so alone...

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Sometimes when I'm at home bury my face in my couch and lie there for hours. Often when I do this I position my arms as if I'm holding someone. I get so lonely sometimes.

I also get intrusive thoughts a lot. Sometimes they tell me to do crazy things or believe crazy things. Often I find myself actually believing what they tell me for a second or two. It makes my head hurt trying to constantly suppress all these thoughts.

I also keep getting the feeling like I'm a bad person, that people are mad at me, and that I need to be a better person. It's as if my mind won't be satisfied with me until I'm Ghandi.

Finally, WP was trolled with shock images not so long ago and the images keep popping up in my mind and make me want to vomit.

DarthMetaKnight - I understand intrusive thoughts. I understand the feeling of sadness from being alone. Many is the time I have felt annoyed that others recieved hugs a lot in life and I didn't, when I was in college and such.

Intrusive thoughts can be a struggle, and a battle. The best way to deal with intrusive thoughts is to not deal with them at all - to ignore them and not let them raise your anxiety levels.

DarthMetaKnight, you have my support. *Hug*

Thank you. I enjoyed that.

I'm sort of like this, main thing that makes me different though is I don't allow myself time to lie around or think about anything aside from accomplishing things.

I know I'm never going to be perfect and I never try to be. I try to be true to myself and my morals and nothing more. Though I will say that it gets me down that I can think lustfully about my friends who are taken.

Don't suppress your thoughts. Let them do what they do. But pay attention, and see that they are just thoughts and have no power over you unless you allow it. Observe the thoughts without getting involved with them, then you will be free. It may help to sit somewhere quiet to do this.

Intrusive thoughts are a symptom of OCD.

The person with OCD does not believe these thoughts or true or wish for them to be true but they still get disturbed as is they were true.

You should be evaluated by someone qualified to diagnose OCD.

learn to meditate

All of this advice posted so far is sound, and worth investigating.
I have had difficulties with intrusive thoughts, and it can be a symptom of OCD indeed, and often a type of OCD called Pure O, meaning pure obsessive.
Learning to meditate can be very beneficial to your state of mind and also body. Meditation can be wonderful and bring about amazing feelings and great changes in confidence and self esteem - you can benefit greatly from trying this.
What helped me with intrusive thoughts is using a white chestnut flower remedy, which is for intrusive thoughts, and also one fish oil omega 3 tablet a day.
Obviously, general exercise helps with body and mind too.
Humans are flawed and thoughts exist; it's just negative energy though - don't panic, because it is not you.
Letting the thoughts persist and do what they do in your mind whilst ignoring them and not constantly ruminating for a meaning or reason, is the way to go about this. I know it is tempting to fight the thoughts, but try not to, and do not worry about them and the scary nature of them.
A very nice day for you sir. *Hug* Feel well. x