Why? (About Religion)

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I don't understand religion.

Anyway, every Friday night, the girls in the house have to light candles (for Shabbat. I'm Jewish.). I dislike it when I'm forced to do this even though I no longer want a part in religion and tradition. I especially dislike it when my grandparents come over because this reinforces the expectation of me to participate in religious rituals such as this. I'm an Atheist who rejects - and utterly detests - religion, especially forced practice. Last year, my parents spent a lot of money on my Bat Mitzvah (a Jewish ceremony where a person becomes an adult and is admitted into their community) and now I regret having it.

I remember asking a teacher at my school what to do if I don't feel I fit into the religion (Judaism) and its beliefs in God. When she answered, "Don't worry. Maybe you won't understand it now, but in time you may find that you fit with these beliefs" I wanted to punch her in the face for expecting me to allow her to shove her beliefs down my throat through euphemism-like "truisms".

I don't feel that I can admit this belief to my parents, especially when my grandparents are around. Why do they feel I have to believe what they believe?

This also connects another thread I don't mind you guys reading:http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt159994.html

Why indeed? I perfectly understand where you stand. Not that far from being told I had to go to the [Episcopal] church, for no apparent reason. With my mother it was not even believing what she believed [to this day I do not REALLY know what she believed], it was doing what she thought we ought to do.

And some people get uptight if you do not support thrit football team - or support a different team.

It is not something I really understand, though it is a common human phenomenon.

Irony - my mother raised us to be totally OPPOSED to forcing our ideas - including religion - on anybody. COGNITIVE DISSONANCE - Go to church because I say so but do not interfere with the beliefs of others. Sure, mom.

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You have to find your own road. Me, I kept as quiet as I could [a few protests slipped out] till I was free to stop going. Then I followed MY road where it took me. Happens it took me into the church - and that made my mother mad. Go figure.

In your particular case, Hebrews have been "chosen" to be G-d's witnesses here on earth, and your parents and grandparents are hopefully answering any questions (like during part of the Haggadah of Pesach) so you actually can understand what all of that is all about. I believe it is in Deuteronomy where they are told, "When your children ask ... tell them ..."


Like your teacher had said, you may (might) some day feel much differently. But for now, your parents/grandparents are doing what they believe best for everyone ...

... and I personally hope you do find a way to go tell them how you feel today and try to work something out with them.

Last edited by leejosepho on 20 May 2011, 10:18 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Oh, how I love irony. Oh, and sarcasm. That's a must for me.

Wait a minute, isn't this America?

Religion is the expression of faith. It is also arbitrary dogma, meaningless ritual, and an opiate for the masses.

Merriam-Webster defines 'Religion' as "the service and worship of God or the supernatural", "commitment or devotion to religious faith or observance", "a personal set or institutionalized system of religious attitudes, beliefs, and practices", "scrupulous conformity", "conscientiousness", and "a cause, principle, or system of beliefs held to with ardor and faith."

Religion comes from the Latin word "religiare", meaning "to bind". So the real meaning of religion at least literally is to place someone into bondage for service to a belief system. Thus, there is no freedom in religion.

Amen to that!

Who has suggested there should be?

I was born a christian but gave up on it by the age of 5. I have many bad memories an abusive aspie father who took God literally to sunday school teachers who would poke fun of aspie-ness and berate me constantly in front of my sunday school class from the age of 3 through 11. The pastors at my church were and still are full of s**t. Most had nothing more then a 3rd grade eduction anyways before coming to the states - most of which, if their not on a power-trip, are off trying to make money off of the ignorance of others. I left God and Theism for a very long time. I recently came back to being a theist when I turned 20 and have been one for the last 4 years. Judaism was what brought me back to God.

Something I've learned to do was to separate my emotional standing with a particular view, philosophy, ism, or religion and judge it on its own intellectual merit. Doing this may you lead in many directions but I have found that it has allowed to have admiration for all of those ways at looking at life, even if the practitioners are less then ideal.

Its not the end of the world. You're still young and you probably live at home. You have 5X what you've lived now to live after you leave home. I think its actually stupid to make any personal decision now as to what your going be, you might as well make the most of this and take it as a chance to learn the faith you were born into thoroughly. The people you have to up with will make it hard to view the faith you take part in seriously. But try to get the most one could from this and become an atheist in every way possible when you move out of your parents house. You will also discover that your faith Judaism has a lot of good advice for all of humanity, not just jews, and shouldn't conflict too much with your Atheism. You can be in good standing with Judaism and be an atheist if you live accordingly to its ethics and principles. Judaism is like shakespeare, either it has something to say everybody, or it has nothing to say to anybody.

Yes.

This is America. Mid Atlantic, New England, Southwest, Midwest.

What, America does not have enough irony for you?

No, not the irony. I meant that we're not supposed to force our ideas, but others expect you to have similar beliefs as them. So much for freedom!

According to who? The US has always been a fierce battleground for ideas. You are free to have your ideas and to proselytize it as well. That's how all free countries mature. We also have codes of etiquette and ethics with regards to how we are to behave around one another to keep our society civil, though those safeguards don't always hold true.

Just because we believe in Freedom doesn't mean we believe in Freedom to do anything, but rather, Freedom to inalienable rights that were endowed to us by a creator. The French believe in freedom but also neuter it by having Equality as an equal counterweight.

You live at home man... that's also to consider. Your parents house... your parents rules... You could always run away / move out but do consider that you live rent free, meals are free, you don't have to pay for car or medical insurance, etc.

Right. That is the USA. If you don't like it here, go to France.

Space here for 15 jaded quotes on the subject of Freedom

What does freedom have to do with forcing unrealistic ideas and having unrealistic expectations?

Freedom of speech is not freedom from speech.

You have the right to ask me to remain silent.

Yes, and for those who might be inclined to misunderstand or to mis-interpret:

That is a "Please please me ..." request and not a command to shut up!

Mixed issue.

I don't know your age, but if you live in a house with others, you should try to respect the beliefs and customs of others. I'm not sure how much "involvement" some of these issues involve, but if they aren't too burdensome, perhaps it's best to go along with them to promote family unity.

Some atheists will go to Easter and Christmas services just to keep mom and dad happy...because it's a family tradition. Some do not.