Parents: do you drink or smoke to get through the day?

Post Reply New Topic

I was just wondering if parents of of ASD kids rely on vices for coping skills moreso than other parents.

I depend on one thing only with regarding
parenting my son and that is prayer.

No, vices don't help.

We are Mormon, so that answer is definetly a no.

I find rocking helps and prayer.

i rely on knowledge, understanding, and my partner. finally having a diagnosis helps us a lot, it gives us that knowledge and understanding so that we can work through behaviors. and having a partner in parenting is immensely helpful, we can take turns and swap in and out as needed. we each have different strengths and tolerances, i handle certain things better and he handles others better. we do that with all our kids, but its even more valuable with our asd child. its tag team parenting.

we both rely on laughter a lot too. and i admit it, sometimes we give the bear a tiny little poke for fun =P like this past saturday, i asked my youngest what his middle name is just to see his reaction. he balls up his fists, his shoulders hike up to his ears, his brow furrows and he says very sternly, "i dont have a middle name!" he does have a middle name, we just havent gotten him to accept that fact yet. not even seeing his birth certificate has changed his mind.

we do both drink diet coke/pepsi and play video games, if you want to count those as vices =)

Cigarettes and caffiene.

My son's drive me bats. By ten o'clock, my patience is DONE. They go to bed (technically at 8pm but it's at least 2 hrs of up n down) and I have my wine and cigarettes on the balcony. Usually with my nose (and brain!) in a good serial killer book.

I don't have a partner. I don't have respite. I don't have friends. I don't have help. Until recently, I didn't have a job. So it was/is just the kids, and me. All day. All night. All the time.

Except for the last two-three hours of the day.

I enjoy a good glass of red on certain exceptionally challenging days, but otherwise, no, I definitely do not rely on vices. Obviously this is not a scientific poll, but I would wager that parents of ASD kids likely rely less on vices, not more, than the general population.

Vivienne, have you checked out some of the parent ASD blogs, both here in Canada and around the world? I swear they save my sanity! If you're interested in connecting with other parents via the blogosphere (which can really help alleviate a lot of that feeling of isolation) let me know and I can help you find blogs that most closely match your own experience

I rely on prayer as well, but have to say that chocolate and diet drinks are my vice!

Vivienne and BJ, my heart goes out to you both trying to do this on your own and with multiple children. I often think of all of you single parents out there, and how hard this must be for you.

God Bless you!! !

Here is the makeup of my family:

My wife and I have been married since 1989---we have two sons. I have diagnosed AS. Our younger son has diagnosed AS. The older son more than likely has AS. My wife is NT.

How do we cope? Though we have seen challenges with our family, we proudly embrace our family and enjoy ourselves. We have a great autism support group where I live. And we have Challenger baseball and bowling leagues with many autistic children participating. The parents really seem to enjoy their children and cope with love and understanding. I have no desire to smoke or drink, etc. to cope---cope with what? Autism? Yes, we are a family with autism---but we wouldn't have it any other way. And that's the way most of the parents of autistic children are around here. We love our family's the way they are---we're just different.

I drink a bit but my main vice is overeating. My husband relies a lot on caffiene. I don't know if it would be any different if we had an NT child though.

I don't find raising my AS son to be anymore stressful than raising my NT daughter. At this point, anyway. He was an insanely difficult infant and toddler, and I wasn't ready for any of that, but I found my solace in a wonderful mother's group. Women to cry with is such a great thing

I read gossip and humor web sites. Laughter is very helpful.

I am a bit of an "escape artist", as far as immersing myself in books, video games and whatever my main interests are at the time. I try to find time to zone out and do my own thing, usually after the kiddies are in bed or while they pursue their own interests solo as well, and this helps my stress levels immensely. But I have always done this, not just since having kids.

No smoking, quit that long before kids, and as a former addict, I monitor my drinking carefully (1 or 2 two on the weekends and that's it) and obviously stay far, far away from any drugs etc. Really my husband and I have very few, if any, vices these days...nice and boring, just how we like it.