have you ever felt like a creepy stalker?

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Joined: 18 Dec 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 144
Location: Germany

13 Jan 2007, 2:00 pm

I don't, but during a holiday, while I was walking lonely (since I have no friends) through a foreign city for sightseeing, I noticed some guy following me during quite a while, didn't know what he wanted of me, didn't want to find it out either. I finally lost him with a suprising manouvre, escaping through the metro. And no, it was not a persecution mania.

remescen
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21 Jan 2007, 5:39 am

Lemmiwinks wrote:

I become obsessed with people, and not so much things, or subjects like astronomy, etc. So when I like some one usualy a pretty girl, that is all I think about....it engulfs me, and my thoughts.

This never leads to me doing anything against their wishes, because I hold their respect, and opinions to the utmost degree. But It has creeped out a few girls back in high school.

Up until a month ago or so for the last 3 years I stayed away from any type of connection with a girl because I didn't want this to happen. But I don't know if it will happen again where I creep someone out...because I hate the feeling.

That really strikes a chord with me...I have loved very deeply girls that are basically acquaintances, but I respect them as women so much that I don't even go near them. I just admire them from afar while they pervade my every thought for months, years even. But I am not capable of stalking because I am NOT a creep, I just dont know how to initiate a relationship. That is the main reason I am dateless, girlfriend-less, partner-less and that is why I will be forever and always have been.

I hate the feeling of being seen as a creep as well and I do everything I can to avoid it, which is probably irrational and why I can't get close to anyone. I guess I just have a weird thought process that decides that every person I ever like thinks I'm a perverted psycho that wants to rape and murder them. And how very very far from the truth that is...

I just want a simple, loving and reciprocated relationship with someone whom I can share my life and be happy with. Man its depressing being me...

remescen
Tufted Titmouse

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21 Jan 2007, 5:56 am

krex wrote:

I am such a creepy stalker.If I wasnt, I would have had very few relationships ,because guys didnt persue me..It was my persistence and one track obsession,that has worn down the resistance of several guys.
I would find out their schedules in school and make sure I was in the vicinity(just to see them),write them poems,letters,make art for them.Some of them were probably creeped out but others were flattered and we would end up in a relationship.This just reinforced my stalking behavior.I think I am finally past the stalking phase and have managed to stay in the same relationship for 4 years...my personal record.

Does anyone think that a girl would be flattered in a similar situation? Im in love with a NT girl right now and all I can think of to try and win her heart is writing a love letter...since I can't tell her in person of course.

Deathklaat
Deinonychus

Joined: 3 Dec 2007
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05 Dec 2007, 1:50 pm

Lemmiwinks wrote:

when I like someone that is all I think about. I have loved girls that are acquaintances, but I respect them so much that I don't go near them. I just admire them from afar while they pervade my every thought for months, years even. I just don't know how to initiate a relationship. That is the main reason I am dateless, girlfriend-less, partner-less and that is why I will be forever and always have been. I hate the feeling of being seen as a creep and do everything to avoid it, which is probably irrational and why I can't get close to anyone. I guess I just have a weird thought process that decides that every person I ever like thinks I'm a perverted psycho that wants to rape and murder them. And how far from the truth that is...I just want a simple, loving and reciprocated relationship with someone whom I can share my life and be happy with. its depressing being me...

Holy crap. When I first read this, I almost cried. The truth is, i know exactly how you feel right now. I'm about 17 and have had this problem ever since sixth grade. It's ridiculous because I also am incredibly insecure, which I think may be the reason why you and I have trouble initiating relationships. I am truly, very very sorry that you feel this way, because I know how horrible and dark it feels to have that lonely feeling inside your chest. I have felt this many times when I walk amongst people who are talking and all of a sudden they just stop. I don't know.

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Last edited by Deathklaat on 06 Dec 2007, 10:03 am, edited 1 time in total.

Deathklaat
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05 Dec 2007, 1:53 pm

remescen wrote:

all I can think of to try and win her heart is writing a love letter...since I can't tell her in person of course.

If you have the guts to write the letter, more power to you, because you're showing a helluva lot more guts than I can. I've been in this situation before and I wanted to write a love letter confessing my feelings for that girl, but I was afraid that I'd come off as a creepy stalker. Were you going to sign the letter or make it anonymous?

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Last edited by Deathklaat on 06 Dec 2007, 9:57 am, edited 1 time in total.

samtoo
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05 Dec 2007, 5:18 pm

I could very easily be mistaken for a creepy stalker. I'm not though.

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Tim_Tex
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05 Dec 2007, 5:32 pm

I worry that if I were dating an NT, I wouldn't be able to trust her, and would have to "stalk" her to find out if she's seeing another guy behind my back.

If I were dating an Aspie, I could automatically trust her.

Tim

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fivecents
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06 Dec 2007, 1:05 am

I was doing research about stalking (my work is research) and I found a UK study about percentages of stalkers who are AS. “Stalkers” don’t read social cues. Ok, really, true stalkers are not nice guys/girls who want an nice relationship/friendship but are given conflicting social cues. Stalkers select someone, idealize them and…

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GoatOnFire
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06 Dec 2007, 3:53 am

It's funny, I used to be upset that I came off this way. I would try not to come off that way but I think that there was something about my stare that made it seem that way no matter what.

Now I actually stalk people. Not for any other reason but to see if they freak out, though. It's fun.

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Deathklaat
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06 Dec 2007, 10:04 am

Tim_Tex wrote:

I worry that if I were dating an NT, I wouldn't be able to trust her, and would have to "stalk" her to find out if she's seeing another guy behind my back. If I were dating an Aspie, I could automatically trust her.Tim

I know exactly how you feel, man.

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Deathklaat
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06 Dec 2007, 10:05 am

krex wrote:

Does anyone think that a girl would be flattered in a similar situation?

Hmmmmmmmmm...maybe flattered, maybe scared.

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Tim_Tex
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06 Dec 2007, 10:10 am

likedcalico wrote:

i've never followed anyone around but voted 'maybe' because everytime I go to Spokane, I always have to go tp the neighborhood where Benny & Joon was filmed and see the house they lived in. I look at it, stare at it, even walk down to the river and look up at it. I always have to fight the urge to look in through the windows and knocking on the front door.

I just really want to know more about the movie and the filming of it there. Maybe I'd be lucky when I get caught by someone, that person lets me ask him or her questions about the area and the movie.

If you're just visiting a neighborhood, then it isn't stalking.

Tim

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mightyzebra
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06 Dec 2007, 1:26 pm

Usually I feel STRANGELY like people are stalking ME...

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06 Dec 2007, 2:01 pm

Deathklaat wrote:

Lemmiwinks wrote:

For me, the stopped conversations happened less as my generation got older. I still do the worship from afar, and that's not good at 51. Write the letter, do what you have to, learn to interact, try to find someone.

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nirrti_rachelle
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06 Dec 2007, 6:01 pm

I am the creepy stalker. :lol:

People who are completely normal and have anything good going for them wouldn't notice me if I was on fire. So if I want any of them to be my friend, lover or whatever, I feel I have to do all the pursuing just so they know I even exist.

Interestingly, homeless men, crackheads, drunks, the mentally ill and such don't have a problem noticing me at all. :roll:

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06 Dec 2007, 6:51 pm

I would never want to be a creepy stalker. I would like to be able to trust people again (I began distrusting NTs after my first girlfriend cheated on me).

Tim

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