Why are there laws against paedophilia?

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As a survivor, I find it unproductive to compare physical and sexual abuse. Abuse is abuse.

Clearly you've never been through sexual abuse nor known anyone who has. While I can't claim the former, I CAN claim the latter. Stop trying to rationalize this, DD! Human emotions aren't always rational and the particular way the brain(and the mind it creates) responds to being sexually violated is quite distinct from physical abuse.

PTSD can be difficult to treat and extremely difficult(and in some cases impossible) to cure. Some people never recover; but for most recover is a highly complicated and lengthy process that many of them cannot do alone. How DARE you act like sexual abuse is "good" for people because it "makes them stronger"

But hey, don't take my word for it! You should educate yourself about the effects of sexual abuse and what those who suffered through it actually have to say about what life is like for them as adults. I imagine you're not trying to sound callous, but you sound bloody ignorant about this subject and are drawing conclusions without any experience or knowledge about sexual abuse.

That statement in bold is unprovable at this time since you cannot possible determine what's going on in that 15 year old's mind. The structural development of the brain being incomplete and distinct from that of an adult is also not proof that EVERY single teenager of aged 15 had exactly the same level of maturity. Furthermore, WTF makes you think that everyone who is older than the age of 18 has the emotional maturity to truly appreciate and anticipate the consequences of sexual intercourse? Some men in their 20s(and even beyond) don't fully comprehend the significance of being a father and go around shagging women with no plans to stick around which is why the LAW puts them on the hook for child support.

Another thing, I cannot possible speak for all teenage boys but when I was 15 or 16 I was not looking for "everlasting love" whatsoever! I was looking to get laid but was not interested in any kind of serious relationship. I suspect underage boys who bang adult women see the offer as a chance for easy sexual access and as something to brag about to their guy friends and don't see it as an intimate act the way you women do.

I never said it was good for people! Besides I said it can make you stronger, not that it always does. Cancer can make you stronger, do you think being molested is worse than having cancer? Do you think me saying cancer could make you stronger means that I think cancer is a good thing? All I'm saying is that being a helpless basket case does not always follow being sexually abused, and to believe that actually makes it more difficult for victims to heal because in an odd sort of way, it is judging and de-humanizing them, saying "oh yeah, i pity you. you're never gonna get better. You're damaged goods." Treating rape victims as inconsolate, helpless objects of pity is just as destructive as telling them to "get over it". Sexual abuse should indeed be taken very seriously, but it's not the end of the world either.

I agree with puddingmouse. Abuse is abuse and all abuse is wrong. Of course there's varying degrees of abuse but I honestly don't think beating your kids is any more okay than molesting them, it's just as bad it's just our society has ideas about corporal punishment being justified which makes us much more excusing of that particular sort of abuse. I loathe all kinds of abuse and I will never abuse my children in any way if/when I have kids, not even as punishment (ie spanking).

Hey donnie_darko, I agree that abuse of any form is a terrible thing. But I am not going to agree that the aftermath of sexual abuse is the same as physical abuse. Although I've experienced neither, I know folks who have and from what I've been told they are different and really not comparable. HOWEVER, sexual abuse really screws up a persons sexuality and makes it hard for them to have healthy sexual relationships. With rape, the issue isn't so much being attacked/physically hurt as much as it is being violated. That is certainly what rape survivors have told me themselves.

Spanking in a disciplinary context isn't going to wreck a child (assuming the parent doesn't use and blunt object that would cause injury). I think it isn't something that should be regularly used, but for really bad behavior it should potentially be an option. I don't necessarily view spanking as child abuse, however I think it is very close to the line, and why if as a parent you decide to have that as an option, it should be used very sparingly and only on something really big.


Child Abuse, particularly sexual abuse, isn't about anything more than power. The adult uses their position of authority to take advantage of the child in a horrific manner. While the adult may try to rationalize it as love, or the child wants it; I highly doubt the child wants anything to do with it.

There have been people that have committed suicide because they were sexually abused as children, this isn't some laughing matter.

If you look at the Ancient Romans they had no problem if someone "amused themselves" on a young slave boy/girl; but all hell would break loose if it was a Roman boy or a Roman Girl. They recognized it was damaging to children, but of course didn't care what people did to their slaves.

Also a lot of abuse victims will then abuse children when they were grown up, just like they had been abused, beginning the cycle all over again.

I think trying to normalize this is disgusting.

They are different, but I can't say which is worse. Being violated produces a dark, sick feeling that being beaten doesn't.

I guess it depends on the person, I guess for me personally, I've never been too disturbed by the idea of somebody touching me against my will, I mean it would upset me and creep me out but I think I'd get over it fairly quickly. I guess I just don't really have a highly developed sense of 'honour'? I can endure physical pain quite well but I still hate it, I'd take emotional pain over physical pain because physical pain makes me emotionally upset as well. You can't really enjoy spending time with people you love when you're in physical pain.

I think you could find people who were abused physically, emotionally, verbally and sexually who would also testify the sexual wasn't necessarily the worst form of abuse they endured.

Anyway I'm sorry if I offended you. I just disagree with this notion that sexual abuse is the single most evil thing in the world. It's definitely bad but I don't see it as being impossible to recover from or completely unforgivable. But that's just me and my lack of a highly developed sense of 'honour'. I don't really care about the military dying for my country either or the fact that I enjoy listening to girly music.

The Age of consent laws are BS and the US (and to a lesser extent, Western and parts of Central Europe) have a stick up their collective asses about "pedophilia" and whatnot.



I -know- people who were in such situations....and I'd say pointing out the US predominant culture glorifying beating children and all the myriad BS vis-a-vis treatment of those who were "Sexually abused" sis correct.



.....or they simply have a relation which both love each other, and you insert your moralizing statements and project them on other people.....

Also, no. Such relationships are not "anything more then power" - if it was so there'd be different and other ways to exercise such power



Source?



I think trying to suppress and change society in this specific manner is horribly wron

Last edited by Warsie on 02 Oct 2012, 10:57 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Warsie, nobody ITT including myself is making light of physical abuse. But that is not the topic of discussion here, and NOT all victims of child molesters were raped by members of their own family or even by people they know. Most children abducted by strangers are abducted for the purpose of sexual abuse. Physical abuse is usually done by parents, step parents, relatives.




But you are correct that child molesters aren't after power with what they do. They already have power due to their age, their size, and quite often their authority over the child and the exploit this power to selfishly indulge their sexual impulses at the expense of the child.

To be honest and although this ma sound mean but I think they should be sent to antarcitca to freeze to death or sent to a 3rd world country where it is allowed.

Could you expand on this?

Some people aren't looking for power. Perhaps they just want to see a child burn.

But, as a 22 yr old male, I'm pretty sure if you didn't want it, you could do something to stop it. As a little child, I don't think you could have any say in what happens. I experienced sexual abuse when I was 7yrs old. It was so awful to me that I put it out of my mind for 7 years. The horror I felt when I suddenly remembered what had happened is indescribable. It really did happen and I can hardly believe that I was able to forget such a thing. I knew nothing about sexual abuse then, but my young mind knew it was wrong and that the abuser wanted it to be kept secret. He was big and strong and I had no way of stopping it, so I don't think I bothered trying and it happened before I had a chance to realise what was going on anyway. I remember feeling very embarrassed and ashamed and I never said a word to anyone. It still affects me today and it only happened one time and wasn't serious, compared to what some kids go through. So, I can only imagine what other people feel, if they've suffered long term serious abuse. Coincidentally, or perhaps not, I became painfully shy at around the same time, having been a very outgoing youngster. I really don't know if this was the cause, but I can't help wondering if it is to blame.

BTW As I type this, the majority of people in the UK are worrying about the safety of a 5yr old girl, who was abducted on Monday. The police have a suspect, but we don't know what has happened to her yet. If anyone is wondering why people get hysterical about paedophiles, this is the reason.

I became very withdrawn and much less confident when I was about 8 years old, when it first happened to me.