Eye contact

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My 5 year old who is non-verbal and I guess LFA never really made good eye contact, but its like suddenly he's worked out that theres 'something in it' and is making amazing eye contact with people.
I think he is seems at least semi aware of 'joint attention' and its purpose, e.g. that when we are looking each other in the eye I am more amenable to his requests (which are done through PECS).

What is your childs eye contact like? Did it develop late? Do you think it has helped in any areas?

My 3 year old only makes good eye contact with his immediate family. It's poor with everyone else. The psycologist tells us that we should have others tell him to look them in the eye. We will see how that works.

Dd(10) has always had great eye contact with people she knows well when things are going smoothly. If she's stressed or frustrated though, all bets are off. She's had the same teacher for homebound for the past two yrs, they have a great relationship, and I'm really not looking forward to breaking in a new one.

We go to a medical clinic for an unrelated issue, and the nutritionist there used to do the whole "look at me when I'm talking with you" "you're being rude" etc deal. It just makes dd withdraw even further, and frankly, I didn't blame her, he was being horrible. I pulled him aside after one appt, explained the situation, and somewhat nicely told him to knock it off. I still don't think he *gets* it, but I really don't care what's going through his head along as it doesn't make its' way across his lips.

So its stronger with people who they know better? Thats what you would expect a normal child to do, I haven't looked closely enough at my son in the presence of strangers yet to know what he's like with them. I will, its really got me thinking, but its a really positive thing I think, very encouraging for us.

Just a guess here but perhaps he has learned to recognize a look of comprehension on your face in response to the PECS card he is showing you. In other words he is looking to see if you understand what he is trying to communicate to you.

I have serious eye contact problems....there are just some people I feel comfortable and some that I dont, hard to explain.
To get Maddy to look at me I would put one of her plastic animals on my head and sing to her. I slowly started moving the toy down until we finally got eye contact. Now she is great at it....better than me. It still is obvious, especially with other kids, I think because her therapists are all adults but I think I was about 5 that she started doing a bit better.
Put some crackers or cookies on your eyes LOL.....it would make me look at you, especially if they were chocolate

Eye contact helps in all areas. It seems your boy is more interested in other people and it will help his comunication. It can be through pecs or sign language or words but it's ok. I thing it's due also to the good job they're doing with him at school. You guess he's LFA, but it's for today. Autistic children can improve a lot if they meet the right teachers and the right teaching strategy.

Eye contact isn't that important. I'm a 25 year old adult and to this day I NEVER make eye contact with anyone.

My almost seven year old son did not have a delay is speaking, but he did (still does) have a ton of pragmatic issues.

That said, he had not made spontaneous eye contact until fairly recently, and he is getting better at it. I never forced it on him, I would just kind of crouch down with him and make into a silly game. If he resisted, I would stop. I don't know If I should have been more insistent, but that was what I thought was best. I have heard mixed things about how important it is. It doesn't bother me, but the teachers are flustered by it because they use eye contact to attempt to ascertain comprehension, which is very frustrating.

The pluses for eye contact that I can see are:

1) Getting NT teachers and annoying relatives off your case.
2) It is hard to learn about facial expressions, and related conversational context while not looking at a person's face.
2a) It probably helps exercises the brain to interpret sub-contextual information and it may help the brain develop the means to do so.
3) I think it keeps his mind from drifting off, at least a little, in the middle of conversations, when he looks at people.

Reasons not to push it (as far as I can tell):

1) It can be damn uncomfortable, because people transmit too much overwhelming information through their faces.
2) Emotions may be processed in different parts of the brain than other visual stimuli, and while the practice is probably useful, people assume the person is paying attention/absorbing information that they aren't.
3) Sometimes it is easier to concentrate on the auditory messaging (especially if you have auditory processing issues) without the visual stimuli draining attention and effort.
3a)Sometimes I honestly "hear" and retain more information with my eyes shut and when people assume I am drifting off, then when I am looking at them and they think I am understanding everything.

In general I hate eye contact...it helps other though so i tolerate it. Imagine it's the same for most other kids on the spectrum.

If they do it it means there's a lot of respect. Keep in mind that they hear everything, as long as you put it in a way that isn't sedantic. So they are always listening even if they don't want to.

Maybe your son has suddenly discovered the eyes as a region of interest and something to focus on during interactions. Since he is doing it voluntarily, it probably does not make him uncomfortable.

For me, eye contact developed late. When I was your son's age, it was like, "Look straight ahead to see legs", then at twice his age, it was like, "Look up to see faces". Unlike many others on WP, eye contact does not make me uncomfortable. Whenever I don't do it, it's because I forgot to do it on purpose, in the absence of the instinct to look at the face and eyes automatically and mandatorily. When I remember, as I almost always do during important one-on-one interactions (like with professor instead of cashier at store), I can make as much eye contact as I or anyone else wants, and often into the intense gaze category.

Studies have shown that for both NT and ASD children, it is easier to think and perform on a thinking task like an arithmetic problem while not making eye contact.