Marknis wrote:
My older brother is throwing an Oktoberfest at his brewery while I am suffering from loneliness this weekend. For my entire 30 years of existence, I have always been in my older brother's shadow. He always had friends over, more priveleges than I did, and girls threw themselves at him while I was pushed to the wayside. I wanted to prove him wrong that I was a failure and loser for not following the crowd like him but my efforts never succeeded. I am still a hurt and lonely child in my heart because of him.
I understand the lonely feelings, but if you want to stop seeing yourself as living in your brother's shadow, then maybe you should step out of said shadow. Metaphorically speaking of course. Your obsession will only consume you further, you shouldn't compare your lot to someone else's. It's a power you should not let someone have over you. This is YOUR life. You shouldn't be trying to live your brother's life. You aren't your brother.