Needing advice please

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I have 3 boys, the oldest is typical, the middle child is high functioning, and we are not sure about the baby yet. My question is about the baby. He will be 2 next week. He is having a LOT of sensory issues. He will not eat without gagging. We are slowly introducing new foods with an OT but so far all he will eat is baby food bananas without gagging. He also does not like anything in his mouth, near his lips, or on his face or hands. His OT is only dealing with feeding right now (and that has been going on for 6 months now...with little to no improvement) and not dealing with other sensory problems. Tonight we were at Walmart and we were going to get him a potato head (he loves it) but he wanted a spinning light thingy. The whole way home he had it on and held it to his forehead and watched it. Is this another sensory thing? How can we help him with the other sensory issues? My middle son does not have bad sensory issues so we have not really gone through this yet...any help would be greatly appreciated!!

OMG spinning light thingies are awesome!

There are a number of books out there on sensory issues, but I haven't yet read any of them. I can say, however, that buying your child spinning light thingies is a good thing. You might also try a gyroscope--that was one of my favorite childhood toys.

I would say the spinning light thing is also sensory. Sensory seeking, instead of sensory avoiding, as you have with the food.

Overall, it works best to respect the sensory needs of the child. Feeding, however ... wow, hard to believe a child's sensory issues could practically starve him. I am really sorry you have to deal with that.

With sensory seeking behavior like the lights, I would consider some limitation on it, however. I've seen some of these kids "trip" with sensory items. They seek it until they can longer handle it, and then they completely avoid it. I don't have a good knowledge base on what goes on there; might be worth asking the OT.

The light thing does sound sensory. Whether or not to encourgage it is, perhaps, something for you to discuss with professionals. To an extent it can be great, helps the child self sooth, makes the world a comforting place. Then again, some kids go overboard with it and end up shutting down.

My daughter has sensory issues with food. Nothing like what you are describing, but it does make life difficult. When she was little she would drink tobasco sauce. Her food sensory stuff appears to be calming down as she grows, but she still is an extremely picky eater with strange ideas about what's tasty.

I've heard (through a mutual acquantance) of a kid who'se food sensory issues are so bad he would initially projectile vomit when solid food touched his lips. The parents were able to work through a lot of it with the help of a great OT.

Good luck to you.

My oldest son had a lot of issues with food, and did outgrow them, thankfully. He choked all the time, and it was scary. My ex husband didn't believe in psychiatry or that anything could be "wrong" and would just yell at him and tell him to stop, which was more hurtful than helpful. Once the kids and I got on our own with insurance we were able to start figuring this stuff out. By that time he wasn't choking, but was still having sensory melt downs...probably always will. One thing that we were told to do was to push him to do some of the things that freaked him out. I don't know if that was good advice, but in his case it did help, probably because we took it very slowly and gently. He would go into full blown melt down over even one drop of water hitting his skin, and could even hurt himself by accident during his tantrums. We started making him shower, just a little bit. We discussed it with him so he understood why we were doing this, and we were very kind and supportive. Over time he got to where he can take a regular shower without a problem, and more importantly, if a drop of water accidentally hits his skin he won't run into traffic or otherwise endanger himself. He was eight or nine when we started the process and had the maturity to participate.

Your situation sounds a little like a friend of mine and she said she might post here, so if it's you...hi! We've got a game going on Saturday and can roll up characters for you if you're interested. You don't have to be self conscious about autistic behavior at MY house.

PS Eldest son is still fascinated with spinning lighty up things. It was our first real clue that something was different about him. He can still settle himself down with flashing lights or by watching a fan.

Thanks for all of your help!! I still dont fully understand all the sensory stuff....like how could you want to avoid some things and seek other things....but I will learn!! The eating of course is my biggest concern because he is starting to slim down and I worry that if he doesnt eat will he need a feeding tube.

If it's that bad you need to see a pediatric gastroenterologist. He could have something serious that would be a lot less serious if treated early on. My Little Guy has something called Eosinophilic Eosophagitis and it can lead to gagging and throwing up as well as upper GI pain and some other things. If left untreated for a very long time (this is usually only seen in adults because they've let it go so long) it can even become deadly or rob the person of the ability to eat permanently. It's an allergenic condition that causes white blood cells (eosins) to attack his upper GI and esophagus. Your son could also have severe reflux, which I had as a baby and can lead to poor nutrition and problems from that, which is what happened to me. My mom fed me well, but it didn't stay down. It did resolve by the age of three and I don't have problems with reflux at all anymore.

I have never heard of anybody shutting down from stimming too much. Perhaps your child may become very interested in stimming and lose a lot of time staring at the flashing lights, but I don't see how in the world anybody could possibly shut down because of it.

Also:


I want to play D+D

Shutting down is probably a poor choice of words. What I mean by "shutting down" is that they become so involved in the stim that they become withdrawn into themselves to the point that it is very difficult for them to interact with others. It is a problem if you are trying to get a kid to relate and they are totally not relating and their attachment to a particular stim is so strong it inhibits their desire/ability to relate. Or, by "shutting down" I meant that the child's involvment with the stim interferes with the childs enjoyment of previously enjoyed activities, or that the childs involvement with the stim is so intense that it interferes with the childs desire to learn. Maybe I am not explaining so well. I find it hard to be as concise. In all events, Tracker, you have studied much more into this than I and are much more knowledgeable than I. I cede all of my posts for your review and corrections.

edit to include: I am in no way an expert. I am just a parent. My advice is totally based on the experiences of my children some other spectrum kids my kids hang out with. While I offer advice with the best of intentions, please take it with a grain of salt.

Last edited by PenguinMom on 11 Jun 2010, 4:02 pm, edited 1 time in total.

We'd love to have you but I doubt you live near enough. There is at least one other Aspie in the group, but I don't think he knows he's an Aspie, he he he. I don't know him well enough to tell him either, but he's OK. He's in the military and doing just fine, so it's not like he *needs* to know.

Thankfully, I have never had feeding issues with my son, but I have met other moms who have. If your son's feeding issues are that bad, there are feeding therapy programs out there. One of my friends took her little girl who appears to be typical to a speech therapist because she was not wanting to eat solid foods at almost 2. The therapist pointed out that her tongue was not moving properly in her mouth which was leading to the gagging. It was affecting her speech a little too. Your son's issues may require more intense intervention. I don't know what area you live in, but here in Atlanta, there is a feeding therapy program at the Emory Autism Center. But maybe if you just start with a speech therapist, that may be enough.


As far as the spinning objects, my son never really did spin toys, but he loved looking at ceiling fans. I just try to keep a balance on these activities. I would say just let him enjoy it to a degree, but try to redirect him to other activities. According to some specialists, spinning is actually good for brain development, so there may be something that he is craving with the spinning. If he becomes too withdrawn with it, one autism specialist, Dr.Stanley Greenspan, recommends that you join in and participate with him, and then over time, try to draw him into interaction with you.

I think with a lot of the sensory issues, many OT's do try to "desensitize" to a degree. Whatever the issue is, if you take it very very slow, and just try to introduce a little at a time, then over time, they can become more okay with things. For instance, my son hated to have his feet touch grass. So we just touched his feet a little at at time, and now he is fine with it. Of course, I am not an expert, so you might want to get an OT who is knowledgeable with sensory integration therapy to help you on this. It is very interesting how some things bother one kid, and another kid has no problem with it at all. I think just being in tune with your child and helping them work through these things and talking them through it (the younger the better) will help. Of course, there are some things that the person will always have difficulties with, so those you just have to work with.

Hope some of this helps! Welcome to Wrong Planet!

Thanks angelbear!! Our OT actually mentioned intensive eating therapy to us but it is not close to us. We live in the middle of NC and the closest ones are in VA or Maryland and it is 8 weeks long. I wish there were ones closer by so that we can take him daily instead of having to live out of a hotel for 8 weeks. He does work with a speech therapist 2 times a week, an OT 2 times a week and a play therapist once a week. After telling his OT about the spinning light....she told me NOT to let him play with it. Soooo I guess we have to take the toy away. I know that we have a wonderful place in NC for autism...the TEACHH center but the waiting list is a mile long and I have heard that it takes over a year to be seen by them.

I guess you better do what the OT says then! I don't know, it is always hard to know what to do. I do remember when my son was about 1 yr. old, he started laying flat on his back, looking at the ceiling fan, and flapping his hand. This was before we had a diagnosis, but I just knew instinctively that this didn't seem right for his development. I spent a good part of my day just trying to get him off the floor and interested in other things. It was so hard, because sometimes I felt guilty taking away something that he seemed to enjoy so much. So sometimes, I would just let him do it. But, I knew deep inside that I was going to lose him if I did not try to get into his world and him into mine. I am not sure if I always do the right thing when it comes to helping my son, but I know that I love him and he seems to be showing interest in the world at this point, so who knows?

I still dont see what the problem is with letting your child have some fun and stim. There is nothing wrong with trying to get your child interested in other things. Perhaps you could get him to play a game with you or something. But just letting your child be stimmy and relax for a while isn't going to harm them.

It is just like playing with legos. If you play with legos ALL the time to the exclusion of sleeping, eating, bathing, etc. then it can be a problem. But simply letting them enjoy their free time in the way which they choose isn't bad for them.

It is somewhat hard to give all the information in one forum post. I am writing a book which includes a chapter on stimming, and it should be done and available some time tomorrow. If you want to read the book, it may explain what I am trying to say better.

The thing with the sensory is it's either hypo or hyper stimulated. My daughter didn't taste mild flavors, so she wanted to taste, and only really strong flavors would appease her. Hence: drinking tobasco sauce. Hyper stimulated works the other way, they are "supertasters" and can only handle mild tastes. This is why, with sensory issues, some of the parents I speak with say their kids avoid certain things whereas others say their kids seek those same things out.


First of all, Tracker, I have the highest respect for you. Your posts are always informative and very well researched. Mine are simply the informal observations of a mom who tries her best. Please feel free to correct me if I am wrong.

The way I see it, all things are ok in moderation, just some people (for whatever reason) are unable to moderate themselves. A glass of wine is a fine way to relax after a stressful day at work, for most people. Some people, for whatever reason, can't limit themself to one glass, go overboard, and what should be an ok stress reliever becomes an problematic addiction. The same is true with junk food, t.v., poker, etc. This is where parents need to really really understand their own kids. For many kids some stims are great. Excellent ways to self sooth and relax in an overstimulating world. Some kids, however, find a particular stim highly addictive and abuse to the point it negatively affects their ability to function (similar to the wine analogy).