NT Stimming vs AS Stimming?

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Stimming: Son is 4 1/2. Waiting on evaluation. I hope I am not annoying regulars with too many posts!
My son doesn’t do these things constantly, but I’d say a few times a day and it doesn’t last long. I just always thought he was quirky, very active and very silly. So, what makes this an autistic stim and not just an NT kid being funny/silly/active? Only the diagnosis? I saw some videos of autistic kids stimming and was surprised at how subtle it was sometimes. Sorry, I’m a bit ignorant and still trying to sort things out while waiting on our first appointment. plus I'd like to go in as knowledgeable as possible.

Things he does:

Jumping up and down, flapping hands a little when excited or scared. Even drools sometimes with that. I don’t know what’s up with the drool at this age . . . he is super bright and cute, I really don’t like the drool!

Spitting. Most annoying one. Spits in inappropriate places and times. Spits onto the floor, ground, his plate. Sometimes connected to what he says is stinky air or a bad taste in his mouth.

Licking—likes to try to lick us, finds it funny. Still puts his mouth on things or things in his mouth.

Throws himself down on his shins/knees (very hard and sometimes it hurts him) when angry, happy, frustrated.

Sometimes when bored or absorbed in something, he’ll pull his legs up and rock on his bottom, often with his shirt pulled over his legs.

Will often put his hands in odd positions and make funny noises when playing with his sister. Babble ‘silly talk’ and extend his hands like a fan and stick out his tongue. He also does this when he gets uncomfortable in a social situation where he is being made to have a conversation and it goes further/longer than he wants it to.

Again, I always just though he was a quirky, silly kid because he is bright and verbal. But now I’m connecting the dots. So, I guess this is stimming? Any other examples you can help me with? I actually only picked up on the jumping/hand flapping thing after I read it somewhere and realized he does it a lot. Of course, a therapist can help me understand some of this but we have to wait a month for an appointment!

the main reason to stim for someone on the spectrum is to vent emotions, be that anger, sadness, fear or happiness.
it can indeed be very subtle sometimes, or it can be a spasm simular to an epilleptic seisure, or anything in between.
the difference between a silly NT kid and a stimming ASD one is difficult to see, even for the expert.
it is also hard t say what emotion causes a person to stim, since the stim itself is no indication and differs person to person; however, the curled-up rocking is quite common and is usually associated with stress and/or fear.

I'm not very informed re stimming...will go and read up a bit!
I thought that stimming helps with lessening anxiety ?
What you describe sounds also a bit like sensory seeking behaviour?
I also don't know if what my son does is stimming.....When he is anxious, stressed or irritated he will play with his finger boards...he will do the same movement, or trick over and over again...on everything! And then elaborates about it in the finest detail....

I've actually never heard of someone stimming to vent emotions... but we do stim to ground ourselves in the sensory world.

Some of the things you describe may be stimming, others are just quirky ASD behaviors and some are jsut typical 4 yo stuff. Some here have described stimming as a repatitive action often done to relieve anxiety or as a result of anxiety (?) or as Super Trooper says to get or stay grounded. One of the questions I have been asked on every autism questionnaire I have completed is if my son has any quirky or odd behaviors. Hand flapping and toe-walking are 2 common ASD characteristics. Not to say that every autistic does these things but that many do. And not to say that every one who has these behaviors is autistic.

It's good that you are making these observations before you get to the evaluation stage. write all this stuff down and bring it with you when you finally get an appointment. Many of the things you have asked about here you will be asked about as part of the evaluation process and the more detail you can provide, the better your chances of getting a thorough evaluation with accurate results.

Kids "stim" not as a choice. It's not even necessarily an expression of an emotion, or even something they are cognizant of. It's something they have to do. Especially in stressful situations, it helps to calm and focus them. I don't know about you, but when I had a huge paper to write in grad school, I couldn't put my thoughts together without a bowl of popcorn. I had to chew. It centered me.

My son is on the Spectrum. His stims also include sucking on wet paper and spitting it. He has an insatiable need to lick, chew, suck, and spit. He also has a "routine" of sorts where he must run and run and run and then jump and crash into someone or something. He will do this from a few minutes to an hour or more if allowed to. My daughter's "routine" is to take a kid sized shopping cart and run and run and run with it. She also likes to spin in an office chair for an hour. They both can't fall asleep unless they are staring at a light. Most children have a "lovey" or "blankie" they sleep with to calm and comfort them. My daughter has a hard plastic cake she keeps in a tupperware container. Both kids like to sniff clothing tags into their noses. My son will lick any cute blond near him (my husband says that's natural for boys, but I don't know . . .).

Be sure to note your child's subjective tolerance for pain. My daughter loves to hit her head onto tiles at home, or into metal racks at stores. Immunization shots make her laugh.

I think that pretty much covers all of the stims I have ever been asked about for my kids. I personally don't believe NT's stim at all. Personally, if your child has the stims you are talking about, i would write it down and make sure the doctor knows.
Good luck

Don't you think tapping your foot as a NT or tapping your fingers is a form of stimming? It's also a repetitive unconsious movement to lesson anxiety? I also remember, when I try to fall asleep...a tend to rock myself to sleep....and as far as I know, I'm NT..... That said...I do have some SI issues....This makes me think that stimming does have a big SI cause?

I've wondered a bit about this too. I definitely tap or jiggle my foot when I am nervous however the behavior does NOTHING to lessen my anxiety. As a matter of fact, I have been conciously trying to stop doing that when I catch myself and instead concisouly relaxing my whole body and taking a deep breath when I am anxious and this does more for me than the repetitive behavior.

Some AS posters here describe stimming as something that gives them an outlet for their anxiety, thereby relieving it? I guess since we can't truly get inside each other's heads we will really never know.

Hmmm . . . thanks all. I've always known my precious boy is a little quirky and silly seems to be his way to interact sometimes as well. I suppose I just wonder where quirky and silly cross the line into AS. I realize even the specialists struggle with that one sometimes!

Anyway, thanks for the confirmation to write it all down. I don't want to over-analyze a 4 1/2 year old just being a silly kid, but again . . . some of it just happens too often and too extremely to be dismissed. Of course, I doubt any of it will show up in an evaluation since most of it happens when he is stressed, over-excited, scared, introspective.

Stimming is definitely connected to anxiety for my 4-year-old with AS/OCD. He used to write the alphabet over and over obsessively, for instance. He also has sensory issues--would chew on his clothing all day long when not doing well. He has always been into swinging on a swing and toys that he can sit on and bounce on. Now that he is on Prozac for anxiety and is working with an ABA therapist, he is doing a whole lot better.

I think that I have a writing stim, personally. Whenever I'm anxious, I write and write and write and make stuff--my kids have a ton of homemade books and flashcards, I chat on the net,. I have my website ( www.freevideosforautistickids.com ) and all the free youtube channels.