I need to vent a bit, don't mind me...

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Ugh....what a day....it's Friday which means it's BUSY out there which mean I usually do what I can to avoid the mad, massing throng.

I had to go up to the hospital with my partner today, and today I am particularly bad at reading people, so I was finding it almost impossible to negociate the crowds, I was getting rather upset, arms flapping, trying to get through spaces, I darted for one of the entrances and as I squeezed past an old guy he shouted,

"F*** you!" at me.

It really REALLY annoyed me and if I wasn't in a hurry, I would have really shouted at this git!

I think sometimes the frustration gets to me, I see the weird looks and head turns as I run between gaps of people, but I just can't see any other way to get through a crowd and I am in extreme distress, the mood I am in today I just wish all NT's would p*** off and just leave me alone.

I was already so close to tears with the frustration of it, I guess his callous remark really struck a nerve, I'm so fed-up with NT's lately......I suppose if I was obviously disabled in some way it would be different (oh wait, no prejudice is alive and well, ironic that prejudice isn't terribly prejudiced about being prejudiced!) I mean, I sometimes wish people could understand. Crowds like that just make me want to not exist in those moments, it's truly unbareable......

I know, I'm just moaning a bit, I always seem to be more aspie at the start of my period whicih doesn't help.

The last time I had a really , really bad day with NT's I spontaneously figured out the probability of their self inflicted extinction and how it would occur .

They are not really that bad and they generally don't mean it, or at least can't help it.

It's just a bad day. They have them too.

Do you like Plath- she is the only writer I have come across who used "dust mote", apart from WS
who used "mote" in the Merchant Of Venice.

Thanks memesplice I'm willing to bet that old guy never so much as gave me a second though, I think because I was already upset about how busy it was, his comment just compounded how I felt and I think made me think to myself 'why even bother' if just walking along the corridor was so difficult in the first place.

I've never ever heard of Plath before, but I've always been fascinated by the way dust particles behave in a beam of light, the way they seem to be both suspended and dancing about at the same time, plus there's the theory that our whole planet is nothing more than a tiny speck of dust caught in the light. Sometimes I feel a little bit like I'm caught floating in a beam of light myself! Anyway, I think that's what dust particles are referred to, as in motes, but I can't think of any other example of that word either!

Sometimes the swarm of NT's feels like an undifferentiated mass of people, they all look the same to me, they walk at me but it's like they don't see me and don't leave me enough room, that has always really upset me.
Logically it seems to ridiculous, why is it I can remember Pre-Cambrian/Ordovician/Silurian/Devonian/Carboniferous/Permian/Triassic/Jurassic/Cretaceous/Paleogene/Neogene/Quaternary and yet I can't tell what direction someone is going?
I always have this feeling that they're better clued-in than me, and that makes me feel so vunerable!!

Oh, yeah, I was reading about your recycled kitchen in another thread, I personally think that's genius, not weird or stupid, I wish I was a bit more handy myself and able to do things like that, I hate seeing good things go to waste, we've become obsessed with disposable lives, and yet life is one of the greatest forces of recycling there is, it can take death and make it into something (lots of somethings!) that are beautiful! I wish human beings would copy this more.

its like going back into the matrix after learning the truth, damn red pill!