RE: Kids w/ Classic Autism, PDD-NOS & Speech Delays

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I had a couple of people including a family member say some godawful things to me after my son was Dxed with Downs. I think sometimes people have their own socially awkward moments when they don't know the right thing to say, or maybe it comes out the wrong way.

Is your son a fairly happy child Washi? Maybe you could talk to your mom about how your son feels about his autism, and maybe it will change her perspective to something a little more positive.. Sometimes I feel sad about my son's situation, and have even had times of anger and resentment that he should have to overcome such difficult obstacles. But I see how happy he is, just the way he is, and I can't stay in that state of sadness or anger for very long.

Maybe if your mom sees that he isn't suffering, but that he's a happy little guy, maybe she can take her cues from him.

My son traits are very chlose to this!. I was wodering if to be "social" is an unusual thing for an autie.
He has an huge problem with language and I realized lately that it's due to a poor understanding. I'm working hard with receptive language. On the contrary he has not motor issues and not meltdowns and he stims only when he's tired. Thank you for sharing...

Yes, he's full of smiles, but when she visits she doesn't see that and doesn't stay long. And she blames herself too as if it were somehow her own fault.

Interesting, thanks Claudia,
Yes my daughter sometimes acts a little irrational like urgently asking for things when she doesn't really want them (i.e. a tissue or I want to go to the park etc) causing her to get cranky when she either over-tired or overly hungry.

Bump my thread
http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt156834.html
Its one of the little things that bugs me

Sometimes I call what my son does in his nappie a Poonami

Does anyone else say things out loud to their kids purely for the benefit of other people, i.e. appearances? My wife and I both realised we do this in public and around some people we know. An example was James ran off in the mall into a shop and out the back, I was jogging after him past the slightly startled shopkeeper saying 'Oh no, James you know your not supposed to go there'. Of course James doesn't know what I'm saying so its entirely for the shopkeepers benefit. Kind of a just a coping way I guess in lieue of explaining they have Autism. Kind of funny because its essentially monologuing!

Also another thing, we are in a local ASD group, and the other kids in it (bar one or two I have only seen once) are basically Aspies, I notice some of the other parents are hyper vigilant while around their kids in public places and are tense like sprung cats ready to head off disaster. Their kids will do something they are not supposed to or even look like they are going to do something and loud and heated warnings of dire consequences come out immediately.
Just something I've noticed and wondered if thats the best style of parenting (really I have no idea) for some of these kids. I've seen a couple of cases of lightening fast chip or muffin thefts produced by some of them so I guess you must have to be on your toes!

Guilty as charged. I often think I do this to give the appearance we are disciplining our child. I'm less inclined to do this now.

I haven't run into that issue yet, because my son refuses to walk in public places, so we still use a stroller or he rides in the shopping cart. This is a real pain in the butt sometimes, but after reading your posts, I'm beginning to rethink my situation.

I've been calling those Atomic Poops.

That's exactly how I am. I find I do a lot of talking to narrate my son's actions, I figure my son understands more than he lets on ... However, whenever I'm out and a stranger starts telling me how wonderful they think my son is (he is a cutie) and they start asking him questions and they get gibberish responses I just say he's autistic, and then they invariably look at me like I've just punched them in the face or something. Then they figure I'm wrong and ask how old he is, when they realize he's older than he looks they just look sad.

I had to stop my daughter from riding in shopping trolleys as she was becoming too big.

My best estimate is that my son will be too big for the cart within the next year, so the public walking problem is going to have to be addressed in that time frame. He's already too big for me to carry comfortably.

We used one of those fold out strollers until recently with James, it was just easier, but he's a little big now for it. We walk and hold his hand. He walks OK, but often turns to a 'gorilla walk' which is the only way I can describe it, hunched over taking steps with his legs wide apart swingin from side to side and leaning out using our hand as a pivot to give him balance. So sometimes carrying him on my back works, but he doesn't really hold on so I lean forward (now I'm the one acting like a Simian ). Sometimes I just carry him like a toddler.
We get a real workout!

Speaking of walking, one of James former therapist's little brother is 17 and at school. He's Autistic but mainstreamed and does well in his school work. But when he goes to the movies for example still needs a caregiver to go with him and help. She said its an odd look; a huge 6 foot tall, 220 pound teenager holding hands with a little middle aged lady.

Odd mixes of those sorts of capabilities and disabilities are in our childrens future I guess.

This thread was a good idea, I find its useful and just plain informative and interesting as much as anything to share experiences.

Thanks, I might keep bumping it

Here in Australia we have Coles and Woolworths Supermarkets which are equivalent to the US "Wallmart.

The Coles steel shopping trolleys (carts) are equipped with foldable child seats just near the handles that have a weight max of 15kg and leg space for a child < 5 yrs.

Recently they have released trolleys with red seats at the back for up two small children ( up to primary school age) to sit. Unfortunately my daughter hates these as they are far to long to be any fun (like sriving a stretch limo through a narrow shopping isle).