and the point is?

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someone overseas that i talk to online called the police, who busted through my apartment this afternoon, rifled through my things, confiscated my meds and sharp objects, and escorted me (in cuffs) to the psych ward at the hospital.

i was released under two hours and they had nothing of value to bring to my situation (as per usual).

i have been suicidal for... well, pretty much my entire life. i used to try to kill myself even as a kid. i held out until adulthood thinking it would get better. but it doesn't. the lack of caring is just as apparent as it was back then.

tbh, i don't think i know what happiness is or have experienced it. i think i'd know if i did?

talent... everyone has talent, and i'm in the bottom .5% percentile that gets trampled upon while they rush to the top. persons with aspergers have active imaginations. we're children. i'd like to fly on a dragon someday, but i doubt that will happen regardless of what talent or worth i yield.

dreaming of dragons and travel seems more sensible than dreaming of a stable and secure life full of love and acceptance. that's what neurotypicals are allowed to have. the rest of us get to wallow down in the bile of humanity and are thankful if we ever get a glimpse of the light.

That's pretty dire, that some casual online person called the cops on you. I guess you have to be more guileful about actual contact details. Euww and they rifled thru your things as well.

As far as suicide goes, I never consciously tried suicide but I sought death in other ways which always eluded me. It was interesting, at one stage if I'd have thrown myself out of a high rise there would have been a mattress truck passing underneath, lol. This is a prison planet, but there's no escape, you have to serve your term.

he actually sent messages to my online contacts asking for my address, which i then had to explain to them (some being freelance clients, others artists i manage) as to why this seemingly crazy person was contacting them for personal details.

pk this dude that f****d u up is an a**hole pure and simple. If he ever f***s with you like that again i say u beat the s**t outa him with a baseball bat......try not to kill him

other than that the externet is a place full of wackos and crazy people that just love to mess you up
some take pleasure in it others think they are actually doing good. (insane right?) anyway you can only deal with one s**thead at a time just know that with his type of personailty he is likly to be killed by a person with less restraint than you.

Yawn, if you dont enjoy life I think thats your fault, i mean if hitting ur head againest the wall isnt fun anymore then do something else, whats stopping you other than you and you preconcived notions?

what's twisted is that you assumed that this person did it out of malice and that i should beat him within an inch of his life. who's relying on preconceived notions now?

quit trolling my topic. i believe it's grounds for being banned.

have you ever tried St. Johns Wort?

Clearly, he really cared about you, and I know it would have been a really bad invasion of your privacy, but maybe he didn't know what else to do. There are no rights and wrongs in this situation really.

If you find yourself thinking about suicide, just don't do it. There is ALWAYS something to live for. ALWAYS. No matter how bad your situation is, you still have the joy of eating, breathing, seeing. Nothing can justify suicide.

I know life can really bite at times, or most of the time, but it can and will get better. Hang in there, and don't do anything stupid.