Gone , medical emegency .
...As I said , the kind of touch-up - my beard , hair , coloring the beard , maybe the hair , maybe some take-home coloring to extend the coloring before I have to go to the hair-ist's again to do it , and I sort of assume you'd be expected to tip a bit...costs more than I have to spare .
Not even a stand-up lantern/mini-light (Remember , only one , in a less accessible corner , plug in the entire room so looking for 100% battery-operated ones .) , remember , to ease my reading
., remember , as far as my money/etc. goes now . The LEDs are probably better than any standard round flashlight I'd could easily find , they're probably more reliable and better (tho not perfect)...mass-market stuff tends to be made so shittily these days ! !! !! !! !!
When I was in jail in 2013 I talked about wanting to get a hair touch-up , over three years ago - I still haven't
.
Thank you to Data , I sleep in underpants (Certainly now) ~ I'm not wild about going to the hospital AGAIN (if not truly needed , obviously) , the fact that it cuts off my access to the Internet/'puters 100% a major reason for that ~ My life just goes on a dead freeze , halt , when I'm in the hospital .
Yeah....those pinto beans! That'll do it!
_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!
...I thought someone would console me re: taking the present money .
Briefly , my brother's birthday was today , I managed to call , at least
.
_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!
Oh, are you feeling guilty about your brother's birthday? It sounds like your needs are much more immediate than birthday presents. Plus, birthday stuff doesn't have to cost a lot of money, when you are eventually able. I'm sure your brother wouldn't want you sleeping in filth just so he could get a present. If he does, that would make him a mean brother anyhow. That's good that you managed to get to a phone and call him. You mentioned how difficult it can be to get to a phone. I also can't imagine how awful it must be to keep buying the same things over and over, only to have them broken or stolen. I also hope you are feeling better now and don't need the diapers anymore to keep your bedding clean, as underpants certainly won't do it.
...It's underwear I wear .
Yesterday I bought yet MORE ~ Perhaps I shouldn't have , but I go through so much , and though I do not throw them all away - The underwear I had on last night wasn't greatly stained , I put it aside to wash ~ As I said , many are so extremely poopy , I don't want to keep them around .
As I said elsewhere , the AT&T cheap phone appears to have repaired itself , at least to getting YT and text-only Web stuff , I now think I'll re-buy the $25 for a month via my plan .
Clothes-wise , I have just three sets of pants , all jeans - and all with at least some stain on the jeans themselves that seeped from the underwear , IIRC .
I'm not that totally dedicated to blue jeans ~ Partly , it's that I tend to go near entirely (especially now that the nearby Goodwill was mean to me
) all the time for clothes to the Target near me ~ An exception to the " no suburban/All-/Middle American retail chains accessible to me " comment I have made , a smaller City Target ~ since they have at least some clothes that fit me ~ I am a very weird size , big waist - but with my top-of-pants size having so wildly fluctuated these last months
, it is difficult to even find something that fits me and I often must have belts to just keep them up (which I prefer anyway - however , more on belts later) ~ But , I have short legs , literally even a 30" leg length is pretty long on me - Jeans have the " roll-up " pants leg tradition and there's maybe not much else affordable at that Target - There's some men's slacks that are fairly undistinguished , I bought some once , and sorta expensive .
I have two pair of full-length BJs , and one pair of denim shorts . At this time , one of them ae , in my judgement , too dirty to wear , two aren't , I keep them separate on the clothes chest drawers along with the shirts for outside , which I have three outer shirts IIRC (+ undershirts) , if I separate them . I have to go to a laundromat to wash , it isn't that far away but I'm reluctant , and the underwear lets me strech it out not going some more .
As far as blue jeans go , a part of me is living in the past ~ in 1956/Jack Kerouac days , before I was born , when wearing blue jeans was , I guess , " new and revolutionary "/" bohemia "~ or in 1971 , the " Easy Rider "/" youthquake " era , when it was " revolutionary "/" the youth uniform " ~ Never mind that I was alive (as a pre-teen) back then , and avoided blue jeans , I thought that they were scratchy , and , in fact , not just then but for many years I would not wear BLs ~ I remember in the mid-70s being at an outdoor thing at my school and being turned off by everyone wearing the BJs " uniform " ~ And then I do it myself ? " Each man becomes the thing he hates "
?
Again , just three sets of pants . Two belts , all three pants need them to stay up
.
I wear this 2nd-hand sports jacket all the time , and likewise this camo vest under it , which I keep all my stuff in - The jacket is large but not really large enough - It is constricting on the shoulders , and especially on the neck (No doubt helped bu how much I keep in it) ~ Getting something really really large would be expensive .
I want to again get a button-upable , long-sleeved , striped/plaid shirt which I could wear sometimes with the checked sports jacket ~ Clash of colors !
~ and , a tie , which I tell myself I'd wear with the long-sleeved shirt to church ~ Except , hm , maybe I've " talked "/thought about this more than I've actually done it
.
Remember , now no good , stand-alone , nightlight , no stereo , no TV .
I am still - VERY
- worried about that excessive glare and my eyes , too ! !! !! !! !! !!
_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!
...The sports jacket also has become discolored on one side somehow , maybe , lying in some grass/dirt at U.N. Plaza , it discolored it somehow
?
I got those sports jackets for having a lot of pockets to carry things in . I sort of like nicly " tacky/small-time businessman at the country club " checked/plaid ones
.
It later occurred me that I was , sort of , reflecting the old-style B-movie/comic book representation of a homeless person going around in a blown-out suit - Even a derby? fedora? hat and a tie ! Though I didn't have those , really... - tipping his hat and saying " Greetings , madam ! Might I have the pleasure of a taste of your fine victuals ? " , like that .
I have only one set of shoes now , as I decided to demote the other ones to inside-the-place only " clogs " , for when I don't have shoes on and am going to the bathroom of preparing to put shoes on .
That means I have only one set of outdoor shoes (and I haven't gotten a scissors to cut the other sandals into clogs ~ after all that time in shelters where they wouldn't let you have a scissors
, perhaps I am affected by that , for one) .
I'd have o spend more money to get a new second pair of shoes ~ or new clogs for indoors
.
_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!
...I should say that I did get some 2nd-hand sheets , which party substituted or what I lost ~ Not as much , IIRC , as what I lost in the really bad poop-soaking
but I have some sheets now .
My left leg really aches , a lot of the time , there's a stabbing pain and s**t
. I worry about an infection getting it amputated
.
I see so many wheelchaired amputees around here
.
_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!
...Thank you . Yes , I'm Type 2 diabetic , and already had 2&1/2 toes go that way .
Now , I thought guiltily that I was maybe being hypocondriac-ish(Sp??) in getting as alarmed-expressing as I was there , but I wrote it .
I couldn't get to a computer for the last 2?? days...........
_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!
...I was going to do free laundry at my place tonight , reserved a time , but , not having been able to use a computer yesterday , wanted to stay here longer .
Perhaps that was unwise .
_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!
...I went to the hospital (Facebook General Hospital ~ so to speak) and got the X-ray , I don't know what the verdict is .
I really am worried
that the glare in my room could hurt/reduce the strength of my vision .
I need more clothes , but that would take funds .
_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!
...I felt rather bad today , after I got up and forced myself to goout ~ to get food , and get to this computer situation .
I partly wanted to stay in my bed , but , it's a lousy bed , too , and there's the " lead/mercury " nastiness in there , not to mention the excessive light...
The state of my leg has me walking rather slow (Though I suppose less slow than the height of the hobbled
-ness some months ago) , and it being hard to keep my balance .
_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!
...Yesterday , Sunday , it was really bad once I got out
, my walking was so ducky-legged
that I didn't take a trip to a movie at the Castro Theater via the trolley on Market Street that runs directly by me , as I , after doing what I wanted/had to do , it was so near the time of the movie , and I just stayed within aone-block radius or so of my place , and at least go a little sun , sitting on pavement , at least with sun on me , going through the Sunday paper .
I had felt so yucchy getting out of the place , I really think that " lead/mercury " has at least some effect on me , plus my wanting to get more sleep but forcing myself to go , I need to get stuff ~ Plus , with the amount of light in my room I can't quite get good enough sleep , even if I do get to sleep
.
Again , to-day , I was yuchhy and hurting in the leg and crying/whining my usual down-ness about how I missed " the college experience " , I wanted to lie down , but I had to do things ~ come here , to this computer lab ~ and , I went to this little bit of " grass " (actually now almost all dirt/ground , they must have consiously decided to " de-grass " it) at UN Plaza and did lie down , cried/whined , and experience some warmth shining on me , maybe dozed off a little , did feel better when I finished .
I really think the " lead/mercury in my room (and , okay , maybe helped along by my housekeeping) and the excssive sun/glare - and the lumpy/hardish bed
- are a hurting factor ! ![]()
_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!
...I have .(Read at least - two?? The Dharma Bums and Big Sur ? - of his others in that " This is me and my cool friends , under different names " series . I read of that issued-this-century " the orignal unedited roll " of On The Road getting issued , too ~ which included reference to the occasional we're-just-boys-playing-around M/M sex he and Neal Cassady indulged in , obviously unthinkable to publish during the 50s) . As I recall , J.K.'s experience (as he described it in the novel) was reasonably decent .
Of course , most of my homelessness has been THE ABSOLUTE OPPOSITE of J.K.'s storied experience ~ I stay in the same place almost all the time ! !! !! !! !! !! Even in the same town , I am in a very limited basic area , and was like that even before I was - as - semi-crippled as I am now !
(Having even noticed that about me even before , IIRC , I even thought that I was AS ,) That's one of the " Aspie " things there are about me as I see it ! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!
_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!
Last edited by ASS-P on 08 Aug 2016, 9:13 pm, edited 1 time in total.
