Where is my place?

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I did go to the support group yesterday, but the only female Aspie there was already in a relationship.

The whole reason I transferred to Texas State was because there were no single, female Aspies in Wichita Falls, where I had previously lived. There are no single, female Aspies in San Marcos, either.

Now, my only hope is that somebody will just drop everything and move to San Marcos, for no reason.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but it seems like you're putting too much planning and preparation into a friendship yet to happen. "The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry." I still have trouble establishing friendships, also, for similar reasons. What seems painfully obvious to me is that spontaniety and synchronicity are the sparks of any friendship. Any friendship based on planning or preparation is doomed to fail because a friendship is not a static structure that must be built based on a blueprint of preferences, rather it has to have energy, flow, and enough ambiguity to keep things dynamic. This dynamic nature eventually matures into an emotional pattern of reliability and validity that may take months or years to develop--of course, this is still dependent on the a level of unspoken consensuality and agreement on what "reliable" and "valid" means between both individuals.

So you can see why I have trouble making friends... It's because my "scientific" way of seeing things often disables the "magic" of spontaniety and synchronicity. I've basically shot myself in the foot before I even say "Hello."

You can't plan out or prepare for a kindred soul. Most people understand this since childhood, I'm just figuring this out in recent years and still coming to terms with it.

I still wish you luck though

It's like I try painstakingly to gain the respect of the people I want as friends, but even my most diligent efforts fail.

It's strange how people seem to respect people who don't need their respect. In other words, when you learn to accept yourself without craving another person's respect, then other people will begin to respect you. I'm still trying to figure this out myself.

Alot of people respect a person who can physically and/or psychologically protect himself. If you are perceived as always vulnerable, then it may be hard to gain respect. I used to feel that the more vulnerable I was to a person, the more they would respect me. This is wrong and I really don't know how this got conditioned into me (actually, I have a few theories...).

It's more important to find your own dignity than to find other people's respect. Don't confuse your own dignity with other people's respect--to do so is to invite pain, frustration, and confusion.

It's a learning process

And I am also tired of people with the same interests turning me down for a relationship, but going out with drunken, drug-addicted lowlifes.

well thats life
you have to deal with rejection and learn
not cry and sob over it
these guys have self confidence (for one)
you don't seem to
that does a lot
(plus you generalise people too much)

Here is what usually happens:

I make the first move, I get a correspondence going, and maybe get a total of 2 or 3 e-mails or PMs. Then I never hear from them again. And usually, the next time I do hear from them (if I hear from them at all), they're with the above-mentioned losers.

I can't think of anything I did to scare them away or offend them, the correspondence just ends for whatever reason.

well right there
you always assume the worst

I want someone with similar interests and beliefs to be attracted to me, not the losers.

well your problem, is that you judge and blame others for you not getting anywhere

Well I've taken all the steps I know how to take.

And this wasn't a generalization. I have noticed that these people actually are dating the types of guys I described. I have done online searches for certain interests, and in many cases, those were the types of guys these people were dating.

well man, describe to me, all what you want a girl to have that you want to date
and I will tell you where you can improve, etc

I want someone with similar interests and beliefs.

Of course I do want all the inner qualities to be there (honesty, respect, faithfulness, etc.)

okay and can you make that more details

I was looking for people who like South Park. There are only three females at my school who like it (2 NTs, 1 Aspie). All three of them were already in relationships.

And the only female Aspie at my school, not only is she already in a relationship, but she's in a relationship with another female.

That means that everybody at my school who is single is conservative.