Report on my Aspie meet - sob!

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wow - that sucks but wtg sticking it out!

And seriously - the organizers count on the ASPIE GRAPEVINE to desseminate information? Really? Unbelievable.

I think random man on the street may have been your aspie angel... I found THAT an incredibly bright spot in an otherwise rough evening. just think, all the others will be easy from now on! The hard part is past.

Personally, I think you handled it great. I would have just walked away without doing anything about it, so I really admire you for that. The organizers are idiots. I hope you'll be able to go to a meet-up in the future.

They're not idiots. They're kind, well-meaning people really. They're just rather clueless.

I thought I would feel better this morning.

I feel a gazillion times worse.

You could at least say what state or country you are located in on your profile. That would help others in the area spot you and maybe try to do a meetup.

OK!



I've put my location. How do I make it show my age?

I can't see an actual box in which to type my age. Is it done by making one's DOB public and allowing the software to work out how old you are?

I think it's as easy as that...

you got it up and running.


aaand I think Emlion is the one forum member here that would be closest to you. Well, at least in Scotland. Careful though.. she's crazy fun insane .

Yeah, you're right. I guess I was just mad that something like that happened. If I think about it, stuff like that happens with other events. I'm sorry if I made you feel worse.

I'm sorry about what happened. Get plenty of rest and take care of yourself.

Oh, don't worry Evil Eyes. It wasn't YOU that made me feel worse! LOL How could it have been?

It was crying for ages and staying up late and feeling like all hope in life is gone - you know. THAT kind of thing!

That sucks, sorry you had to put up with it, people always seem to mess up like that.

Sounds like those organizers were utterly clueless. I know that if I organize any aspie meetups or events for aspies in my area (which I do veeery occasionally, cause organizing stuff is stressful haha) I tend to arrange it down to the enth detail - I'm super precise with location, time, activity schedule, transport, etc etc. Plus I give everyone my mobile number and run around trying to collect everyone to make sure nobody gets lost.

I'm sorry about what happened all_white, and it DEFINITELY wasn't your fault in any way. I think you deserve an apology, not them just shrugging it off.

They have a meet up section on the website aspie village OP? Is that what you were refering to in your post?

Sorry for what happened to you by the way. I have no social life and i'm always either panicking and getting lost when i'm in strange city or going to the wrong place when i'm in my own town.

Hope things go your way one day!

You should come down south. It's not so far away on the train and there are many of us down here. I'll answer your post in a little more detail later.

No problem. The Haven is as good a place as any.



OK.



At least you have your sense of humour. Be thankful for that.



That's funny. I do, but I always feel like I'm alone when I'm out. I've travelled to many places (but I've never been from Barnsley to Peru!) but I don't go out on my own much. Around the town - I feel safe enough there - but other than that, generally nowhere without someone.



It's a pub. You go dressed - more or less - with what you feel comfortable in. Normal clothes are fine.



The non-Aspie friendliness of pubs depends, more or less, on how tolerant of individualism they are I think. Lots of places don't like anyone who is different from the norm. You might have more luck in serious real ale pubs that aren't posh, although you might end up with more than you originally bargained for. (Like a love of real ale. And, being a lady, you'll get plenty of interest. I find the idea of a woman drinking real ale very sexy - dominant, if you like.)



I've been in pubs like that. Not for being Asperger's though. But it was a very scary experience all the same.



Get yourself a pint and sit down somewhere quiet. Look like you're not interested in conversation but that might be difficult being a wummin. Being a tubby fella who looks like he's got learning difficulties means that no-one wants to talk to me though.



You're just having a quiet drink. On your own. Why would anyone think you're being weird just for doing that?! Do keep an eye on who is looking to approach you though. Notice the differences (if any) between entering patrons.

Though if no-one turned up I can understand and sympathise with your worries. I'd be pretty worried too.



You wouldn't necessarily expect them to, would you? If it's a small gathering, it's only a group of people.



Not good.



I'm sorry to hear that.



He's probably just like you underneath, or has similar personality traits. People are not all hateful idiots, even if we sometimes might think otherwise.



- there are kind people in this world. They're part of the denormalised - they have reason to stick up for you.



They sound like tossers.



Try to go out and about more often if there are things you want to do. That way if you want to go out somewhere it won't quite be so hard for you. Just a thought.

If it was me I'd find it quite scary. I wouldn't meet with the organisers again for that. Morons.

Yeah, okay so I'd have had a meltdown - all that anxiety building like that, eeep!
*hugs*

I've not been to any sort of meet-up yet, I've joined one though so I get letters through the door about when and where these things are, they are sure to give details of where such meet-ups are located and helpful little things like how much money I should expect to take, which I think shows a wonderful understanding of aspie anxiety over such meet-ups. I hope mine will meet in a pub...I'm okay in pubs, you can be casual and look like you're not there to meet a group of 'specials' - granted I'd not have asked the bar staff about such a meeting, that I'd imagine made your a lot more aaaarrrrhhhhhhhgggggg than anything really.

Organisers of your meet-up were totally useless, not just in not making sure that you actually knew where you were going, but if it was a regular thing than the bar staff should have known something about it to have been able to help you out, and they should be like mine and give little details like exactly what to expect of the meet-up. Some organisers and groups can suck like that though, it's just a shame that you were caught-up in their uselessness.

We do REALLY need a meet-up section on these forums...or just a general location-specific set of forums for meet-ups and location-specific services, diagnosis, pathway to diagnosis, aspie-friendly places, non-aspie friendly places, places or events of interest, etc. etc.