Dear "You"...From "Me"-Letters Unsent

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For my doctaaaa

Just because I am on the spectrum or that we share the same diagnoses does not mean you can unmask and act rude towards me in your own home. I am not interested in sports, I don't care about facts and trivia about them, boring Just get the the point when you talk, I dont care about other details or you will never get to the point and I will just get lost in what you are saying. You kept interrupting me when I was telling you about my day out and it was like you didn't care about my day, you kept ignoring my questions when I would ask you. You didn't care about my safety when I had lights on so I could see when I was walking around and looking for my things, was it not obvious to you what I was doing? It would be like me telling you to turn the light off when I see you doing laundry. You knew I was coming and knew months in advance but your night owl routine was so damn important than me and you let me down with our plans. Next time I will just bring my kids and stay in a hotel if I decide to see you again and we can talk online because at least you won't ignore my questions and interrupt me. I can't talk to you online without feeling angry. I wish I could tell you all this but I don't have the balls to.

I've turned out the be the opposite that you raised be to be. I prefer Germany over Britain, I'm masculine and I do not have a stiff upper lip. What do you have to say about that? Are you going to send me to my room or disown me. I gave the two of you a break this summer, because my love for Germany has intensified as the summer went on.

Thank you for sniggering at my many shortcomings, it's been a useful guage. I don't have a clue about some things, as you know so well.
I hope you have someone to snigger at your shortcomings too, they don't belong to "the condition", they're all yours!

That's you that is!

I buzz myself up on coffee each morning because it changes my mood and maybe my personality. I will jack myself up as high as a kite on that one cup of instant coffee until you apologize for nit picking about the fact that I cry more often than you and Dean. You don't like it when people cry just like my mum, so why not drink the coffee? Coffee brings out the Cockney in me.

Thanks so much for screwing everything up and leaving us in the lurch. You could have said something two weeks ago instead of putting yourself first and jeopardising everything for everyone else. Now it's like you're virtue signalling and giving us no choice. We feel judged and played even though I'm sure it wan't your intention.

Is this how things work on your side? What are the boundaries like, there? I can't imagine they'd put up with this but you expect me to grin and bear it? At what cost? How many times? None of this would have happened if you did a little google search at the beginning, or if you stopped to think about the fallout. I'm not a lackey or a doormat but when shite like this goes down, it's how you make me feel.

I had so much faith in you. I don't want to believe it was malicious. I want to believe you're doing what's right. I hope I'm reading too much into everything but even if I'm not, I feel hurt. So does she. You have no idea. I really can't imagine this happening the other way around, and that's what bugs me most. You've mucked it all up, and now I don't know what to do.

Actually, I do know.

Sometimes I have to put my heart first and do what I know is right. This is one of those times. You might not like it, and it may make waves, but ... tough. Some day you might understand what it's like to be me.

Happy Birthday!

Live large and have a drink on me!

Dear B,

You told me that I don't need to eat very much. You've planted a very dangerous seed in my mind. There's a 5 week month coming up and because of what you told me this morning, I will be eating canned meat burgers for dinner again for the next 5 weeks. I might even be drinking two cups of coffee each morning. They say that weight is a personal thing, but it's got more to do with money. Don't cry when I no longer look like Schultz in the spring because I care more about money than I do about food. It's money, money, money. Characters and body types have nothing to do with it. You've planted an ugly seed and now you can have the pleasure of watching it grow. The young ladies in our town will fall to the ground when they see how much I look like Mick Avory once again after 25 years. All this, because I care more about my money than I care about food.

Dear The Sun,

Please bug off and explode already. Stop illuminating the world with your blinding carcinogens.

No one likes you anyway.

You can incinerate Daylight Savings while you're at it.

Issy

PS -- Please send fuzzy blankets instead.

Dear you,

I appreciate you have mental health problems but you need to be more aware of other people and try to get more friends/girlfriend. You are miserable on your own, you need to have a laugh now and then and try and be less uptight.

Paul

For my brother with love,

Take another shot of courage
Wonder why the right words never come
You just get numb




Tequila Sunrise - Eagles

Dear Ronny. I’ts been over a year since I wrote here to the old you. Sadly you took too long to start mending that bridge. I still love you but you have to stop gaming all the time. If you were a streamer I would understand but you deliberately just play games even when you’ve completed all you have. I hate coming home to you playing video games into the late night and never even talking with me. You hurt me so bad 2021. I’m terrified that I’m never going to recover. I lost my dad last year and my uncle rick and you don’t even notice how I’m hurting. Or you just choose not to care. I miss all you were. And I truly wish it will get better

I would just like to know, through whatever avenue... are you ok?

I remember when we used to say this would never happen - that it couldn't happen - and we made safeguards just in case. Fat lot of good that did. I flip back and forth between "Oh, I get it!" and "WTFFFFF ??! ! .....", which is where I'll have to leave it for my own sanity.

It doesn't make sense and probably never will, although I'm sure you've got it all figured out on your end. You know I can't read between the lines or make inferences. You know everything about me, but maybe that was the problem all along.

Dear,

You lied about my post history on Reddit, now on Twitter I saw you were upset someone did a reaction video about you telling lies about you. Pot kettle black. You decided to make a video on another user, someone disagrees because it's their friend so they do a reaction video by responding to your claims. Then you cowardly remove that video and it makes you look guilty. You say the other person who is staying silent means what you say is true, well by your own logic, removing that video makes it look like you lied about her. Don't want people to see it huh? If you're innocent, why hide the video you posted? And if you do a video about someone, even if you think it's true based on hearsay, don't be upset when someone does a video about you saying their own opinion about you. You say you want to hold people accountable, well what if I wanted to hold you accountable so I do a video about you where you have lied about me and lied about them calling you a pedophile and you acting like you own the community. Don't get upset about it if someone does it.

You don't lie about others online and then be upset when someone lies about you and one other thing, I didn't hear anywhere in the video where they called you a pedophile. Another lie you just told.