Rants

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How sweet of you, thank you. 2 more years to go, then we can leave. I am fantasising about saying 'bye bye' to my current life and getting a fresh start elsewhere.

My husband and daughter are nice to me, it's just the rest of them who aren't

Sorry I'm repeating myself but I have no one else to tell.

I have officially given up on trying to make friends from today. The friend I worked hard to get has been ghosting me for 4 months. We never had a row or difference of opinion. As far as I knew it was all good. At one time she said I was one of her best friends. But as usual, some mysterious thing happened, I'll never know what it was, and she decided she wouldn't contact me again.

I've had this happen before a few times- I thought the friendship with someone was fine, but the friend had secretly taken offence at something I'd said but not told me. Then when I asked if she was okay as I hadn't heard from her for a while, she let loose a torrent of anger at me because of whatever it was I'd said. I remain mystified to this day.

I'm done. I've been trying to make friends in my village for 20+ years and nothing has worked. Well, I've got 1 friend, lol.

I am not chasing after people anymore. I'm not asking if they're okay or if I upset them. I'm not always being the one to make the first move. I am doing my own thing now, for me! Good.

If people don't want to be friends then sometimes it is just easier to not bother.

That's the problem. People don't want to be friends with me! Am I to go through life friendless? It seems that way! What a fun life eh! No friends, no social life! Whoopee do.

I had lots of friends in my late teens/ twenties. Where the he|| did they go? What is happening to humans!

You have friends here.....but I guess it would be much better if they were "in-person" friends.

Thank you. I value my online friends It was just hard having no one when I had a tiny sick child and no support with her.

I want to blow my f*****g brains out. Every interaction I have with another person goes to s**t. Every little thing that I say apparently needs to be mocked and intensely questioned. I genuinely hate interacting with other people. Other people f*****g suck.

You had a husband who loved you, and loved your child. That's worth all the friends in the world.

My husband was out all day at work, I was alone thinking my child was dying. No car to take her to the doctor. No friends or neighbours to help or even talk to. We live down a long, lonely road in the middle of nowhere. It really was awful and frightening. I'm sorry but there was nothing good about those years. If I'd had somewhere to run to, I'd have left, that's how bad it was. Thanks for being kind though.

Last edited by KitLily on 15 Nov 2022, 5:36 am, edited 2 times in total.

I hear you, friend. Mockery seems to be all they do these days. They can't seem to understand human speech, either.

My friend got yelled at by their dad (who works at the same place as us) because one of our managers complained about them not doing overtime on Friday. That manager is the shittiest manager that we have. Maybe he should complain about my coworkers who didn't come to work that day and about the ones who left immediately at 2:30, before he b*****s about people from other departments not picking up their slack. Tattling on adults to their parents because you don't like the fact that they don't act like they've sold their soul to the company and bend to every demand of overtime from them is also f*****g stupid.

I just don't get why people are so brain dead that they can't understand or tolerate the most simplest things that I say to them and have to get aggressive or pushy about it. Everyone has to have an attitude when I do so much as breathe, and doctors have to act like I'm a psychotic drug addict for absolutely no goddamn reason. Everyone takes everything wrong and has no patience or ability to analyze anything for longer than a second.

Oh yes I understand. I want to shake people sometimes and say, 'Use your brain!' 'Open your mind!' I wonder if it is due to people having no attention spans anymore due to the fast moving world we live in now.

It's like when I explain something to someone and they stare blankly. I explain again with slightly different words. They stare blankly. I explain again using slightly different words. 'Oh!!' they exclaim. 'Why didn't you say that in the first place?' Er...I did? How did you not understand that simple concept?

I hate the state of the rental market in the UK at the moment. I hate where I live and I want to move so badly but doing so would mean at least doubling what I currently pay in rent which isn't affordable and even when you do find a suitable property you've got people offering more than the advertised rent, or 6-12months rent in advance which I can't compete with. Yes, I'm lucky to have a place to live that's relatively cheap but I've been here 12 years, the last 4 at least very unhappily and that's got to be bad for your mental health. I know its bad. I feel trapped.

I'm sorry to hear it was so bad for you, and that your daughter wasn't well. I hope she's better now. You seem to have been a very devoted and loving mum despite all the loneliness you experienced, and the fear that you felt. I know your husband worked, but I was pointing out that he did love you and your daughter regardless, and you had his support emotionally. When he came from work you had someone to talk to, and someone who cared equally about your future as well as your daughter's.

It seems we do have a bit in common because I had the same fears and insecurities. My husband left us when my daughter was six months old. I was raising two babies by myself with no friends or family. I had no choice but to end my maternity leave and go back to work full-time out of the house, which meant getting up at 4 a.m. to shuffle them to two different daycare facilities, work a full day, and get home about 7 pm after collecting them. My ex didn't help at all, and in fact he sued us for the kids' house and to avoid paying any support. My legal fees for two years of litigation were 10x my yearly salary. My daughter was very sick as well but I couldn't stay home to care for her, even when she was in hospital in critical condition at 15 months old. If I lost or quit my job, I would have lost custody. Any potential friends I could have made at work viewed me as a freak for having so many responsibilities and problems at my young age. They scattered like dust.

This is why I'm saying you were lucky to have the love of your husband. I know it's awful not having friends and I craved them too. It's awful feeling like a pariah in your own neighbourhood or feeling alienated from other mothers and fathers at the park or in parenting groups. Parenting is such a difficult job, and even more so as autistic parents without a support circle. I wish WP had been around back then so the two of us could have talked. I wish I could have been your friend!

I'm sorry you had that situation, it sounds almost impossible to cope with. I'm glad you made it through. And it makes me angry when fathers do that to their children. What on earth are they thinking? People can be unbelievably selfish.

It would indeed have been nice to have WP back then and had some support. The internet was very new when my daughter was little and it didn't work very well.

For the benefit of the inevitable critics and judges out there:
I don't want to list the other problems I had and I am not going to feel guilty for having fewer problems than one person, and more problems than someone else. We all have different problems and it is not a competition.