I recently discovered I had AS and am unsure of what to do

Post Reply New Topic

I recently discovered I had AS and am unsure of what to do with this information.

I mean, my life seems to make so much more sense, but at the same time I don't know what I can do about it. I've always been trying to treat myself inadvertently without even knowing I had this condition. In the back of my mind, I knew there was something wrong with me but I wasn't able to put my finger on it until now.

There is no cure for this condition. It's something that we need to cope with. Now, I'm unsure about myself and my future than ever. Considering the statistics, my chances of marriage seems to be nil. I'll have a difficult time being a parent and I don't want my children to grow up underdeveloped in any way. I'm most likely going to have a friendless, lonely life.

What do I do?

First: Quit being a worrywart. I don't know where you're getting your statistics. Sounds like you've just been reading too many teenage "Poor Pitiful Me' posts in the romance threads here.

I have a completely neurotypical child who's in a Math and Science prep school right now. And - I've been married three times, so don't tell me Aspies can't get married.

AS is not a death sentence. It's just who you are - that didn't change when you put a label on it. Finding out what it was didn't add or detract from whatever strengths and weaknesses you had before you'd ever heard the name Asperger. A certain number of the human population has been living with this condition as long as there have been humans, and that was waaaaaayyyy before Hans Asperger ever noticed the pattern and wrote it down. Those humans all managed, and you will, too.

I am by no means saying that you may not have obstacles to deal with that not everybody has - you will, and that sucks. But none of those obstacles need defeat you. I can tell just by your ability to use language, you're too smart to let a handicap stop you.

live your life

When i found out, did a few things to help get my life straightened out:

1) Got a case manager (some people may be against this due to bad experiences, but its a start)
2) Since im no longer a student, case management directed me to Vocational Rehabilitation and Job Coach
3) Attend Spectrum therapy group (also recommended by the Case Manager)

You have pretty much found out something of yourself that didnt have much of a definition, and now you have something concrete to work with. You are your own statistic, so anything else outside of you doesnt mean much . . . your "fate" is still what you make of it. You give in to despair, you future is bleak . . . you make some level of attempts and keep track of what you do wrong, and your future might turn out better. Its one of those laws of human life that upsets and confuses a lot of us in the spectrum, but accepting it is the first and hardest part . . . followed closely by the social interactions required of us in current society. Your life, your choice . . . we're here to help when you ask for it.

Your life is what you make it. You can have a good life, or a lousy life. I hope you choose to have a good, happy life.

heres what to do tuck in the back of your head and use it when helpful