Why so called friends shut me down?

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Initially they were positive to hang out with me in between classes and that who just met. For instance one girl I met from the Vietnam class group that we going to be hanging out for 14 days. She initially want to get to know each others and stuff. Then suddenly doesn't reply my messages, in reflection of her messages. Doesn't want to hang out as saying too busy to do classes on schedule and that for until the end of semester for first classes of the Vietnam field trip thing.

I don't get it. Why I am so victimised of sudden turn downs and that from people, including those just met. Now this going to be very awkward because she is going with me on trip for the research course after she done something to me.

She knows, including other friends, that I have ASD and I say it like in case of miscommunication please clarify. Well looks like I am victimised.

I kind of have that problem too so I know the feeling. If it happens a lot maybe you could try getting some feedback from them to see if there might be something you could do about it. Also, I don't think most people know very much about autism. There seems to be a lot of bad information and stereotypes about autism too so they might not understand it when you tell them.

The problems with the feedback thing is am not having any of those. The closest advice I get is from my psychologist, but the psychologists never with me in these situations.

So it seems we are rather biased from NTs perspective. However, during my first professional internship experience I had this year the coworkers never judge on my social and communication skills in such workplace. But as friends, it seems does so.

Have you ever asked one of your friends if you did something to offend them or make them uncomfortable? If you didn't it might be something to try.

The reason why people in your internship are more accepting towards you might be because the interactions might be a little more structured than when being around friends so it might be easier for you to communicate with each other. It might also be because if you're talking to people in your internship the interactions might revolve around more than just social skills alone than it would when you're hanging out with friends.

Lose the "victim" mentality and, ideally, the ASD-as-explanation-for-ALL-your-behavior thing. There are all sorts of things that could be going on, like:

(1) You come on a bit too strong: it takes a while to go from casual acquaintance to actual friends. If you're assuming a friendship from the get-go and behaving as such, there's a good chance you're spooking your classmates.

(2) It's also possible that you initially hit it off, carry on with the getting to know you process and, well, it turns out there's not enough "there" to be good friends... so the classmate drops you crack to the casual acquaintance category. Which is normal. No one's going to be BFFs with everybody else. This isn't "victimization". This might not even be you doing anything wrong. It's just how it goes n the making friends process.

I think telling your psychologist, in as much detail as possible, exactly what you've done and what the classmate-slash-potential-friend did. A communication log, if you will, and getting their feedback. This seems to be an ongoing issue for you, one that's impacting other areas of your social life (like dating) and you're the common denominator. If the feedback from the doc isn't helpful, you may want to consider getting a second opinion from another psychologist. You're trying SO hard, something's just not working and help IS available!