Aspie adults: how happy are you over-all?

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I've been depressed pretty much all my life, even as a kid. I'm currently in college and as time has gone by the depression has only gotten worse despite therapy and meds. The main problem is that my interest lies in things which don't exist (supernatural beings and such) and there are no jobs that sound even vaguely interesting to me. The only times I've ever been happy, even as a little kid, have been when I'm daydreaming and fantasizing. In other words, the "real world" means virtually nothing to me and brings me pretty much no pleasure. I fear that the best I'll ever get out of life is to be able to tolerate life, even if I do well and get a good job and such.

The idea that I'll never really enjoy life is really scary, mostly because I can't imagine things being any better. My doc of course says things will get better and I'll enjoy life, but she doesn't really get what it's like to be me. So I decided to ask you guys what your thoughts were. I'd like to know how happy you are over-all (not how happy you are with your life or anything, just the sheer "happy/sad" over time). Also, if you have any tips for how to be happier please share them. I'm in a lot of pain right now and I can't stand the doctors saying "Thing will get better" so blindly, so please be honest.

It also might be worth noting that I also have Schizoid Personality Disorder (probably caused by the Asperger's) which is just an extreme version of introversion. I've never been in love (or had even a tiny crush, for that matter) and children sicken me (I just can't stand them) so ideas like getting married and having a family are in no way something for me to look forward to. So please don't try to use those things to make me feel better. Other than that, anything goes.

Thanks in advance for the info.

0 - very depressed.

very

I'm not sure right now what to say about life as an overall whole.
It is easier for me to look at it in parts.
The overall whole global view is just too overwhelming, I need smaller bites.
I am content to have my own place, my cat, my trains, my wife.
I am distressed at not being able to actually live in the same apartment with my wife.

It is often difficult for me to tell what is situational and what is the constant baseline.

A lot of times it feels like I'm just passing time till I die.

Here's what would go throuogh my head and heart in response to that

Umm, excuse me Doc, I am NOT at where things WILL be.
I AM at where things ARE being.
Right here.
Right now.
I am not experiencing the future, I am experiencing the present

The future may or may not do what it will: what I need is to make it through right now existing reality, not some hypothetical could be, maybe.

I am blessed in that I have never (to my knowledge) suffered from depression or anxiety.

That being said, the first thing that crossed my mind as I read your interests was, "I wonder if he writes."

There are many people earning a good living writing, editing and publishing fantasy and science fiction; RPG game materials, etc.

With self 10 I have no problem with who I am, being autistic or any of my differences,
but I do have a problem with society in general at times

Getting towards 0, meaning over the last month or so i have seriously contemplated suicide. I think theres a nice cliff up the road that i could jump off

1 - I don't wanna die but I don't wanna live either. It was always like that and I'm afraid it will remain so.

Being on the spectrum often a journey of discovery which takes time and to be honest when I first was diagnosed I was 0 but its like the process has gone full circle and now for the first time in my life I am content with myself, I now realize I am not a word or a label, I have many neurological complexities and by allowing, understanding I now can simply accept and be, a unique individual like everyone is

I usually range from 3-7 so I voted 5.

It's worth remembering that chasing happiness as a goal is pretty much guaranteed to make you unhappy much of the time.

If you focus on being honest, empathetic, kind, productive, and other such things, you'll wind up happy at least some of the time as a result of being those things.

3 for me. Still very frustrated that my AS always seems to get in the way of me having a sig other relationship no matter what I do.

I guess around 4-2. I don't think I have a "good" life, but I'm still young, and obviously, there are alot of people who have it alooottt worse than I do.

Southwestforests, I couldn't have said it better. Your whole message was like taking thoughts out of my brain and writing them down. This quote especially:

Visagrunt, as it happens, I do write. I also draw. The problem is that I'm not very creative, so doing my own art/writing doesn't amount to much even if I do it well. I have considered editing writing for a living since I'm very good with grammar, punctuation, and such, but it would be a fall-back job. Not my first pick. Thanks for the idea, though.

Asplanet, I'm with you 100%. I have absolutely no issues with myself. In fact I feel like I'm the sane one and all the rest of the world is crazy. I have major issues with society as a whole and because of its flaws this world is so hard to live in. But I couldn't be much happier with who I am.

Passaggia

That's exactly how I feel. I've never been suicidal (I think it would be wrong to hurt my friends and family like that) but I seriously wish I wasn't alive. Every day I wish I had never been born.

HH, I totally know what you're saying. I do my best to do well and be a good person, but so far it hasn't paid off much.

DarkBBastion, I'm the same way. I consider myself to be blessed with a good life, but for some reason I can't seem to enjoy it. And that just makes me feel guilty when I think about people who are in WAY worse situations than me. I'm glad I'm not one of them, but I wish I could put one of them in my place and just not exist anymore.

I suppose that I am legally an adult now, although I act and seem much younger.

I am very happy. There are so many things in this world that I love. I have accepted myself, accept others and always try to see the best in everyone. There are things for me that are very difficult, but I get through them. I don't let anxieties diminish my overall happiness - I leave them where they were and forget about them. The small things in this world make me happy - a good book, a decent grade, writing, a smile off a friend, singing a song...

I have been depressed in the past. But things changed since then. I can't tell you how I got rid of it, except that it passed, and I hope it will pass for everyone else who is unhappy, too.