Can grief at a young age bring on or accentuate Asperger's?

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Hello I’m new here.

A year ago it was suggested to me by a professional that my daughter age 14 may have Asperger's.

After a lot of tests we were advised she did not have a ‘diagnosis’, but did have some of the traits of Asperger's.

Now that I know more about the subject I see some aspects of it in me and also in my mother.

My first wife died when my daughter was 3 years old.

My daughter’s tendencies only became evident some time after that.

Over the following 10 years she participated in very good grief counseling (specific to children) so had a lot of opportunities to deal with feelings for her mother.

I remarried a few years after my first wife died so my daughter now has a step mother.

I’m just curious can an intense grief experience such as the loss of a parent at such a young age bring on Asperger's or accentuate it, or would she have turned out this way anyway?

Thankyou
Regards
EP

My son started showing signs of Autism when he was 3 years old, as well. Autism is not a stress-related condition. Having lost her mother, may have intensified her Autistic traits, since stress is generally difficult for a person in the spectrum to handle. So, no. One did not cause the other.

There is a theory I like. I will post it again (sorry people).
Read info by Dr. Natasha Cambell-McBride, GAPS diet. She has an interesting spin on this topic.

Hi Ed; welcome to Wrong Planet.

I am not an expert, but by my understanding of Aspergers; no. It's a neurological difference, not an emotional disorder. Some brain researchers have noted a difference in brain plasticity in folks with Aspergers/autism.
http://www.wrongplanet.net/article395.html

Stress will exaggerate some autistic traits, but stress is not the origin of the condition.

It is quite common for AS traits to only appear obvious after age 3 although many of us who have had kids diagnosed after that look back and do see some signs in the child's development that may have been a little off. My son's autism was not apparent until he started preschool at age 4 but as I look back, he was always on the late side of the curve in each developmental stage. Not enough so that the p doc would take my concerns seriously when I expressed them but late enough that I did start to worry. So all that I guess to say that the appearance of her symptoms occurred after her mother's death is most likely coincidental not cause and effect.

Welcome to WP, EP.

My guess is it probably has more to do with your quote above than her mom's death. As others have said, it is common for some kids not to have noticeable issues until after 3.

It is also not uncommon for people to live all the way to adulthood, only to realize autistic traits in themselves after their children have issues or get diagnosed. There are actually a lot of spectrumites in my family. I just never knew it until my daughter was diagnosed and I started understanding things in a new way.

I agree with the others that it is neurological. That said I do not want you think stress has no relation, but it is not causal. Stress (just like with NTs) can make Aspies less able to focus on coping mechanisms. So there might be some temporary functionality loss when dealing with stressors. Aspie's also tend to handle stress less well than NTs, anyway. At 3, I doubt she had coping mechanisms, anyway, but just so that you know, future stress may make her temporarily more autistic appearing while the stressors are in place. Also her mom's death may have had you focusing intently on her and you might have noticed things more readily. But grief is not going to cause an NT to become autistic; or make an autistic person actually more autistic.

Last edited by ASDMommyASDKid on 29 Jan 2013, 9:40 pm, edited 2 times in total.

YES

Hi Everyone

Just wanted to thank you all for the advice which was helpful and reassuring.

Regards

EP