Dear "You"...From "Me"-Letters Unsent

Post Reply New Topic

I don't understand.

I don't like the way my brain works, other people like that aspect of me more & the cognitive dissonance is astounding. Other people also disapprove of my social (in)abilities yet still appreciate me as a person & I find myself with no clue how to respond.

I'm sorry for complaining in the process of realizing this & I want to be in touch more with everyone as soon as I can, I just feel like my wacky emotions are unwelcome.

_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos

I don't trust anyone anymore. People are too quick to bite each other's heads off today. The ability to hurt others is not a skill, your cultivation of it is a behavioral disorder.

Sincerely, some autistic fool with no emotions you're capable of acknowledging.

Just because I seem "off" doesn't make everything about me wrong. Same goes for anyone.

_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos

Am I bitter? Today, yeah. I'm getting bad vibes from nowhere lately. I don't feel accepted & I can sense something wrong.

_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos

ooh look at you being all so f*****g precious and perfect and pretty. I hate you. I hate you.

Dear everyone: Social media has f****d up our heads, no ifs, ands or buts. It's everyone & our heads are being f****d up by some fancy programs.

It's a badly broken code. Just because some code runs OK doesn't mean it should run our lives. I opted out & social media is still interfering in my life.

I don't believe all the high-strung nonsense I hear from anyone anymore. If you legitimately believe the internet can represent human beings fully, then why do so many people use branded networks to interact? Are names & faces not enough anymore? Is hostility everyone's default now? Do we really need to base our sense of self on how well we can exclude others from our lives?

I'm not OK with silicon valley billionaires making our decisions for us in advance. I don't believe in electronic negativity. I actually work with technology instead of using it to demean people who are different from me. I think everyone has been sold on total subservience to a corporate agenda instead of giving a damn about each other.

_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos

I hate you. I wish we had never met. I hate the loss of our friendship. You meant something to me. I loved our stupid little text conversations. You have no idea how much you hurt me. You were the first guy i liked who asked me out.

I hate my life. Why does no one ever like me.

Why didn't you love me? Why wasnt i enough? Why will no one else take the time.

I'm sorry but I honestly don't really see what's actually going on here. Very few people talk to me directly.

I feel cornered & misunderstood. I have to go to sleep so I can wake up & continue being meaningless to people tomorrow.

I don't want any social involvement that runs the course of disrespect & binary views of relationships.

_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos

I don't really see you as a hateful person & this dialog isn't tracking logically for me.

_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos

I don't value online anonymity in the context of any direct conversation.

I miss my friends.

_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos

A lot of people hate me for the way my mind works (or doesn't work), for whay it's worth I'm desperately sorry it's such an apparent disappointment.

None of you want to know where I came from.

I don't want to be around here anymore.

_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos

Honestly people terrify the hell out of me & I should move off the grid, preferably where it's gonna take some geography homework to find my useless hacker ass.

WTF society stop it.

_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos

I can be contacted directly any number of ways.

_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos

I never exactly believed anyone wanted me around in my entire life. Here I am painted into some confusing autistic corner again & that makes it difficult to believe otherwise.

I have had the s**t beat out of me for being autistic so don't expect direct answers from mixed messages I receive. I have no equlity anywhere I ever go in any way & so I cannot know what the hell a friendship really is. No matter how close I may be to anyone, I'll f**k something up & it's like people want to kill me.

I've seen enough vicious rage on the part of people close to me to know when my being direct is called for. I fully intend to insure some standard of common respect in my presence & I don't owe anyone a sugar-coated explanation of my reasons why.

I don't come from the fairytale people would prefer me to have come from. What I come with is gratitude & respect. No excuses.

_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos

I need to be alone today.

_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos