he still won't leave it alone.

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Hang in there kiddo. I agree with aspyoz the cutting isn't gonna help. You are stronger than that, you are stronger than I will ever be I know that much, you are WrongPlanet's little lioness!

i was stronger.
now i'm just damaged goods again.
i can't keep fixing myself.

If anyone can you can (sorry that's a cliché). I wish I had the right words. F**king hands are shaking again.

You're not "damaged goods" because you're not property. You're a living, breathing person with feelings. It hurts you because you're a good person who doesn't do this kind of thing to other people. When people violate us like this, there's no excuse for it, there's no justification for it and it turns our world upside down.

Rely on Stefan. Chris is not a man. Chris has a penis but he's not a man. Stefan is a man. Rely on Stefan.

You will need rape counseling. It makes a world of difference by the third session.

And, for goodness sakes, both of you MOVE. In most US States, if there's been a crime committed against you at the home, you're allowed to break your lease.

please try and not do it, its not you in control when you cut yourself, its him still



You'll never be damaged goods to those who really like (like us) and love you (Stefan is one of those people.)

i never had rape counseling before. i'll be fine. i just need time.

I'm so sorry he's put you through all this. You did NOT deserve it. He is a horrible person, and deserves to be in prison.
Have they offered you any counselling?

yes. but i said no.
i don't like things like that.
i've never used them before.

Counselling can help sometimes, especially to reassure you that you aren't to blame.
You need to take care of yourself first though, so if you don't feel ready for it right now you could always get counselling later on.

i just re-read this thread.
i'm such a whiny b***h.

i've dealt with worse and never complained this much.
least i have someone to talk to and a roof over my head which is an
improvement over last time something like this happened.

Hun, you aren't whiny. If I'd been through what you've been through lately I'd be curled up in a ball sobbing.

You're not whiny. Are you okay now?

i'll be fine.
i always have to be.

It's okay to not be. :\

no, no it's not.
i have to be okay.
i'll just suck it up and deal with it.

I don't think you have to be anything. Let out your anger or whatever you feel if you need to. Buy a punch bag and be like, "See you in Hell, punch bag" and go to f***ing work on it.