Favorite philosophical joke.

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16 Oct 2013, 6:02 am

A woman was apparently sat on a bench when she needed to put some litter in the bin. While she was walking over to it, Arthur Schopenhauer came and took her seat. When she came back, she said 'What are you doing here?'
'Well, that's the ultimate question, isn't it?'

wittgenstein
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16 Oct 2013, 2:30 pm

Here is a site filled with philosophical jokes!
http://consc.net/phil-humor.html

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16 Oct 2013, 4:00 pm

A black, a Jew and a Catholic enter a bar. They were polite, paid their bill promptly and left a good tip. I think one might have had gas.

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16 Oct 2013, 4:02 pm

fibonaccispiral777 wrote:

Love that!

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16 Oct 2013, 4:50 pm

fibonaccispiral777 wrote:

All I can think of for some reason is-

Friedrich Nietzsche is dead- God

I love that.

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16 Oct 2013, 5:01 pm

How many Zen Buddhists does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it. And one to NOT change it.

How many solipsists does it take to change a light bulb?

They wouldnt. The darkness doesnt really exist.

How many Nihilists does it take to change a light bulb?

They wouldnt. What's the point?

Ladywoofwoof
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18 Oct 2013, 2:43 pm

Schroedinger's cat walks into a bar....
He also doesn't.

GGPViper
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18 Oct 2013, 2:57 pm

Ladywoofwoof wrote:

Schroedinger's cat walks into a bar....
He also doesn't.

Schroedinger appears in court, charged with animal abuse.

Judge: How do you plead? Guilty or Not Guilty?

Schroedinger: Well, it's complicated...

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18 Oct 2013, 3:10 pm

ruveyn wrote:

Rene Descarte was at a party and his host asked him if he wanted another cognac. Descartes replied "I think not..." and vanished in a puff of smoke.

ruveyn

This is what i was going to post.

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18 Oct 2013, 5:02 pm

GGPViper wrote:

Ladywoofwoof wrote:

Schroedinger's cat walks into a bar....
He also doesn't.

Schroedinger appears in court, charged with animal abuse.

Judge: How do you plead? Guilty or Not Guilty?

Schroedinger: Well, it's complicated...

I like that, but feel compelled to point out it's a science joke, not a philosophy one.

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naturalplastic
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18 Oct 2013, 6:27 pm

GGPViper wrote:

Ladywoofwoof wrote:

Schroedinger's cat walks into a bar....
He also doesn't.

Schroedinger appears in court, charged with animal abuse.

Judge: How do you plead? Guilty or Not Guilty?

Schroedinger: Well, it's complicated...

Like both. Even if they are more science than philosophy.

Shroedinger's Cat knocked over Russell's Teapot, and made such a clatter that Occam cut himself with his razor!

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18 Oct 2013, 11:36 pm

The Buddha goes into a pizza hut and says "make me one with everything"

fibonaccispiral777
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19 Oct 2013, 4:16 am

GGPViper wrote:

Ladywoofwoof wrote:

Schroedinger's cat walks into a bar....
He also doesn't.

Schroedinger appears in court, charged with animal abuse.

Judge: How do you plead? Guilty or Not Guilty?

Schroedinger: Well, it's complicated...

There is a theory that if a chocolate bar is placed in a box it is both eaten and not eaten. They call this phenomenon...Shrodinger's Kit Kat

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24 Oct 2013, 9:50 am

Quote:

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road ?

Epictetus : And what concern is it to you what the chicken does or does not ? Crossing the road is in your power, the fact that the chicken crosses the road is not.

Marcus-Aurelius : Remember how so many brilliant chickens have crossed the road in the past and are now long forgotten.

Seneca : My dear Lucilius, I understand how much interest you find in the question of why the chicken may have crossed the road. Many chickens that we know have crossed the road for several reasons, and I will expose them to you. In the ancient times, we know that Xerces' chickens have crossed the road to try to invade Greece ; some chickens in Nero's house have been spotted to cross the road in order to fornicate. [... snipping 15 pages ...] But my own views on the topic may differ from that of our school. Be wary not to go too deep into theoretical questions : for what time have we left ?

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