Asperger Teens and Suicidal Thoughts

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What is the best way or what is helpful to an Aspie teen who is having suicidal thoughts?
The feelings of being different etc and thoughts of death.

Do NOT kill yourself, try and find something worth getting up for every day and see your doctor. A good thing to do might be to make a list of everything positive about yourself and in your life, eg parents, friends, good things people have said about you or to you and also maybe talk it over with your parents and doctor. A good book to read is Coping: A survival guide for people with Asperger Syndrome by Marc Segar which gives practical advice on day to day living for Asperger people. I hope this helps, can anyone else think of anything?

I'm sure you've heard all the "seek help" and "it gets better" already, so I'm going to advice you to start playing world of warcraft. It is not a joke.

Try to find something that he/she loves doing. bass playing got me out of bad depression.

this page might give you some ideas on how to talk to/support someone who is suicidal.

http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/

Having thoughts, or using language? Are there any actions that accompany the thoughts?

People on the spectrum tend to be black-and-white thinkers. As such, they can jump to the most extreme forms of expression when dealing with complex and difficult feelings. This is not to say not to take it seriously, nor that the feelings are not real and upsetting, but to remember that there is a difference in language and expression that should be accounted for.

When my son was going through this, we took him to get checked out at our local Children's Hospital ER. They did not admit him, but they did question him and us for some time to make sure we all felt he could be kept safe. It did send him the message that we took suicidal language very seriously, and that we wanted him to be safe - at the same time, I learned some warning signs to look for besides just language. We chose not to admit my son, because admission means several days of sedation, medication and 24-hour observation and we finally determined (with the professional advice of the ER psych team) that it was, primarily, a language issue and not a real threat.

If you're going to do this, you need to make it VERY CLEAR that it is NOT a punishment, that you care about this teen's safety and you want assurances and a professional opinion that he or she will be OK.

If this person has confided in you and you're not a parent - find a trustworthy adult that you can tell. You are not required to keep confidences that involve danger. TELL SOMEONE. If you can't find a trustworthy adult, call one of the hotlines: In the U.S., call 1-800-273-8255 - most countries have their own which you can find with a quick google.

Depends how bad it is. I think about killing myself most days of my life but I'm not yet depressed enough to actually go anywhere with it (though I did once try in the past).

Whether this is you or another person, I recommend you try and work out just how bad the thoughts are and if you/they are in a position to actually act on them before you decide what the best action is.

My 12yo son is going through the same thing right now. What seems to help him some is talking about what he thinks the root issues are that are causing him to feel that way. Sometimes you can address them sometimes you can't.

Don't really have much else to add other than to say good luck and I understand what you are going through if this is for a family member.

If it's for you, please consider that just on this forum alone you have people that are concerned about you and want to help. You aren't alone.

make sure you dont have painkillers in the house, as they are less likely to do something that is more difficult and lacks easy access. Also check the house for any other obvious means of suicide such as razors, ropes and poisons and lock them away.

try to be positive and verbally demonstrate how important they are to you, how much they have to offer and how special they are. Stress that life improves once they get out of the teens years and tell them about all the fun grown up things they have to look forward to (such as spending their money on what they want and not being told what to do).

If they are open to it self esteem books and audio books are very good (just put teen self esteem in amazon search).

I think the main thing is to be very firm that its 'not ok' to kill yourself and that you love them very much and will help them feel better.

I would not word it as 'not ok' as in like 'its bad behavior'.....as that would probably alienate them more. I know one reason I did not tell anyone when I was feeling suicidal when I was 15, is because I thought my mom and others would be mad at me for feeling that way. So I'd be very careful about wording that is used.......as you don't want them feeling like they came to you for help only to be misunderstood further.

well everyone is different so its best to phrase things depending on the child.

I do think there is a difference between feeling suicidal and acting on it, i think its fine to say 'everyone feels like that sometimes' but i do think its important to add 'but you must never try and kill yourself'.

I know my mum portrayed suicide as 'special' and 'interesting' and glamorized it somewhat to me, i think it would have done me a lot of favours if she had been more stern about it and said 'its not something we do', 'its not an option' rather than making it seem like something acceptable, normal and even desired.

I know several adults with depression who dont kill themselves only because they dont want to upset their families so i think family disapproval of suicide is clearly a motivator not to act on it.

See that's kind of where I'm at but I know one can only drive themselves to continue to live just in an attempt not to hurt family or friends...for so long before even that is not enough to counteract the pain at all, not that it counteracts it much to begin with but yeah. Point being there has to be some relief or some other option when you really get to the point of planning to commit suicide 'it will make your family sad' does not help much when it gets to that point...and you might even run into the thought of 'they're better off without me anyways.' That said, adults tend to have more impulse control than teens...so I don't see how that being enough for some adults not to act on it really correlates with teen suicide.

well I dont want to row with you on someone elses thread so we will have to just agree to disagree.

not sure what that phrase means at all and I was just trying to discuss the topic at hand..I don't feel like I went off of it. But yeah if you think the best way to deal with teen suicide is 'suicide isn't allowed so don't do it no matter how bad you feel.' is the best approach I'd imagine we will have to agree to disagree.....as I think it is much more complex and should be approached more carefully.