autism dream

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i had a dream a few (2.5 i think) weeks ago that i feel might also interest others here at WP. (I feel it is a lot to do with what inspiration and knowledge, help and support i've gotten and still get from here) .. the day i had it i had been to my normal supermarket for groceries. an unusual thing happened that i think is what the dream is commenting on. in the store i approached a woman working there to ask something about a sale or price or some such normal thing. when she replied she looked straight into my face. Then I realised I had pretty much a full blown anxiety attack. right there in the store! and then of course thought of my autism I'm in the process of rediscovering (realizing). and asked her again, only this time very clearly NOT looking into her face. and it all felt so different. like i in that instant understood emotionally what all this struggle my entire life has been about. trying to be a "normal" person and talking to them in their way .. whereas if i accept my autism and unablility to look people in the eye i'm saved! safe! calm. at ease!!

in the dream .. i was approaching some sort of smallish counter .. it looked like it took place in an airport or maybe a supermarket .. large indoor somewhat shiny place .. i started asking the two women behind the counter of something mundane (both wearing white coats and one wearing glasses) (maybe indicating medical people .. in turn referring to my emotional healing process, i think) .. and then one of them said - you are not looking at us when you speak to us. whereupon after some hesitation and feeling embarrassed i admitted "i am a little autistic" .. then one of the women pointed at my upper left arm. there was an armband! it was made of light green fabric. about an inch wide .. saying "Autistic" printed in light yellow letters. then i looked back at the women. then they said something like "you can be both autistic yet also powerful" (or forceful .. resourceful or something like that .. ??) like reassuring me that being autistic and not hiding that fact was OK. not a sign of being a complete hopeless failure ..

Oh! Very positive. In some ways Autism is like an arm band that you can never take off - It's in our mannerisms. The real struggle is learning to like that arm band.

That might make things easier

I love hearing about dreams. Thank you for sharing! I've had some wild ones myself.

Thank you for sharing that.