Severe gender dysphoria

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Almost every day, I end up crying at some point because I feel like the wrong gender. I don't want to be a man anymore; it hurts too much. If I go outside and see a woman I can end up wanting to cry.

I have a very masculine-shaped body and I hate it deeply. Two years of female hormones have hardly done anything for me - I still look like a man and nobody "mistakes" me for a woman.

I get suicidal feelings a lot. I hardly do anything at all outside of work, and work is getting hard for me. I really think that I would be better off dead than have this miserable life, since zero is greater than all negative numbers. Despite that, I have no motivation to actually make plans to kill myself.

I have no hopes, no dreams, no reason to live.

Maybe you should talk to your doctor/therapist about how you feel, your progress & reasonable expectations? I know an MTF myself & she's now at the point where she's just very androgynous.

Crap...that's rough. Sorry to hear you are going through all that.

Maybe you need heavier doses of female hormones?

I wish you didn't talk about suicide as much.

I see you are unhappy with life, how you are, everything in it. But you admitted you don't want to kill yourself, you just hate everything about yourself. Two completely different things.

As for the GID stuff: you're more of help to me than the other way around.

I hate being a woman, and I really want to be a man. It drives me up the wall, some days.