Dear "You"...From "Me"-Letters Unsent

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you have every right to feel bad
and if you do we'll be here to help

Dear Aaron

I.AM.INDESTRUCTIBLE!! !! !

-Aaron the Indestructible.

Dear Chloé.

I'm going to miss you in the following weeks/months.
I'll barely be able to see you due to exams.
Then you go to France for a month.
When you get back, I'll be in Morocco.
When i get back then, you'll be in Turkey.

I'm really going to miss you while i know i shouldn't.
I'm not allowed to miss you as I'm not allowed to love you.

Maybe the love feelings will go away these next months, but I'm not sure if that's what i want.
Things would be normal and easy without it and i don't want that.

I love to feel this deep emotion like a human instead of the autistic blank-minded stick i used to think i was.

Dear friend

I can't wait to go shopping tomorrow!
I can't wait for Download!
I can't wait to go for a late-night picnic and try and spot some star constellations!
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

To an old friend,

Goodbye appetite. You were good to me. After dealing with the narrow-minded views of my mother, I don't need you anymore. I hope that you could find somebody who really needs you a lot more than I.

Cockney

Dear Self,

Calm down. You'll do fine. Stressing and being hyper will only make you forget things. Get some sleep and in the morning, finish those reviews. You'll do fine, just like always.

Sincerely,
The Saner, Calmer, and Apparantly Nonfunctioning Self

Dear appetite,

I didn't mean it that way. I just want you to loosen your grip so I can get back down to at least 175 lbs.

Cockney

why do you wanna lose weight?

To make my mum happy and shut her up, I guess. I'm getting sick of her asking, "How is that weightloss of yours going"? when I seem to be either maintaining or gaining a little. I'm quite happy with my Sid-like appearance, but my mum wants me to look more like my size 8 sister. I'm not trying to be like that character, either. I just happen to be like him in more ways than one. My mum doesn't want me as I am today. She wants me as I was, ten years ago, as Austin Powers so to speak. She wants Austin, not Shelby (my name).

I'm happier than I was, when I was doing Weight Watchers, from 2003 until 2006. I was happy and jolly until I've gone below the 170 lbs mark, and than I became this very impossible b***h who was really hard for the typical person to talk to.

look-I'm gonna say this, your mom is a b***h!
She's making you want to starve yourself and do something you don't wanna do for her
f**k her-do you wanna lose weight?
not for anyone but for you
if the answer is no-then don't
don't let her control and manipulate you

You won't believe how many times I've called her a b***h to myself, over the past two weeks. I'm going off my diet and I'll be maintaining for now. I'm living on my own, now. She's not my boss, anymore. Half of her siblings have weight problems. She'd never press the fitness issue with them. Parents talk to their kids the way that they would never talk to anybody else. You're right! My mum truly is a b***h. OOOhh...small, powerful size twelve mother. I'm only going to visit her for two hours at a time. If she asks me anything about my weight, I'll cut the visit short and tell her that I need to clean my flat, which I usually do.

or just not see her for awhile

That's a good idea.

yeah...my dad used to control me-tell me what to wear, how long to grow my hair
and he'd get super mad if I tried to resist
he even tried to tell me who I was when i wanted to go all metal head you know
I refuse to shop with him anymore (we don't do much of anything together anymore-we don't have a good relationship but he is clueless to anything around him)
it's hard in an all NT family trust me I know-they think you'll jsut grow out of it and that you have no real problems

My mum thinks that the Punk thing is a put on...an act. She doesn't realise that it's who I really am. The Austin Powers act was a put on from 2003, until I've moved out in November. I was putting on the Austin Powers act for three years to make her happy and keep her quiet. I did go Punk for three months in 2003. If my mum can't accept me as I am, I should take at least a two week break from her. The break can't be too long, because my dog's living there. My apartment complex doesn't take pets, because it gets too hot in the summer. I've come to the realization over the past three months, that I have to make myself happy. If the late 1970s does it for me, than I congratulate myself. I'm honouring the decade that I was born in. I was born in 1974, but 1977 is my favourite year. I've come to my senses, over the past five months.

I'll come every two weeks for a brief while and if she mentions anything about my weight, I'll cut the visit shrot and tell her that I have chores and errands.