them, but they have a different pace - not respecting their pace and rhythm of learning is where a lot of the stress kids on the spectrum comes from.


Deciding to have another child was a really big deal for us. Before I became pregnant we had been very certain about my son's ASD for about 6 months although he wasn't diagnosed till later. I wasn't sure if I could handle another child with an ASD but I knew my son would make a great brother no matter what and that (of course) we would love another child with every fibre of our beings. It certainly did occur to us that a sibling would be a really helpful aid to my son, as well as a built-in BFF (hopefully) and it has turned out better than we had ever hoped. There were many times when my daughter was very young that I honestly thought it was a huge mistake having her while having to deal with the challenges of caring for my son... but I think most parents with more than one go through that.
Now I am thankful every day that we took the plunge and made the careful decision to have another. They are both amazing for each other and they benefit each other in so many ways. We're doing everything we can to foster a good sibling relationship between them and I'm crossing my fingers and hoping that it will continue to go so well. It makes me extremely happy to see how much they love, support and understand each other even at this early stage.



ellemenope
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31 Mar 2015, 7:56 am

zette wrote:
Read Parenting Your Aspergers Child by Alan Sohn. He has a whole section about kids who are mainly in fantasy land, though the book is mainly about school age children so the suggestions won't be helpful for a few years. Aspergers and Young Children is a good one for the preschool years.

My son had very little interest in other kids at age 4. It has slowly developed over the last 5 years, and now he has real friends and play dates and even plays with the neighborhood kids. I tried very hard to set up play dates in the early years, but all efforts flopped. If I could have seen then how he would grow socially on his own schedule, I would have worried a lot less.


Thanks. I have read excerpts from the Alan Sohn book. I did find it was mainly about older children, as are so many resources about children with ASDS. I will definitely look for Aspergers and Young Children.
I try not to worry. I need to try harder! Thanks again.



Ettina
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03 Apr 2015, 6:58 pm

zette wrote:
Read Parenting Your Aspergers Child by Alan Sohn. He has a whole section about kids who are mainly in fantasy land, though the book is mainly about school age children so the suggestions won't be helpful for a few years. Aspergers and Young Children is a good one for the preschool years.


I really hate that book. He actually quotes himself telling a kid 'bullying is what happens when you act weird' as if that was a totally natural and justified response to a kid being different. There were a lot of other things I found upsetting too, which I can't remember off the top of my head. In general, he seems to think emotional abuse is justified if it can convince an Asperger child to act more normal.