Health stress in solitude

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Just going to vent a little here, as I currently don't have anyone to talk to about this. It might be nice to hear others' opinions, or just some reassurance.

Yesterday I had to deal with going to the emergency room of a hospital alone, for the first time. If fact it was the first time I'd seen the inside of a hospital for about a decade, and certainly the first time in an American hospital. My social anxiety made this an ordeal, but my worry about my health eclipsed that anxiety by a wide margin.

I've been having a persistent dull pain for the last few days (nothing too severe), which I felt might go away on its own until Sunday morning, when I woke up sweating, dizzy and nauseous. Fortunately the staff at the hospital couldn't have been more friendly and calming, which I really appreciated, but it was nonetheless a pretty harrowing experience overall. That was because I was on my own, with no family or friends to support or advise me in person. Because my family live on the other side of the world, I didn't even have anyone to put down as an emergency contact. The most reassurance I had was an IM conversation with my mother before I left my apartment, and then it was nearly 4 hours before I got home late in the evening, aching and dizzy. I'd never felt this physically vulnerable before.

The doctor couldn't give me a concrete diagnosis, just antibiotics, a prescription to help with the pain and a recommendation to see a urologist if things don't improve, so I didn't get much peace of mind out of the visit at all. The pain is still there and I can't tell if it's getting better or worse yet, and although I feel I can do whatever I have to to sort it out, the worry and stress is really eating me up. I'm somewhat content living alone, but this experience is putting into perspective how dangerous it could be if some serious illness ever made me physically incapable of looking after myself. It's possible this might need to be solved with an operation, and I don't like to think about how I'd cope with that alone. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be in any condition to drive myself home afterwards.

I wonder if anyone here can relate? I'm sure there are a few others who live alone. I just about manage to get through life independently, but facing unknown problems with my health like this is causing some very real fear - especially when there's no clear cause or solution yet.

I can certainly relate. I live on my own, too. However, I am in a more fortunate position of being physically close to my family and know that they will drop everything if something really serious was to happen. I was sick a few times though and thought (always at night) how it would be great to have someone to check up on me under the same roof.

If you live near Los Angeles and things get worse (hopefully not!), I can come by and help you out. I hope you feel better soon.

i wonder how many hermits die of acute illnesses alone, with nobody else knowing about it?

I have an appointment to see someone tomorrow, so hopefully I'll get some reassurance out of that. This week has just been non-stop aches and pains, all day. Getting to sleep has been harder than ever.

I think part of what makes the situation scary is also the realisation that the doctors don't actually have all the answers - the two I saw on Sunday told me the possible causes, and both were things I'd already learned about just from looking up my symptoms online. It was a relief to rule out some of the horror stories I'd come across (typing any sort of symptom into Google leads to all sorts of terrifying accounts of things people have suffered through - some made me feel physically ill), but at the same time, not getting a concrete diagnosis from an expert is unsettling. I just want to be able to put this behind me as soon as possible, not get cured through lengthy and costly trial and error.