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Missing 5-year-old autistic boy found dead in pond

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CarlM
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27 Dec 2019, 9:52 am

I suppose the relevance of autism is that he was not engaged in play with the others and they didn't notice when he walked away.

Missing 5-year-old autistic boy found dead in pond by his grandmother's house

They almost lost me at a younger age. I was playing near the CT river in St. Johnsbury VT with older kids and I floated down river wearing a life jacket. I was probably doing my own thing and they didn't notice me missing at first. I don't remember the incident though.


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Fnord
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27 Dec 2019, 10:51 am

Why did it take them almost 24 hours to find his body in a pond that was only 50 feet from his home?  That is the first place they should have looked.  Besides, if they knew he was autistic, then why were they not watching him?


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27 Dec 2019, 10:57 am

Any 5 year old should be watched like a hawk when there is a body of water nearby.

I don’t get it.


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Apuleius
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27 Dec 2019, 10:59 am

Fnord wrote:
Why did it take them almost 24 hours to find his body in a pond that was only 50 feet from his home?  That is the first place they should have looked.  Besides, if they knew he was autistic, then why were they not watching him?


Pond water is a lot darker than you might expect. Once the kid's clothes are waterlogged and he's under the surface, you have to drag the pond to find him.



Fnord
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27 Dec 2019, 11:03 am

Apuleius wrote:
Fnord wrote:
Why did it take them almost 24 hours to find his body in a pond that was only 50 feet from his home?  That is the first place they should have looked.  Besides, if they knew he was autistic, then why were they not watching him?
Pond water is a lot darker than you might expect. Once the kid's clothes are waterlogged and he's under the surface, you have to drag the pond to find him.
No footprints in the mud or snow?  No jagged hole in the ice?  No loud splash as he went in?  No further splashing as he thrashed about to stay afloat?  C'mon ... really?


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Apuleius
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27 Dec 2019, 11:06 am

Fnord wrote:
Apuleius wrote:
Fnord wrote:
Why did it take them almost 24 hours to find his body in a pond that was only 50 feet from his home?  That is the first place they should have looked.  Besides, if they knew he was autistic, then why were they not watching him?
Pond water is a lot darker than you might expect. Once the kid's clothes are waterlogged and he's under the surface, you have to drag the pond to find him.
No footprints in the mud or snow?  No jagged hole in the ice?  No loud splash as he went in?  No further splashing as he thrashed about to stay afloat?  C'mon ... really?

Drowning doesn't look like drowning.



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27 Dec 2019, 11:08 am

I think that this issue has little to do with autism. 5 year olds need proper adult supervision, especially when there’s water nearby.

As a mom, I’m having difficulty envisioning this situation...


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kraftiekortie
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27 Dec 2019, 11:10 am

This sort of thing happens all the time with well-meaning parents, unfortunately.



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27 Dec 2019, 11:15 am

That sort of thing happens all the time with neglectful parents, unfortunately.

I'm sorry, I know I'm blaming the parents of a dead child, but at least I'm not blaming the victim himself.


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TwilightPrincess
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27 Dec 2019, 11:16 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
This sort of thing happens all the time with well-meaning parents, unfortunately.


But...how?

I can’t relate.


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TwilightPrincess
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27 Dec 2019, 11:17 am

Fnord wrote:
That sort of thing happens all the time with neglectful parents, unfortunately.

I'm sorry, I know I'm blaming the parents of a dead child, but at least I'm not blaming the victim himself.


You can’t really blame a 5 year old for drowning.

You also can’t blame a 5 year old who accidentally shoots himself because his parents left the gun cabinet unlocked.


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kraftiekortie
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27 Dec 2019, 11:23 am

They probably should have supervised the child properly. I agree with that.

But this sort of thing does happen too often. You hear stories all the time, and hear it on the news.

Even a momentary lapse in supervision can cause this to happen.

It could very well be that the parents didn’t properly supervise the child. But I wouldn’t absolutely assume that this was the case. We don’t know the whole story.

People can jump to conclusions too quickly, and pillory parents who have just lost their child. This happens on the Internet all the time.



Catlover5
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27 Dec 2019, 11:25 am

This is so sad.



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27 Dec 2019, 11:27 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
... It could very well be that the parents didn’t properly supervise the child. But I wouldn’t absolutely assume that this was the case...
Do you really believe that the child would have drowned if he had been properly supervised?

Really?

:roll:


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TwilightPrincess
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27 Dec 2019, 11:28 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
They probably should have supervised the child properly. I agree with that.

But this sort of thing does happen too often. You hear stories all the time, and hear it on the news.

Even a momentary lapse in supervision can cause this to happen.

It could very well be that the parents didn’t properly supervise the child. But I wouldn’t absolutely assume that this was the case. We don’t know the whole story.

People can jump to conclusions too quickly, and pillory parents who have just lost their child. This happens on the Internet all the time.



It doesn’t happen THAT often.

There are a lot of bad parents out there...

I’ve never observed something like this happen when there’s been proper care, supervision, and parenting.


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27 Dec 2019, 11:31 am

There’s a divide on this thread between parents and non-parents with non-parents being more forgiving of the parents.

Perhaps it has to do with some of us remembering what it’s like to have a 5 year old and how far out of our way we’d go to ensure that child’s safety.


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