Dear (Anonymous),
Thank you for trashing me to my best friend- if you hadn't, he wouldn't have told me and I would have never been aware of what a two-faced, backstabbing, melodramatic, lying, gossiping, jealous, petty, banal, unintelligent, sleazy, walking venereal disease you are.
Actually, I was aware the entire time, but chose to ignore you- as you're pretty much a worthless excuse for a Human being, and your shenanigans are, quite honestly, not that interesting. However, the things you said to my chum, and the fact that you are so painfully oblivious to the fact that he would obviously tell me as soon as he got off the phone with you- was quite entertaining. Whenever my ego has taken a beating, I can always count on losers like you to make me look good.
You say that I am living in a fantasy world, when in fact I am more in touch with reality than you are. At least I never had to screw EIGHTY different men to figure out who I am. Oh, and I wouldn't brag about it if I were you. You criticize me for being "anti-social", but the truth is that I'm for the most part a happy person and don't need constant reassurance from other people to feel good about myself- unlike you. As such, I won't ever have to contend with being an undesirable, washed-up bar-fly with sand up my cooter and shit-for-brains later in life, unlike yourself.
I am not exactly the person you think I am, and despite the fact that you seem to think I am incredibly stupid- I'm smarter (not to mention a helluva lot better looking) than you'll ever be in your entire life. If I'm so incompetent, why do I constantly have to explain big, scary words to you? Furthermore, you can try to come between my best friend and I all you like. There is no competition. Lastly, you crack me up. It says more about you than it does about me, that you're so threatened by a "ret*d".
Have a great day, try not to catch any more STDs.
-Apollyon